Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 21

I wonder if Survivor's producers, after Stephenie became the last member standing of the Ulong tribe a few seasons back, came up with something they might possibly call the "Palau Contingency", a plan disguised as a twist just in case one tribe keeps getting their butts handed to them immunity after immunity. Heck, at least Ulong managed to win a reward challenge or two. Ravu can barely even win our sympathy.
This possible contingency plan likely states that if one tribe loses often enough, rather than have them just keep losing until the merge, things will be shaken up and the tribes remixed.
After all, what are the odds that this particular twist would happen on the season where one tribe wouldn't win a challenge if it was "Guess which hand I'm hiding a quarter in"?
So the tribes were reforming. Earl from Ravu and Edgardo from Moto got to be the "captains" and choose who they'd like to have on their teams. To nobody's surprise on the first season where only members of one sex have been voted out so far, they each pick a guy. Everyone had to pick from the opposing tribe, so Edgardo chose Mookie and Earl chose "Boo". Yeah. Mookie picked a guy too, but "Boo" chose Michelle. Oh! That was unexpected! Edgardo's team picked man after man, but Michelle called out Cassandra's name! Don't you get it, Michelle? You have to choose strong! STRONG!
It was interesting to see it all shape up. Earl's team ended up with Stacy and Yau-Man as well, while the "weakest" member of Edgardo's team was Anthony. Personally, I think the weakest member of that tribe is "Rocky", but more on that later.
It did come down to Yau-Man versus Lisi at the end, and when Yau-Man was picked, Lisi was sent off to Exile Island where she would remain until after Tribal Council, when she would then join the losing tribe. Like that worked out really well for Sylvia.
Lisi didn't take any of this well and started talking about how her time on Survivor was over, raising the ire of host Jeff Probst. Jeff doesn't like to hear people talk about quitting, damn it! I'm sure he's got Osten locked away in a dungeon somewhere, but the FBI won't take my calls seriously enough to investigate.
After the tribes were picked and Lisi was carted off to her snake-infested island, there was only one matter left to settle. Who would get the luxury of Moto's camp?
In one of the greatest reward challenges ever, Edgardo got to pick one of two buffs out of a bag!
Sometimes good things do happen in life, and Edgardo picked the Ravu buff, meaning this new Ravu tribe would have to go back to the crappy Ravu camp and the new Moto would get to go on to the sweet island life.
I admit, I was a bit biased against Edgardo's tribe because it was all men. The sexist nature of much of the voting has driven me to that. Ravu kept voting out woman after woman, yet they still kept losing. This fetish for physical strength obviously hasn't been the issue. And never mind that a couple of the woman voted out were physically stronger than Yau-Man. He's a man, it even says so in his name! That makes him strong! Seriously, it's been driving me crazy.
This kind of sexism isn't new to Survivor, but it reached new lows with this episode and with this new Ravu tribe. I'm not saying they're Saudi or Taliban bad, but damn, the Ravu tribesmen were full of themselves for having penises and as such would own the rest of the season! Booya!
In 14 seasons of Survivor, there were tribes I've wanted to win or lose so bad I could taste it. The aforementioned Ulong in Palau, Morgan in the Pearl Islands, Yasur on Vanuatu, and heck, Aitu last season, all teams I loved to see win and really, so very much wanted to see win. None of it has come close to how much I wanted to see Moto win immunity this week and send the sexist pigs to Tribal Council. Granted, not all of them are sexist. Anthony didn't come across that way, and the guy was seen as the weakest member of the tribe and treated like it. Especially by "Rocky".
Screw it, "Rocky". That's the last time I'm going to use that stupid nickname on you, James. Up until now, James has been loud and obnoxious with the worst of his sexism coming out when he couldn't stand Rita talking as a woman with another woman. His hatred of women came out in full force in this episode, along with his hatred of men he perceives as weak, or as he kept referring to Anthony, "effeminate".
Ladies and Gentlemen, we finally have a full-blown villain for this season. Unfortunately, he's not an entertaining one like Mirna and Charla are on The Amazing Race. No, sadly he's just a homophobic, misogynistic asshole with too high an opinion of himself. It's my blog, I can use that language if I want.
It was impossible to take him seriously when he told us that he loves women. He loves talking to them, though that claim doesn't hold up well considering that he went after Rita because she, you know, talked. He loves being with them, he loves paying for sex with them... Okay, he didn't say that last part, but he clearly sees women who aren't his family as lesser beings and quite possibly as objects. Hell, how did he insult Anthony? But comparing him to a woman and calling him "effeminate". That brought to light not only his misogyny, but his homophobia too. If the cameras weren't on him, I wonder if he would have used even more derogatory terminology. Maybe he did, but the producers opted not to show it.
Oh, and he's a bully too. A misogynistic, homophobic bully. The way he treated Anthony around camp, expecting the man to do all his work while putting up with his verbal assaults was horrendous. Good on Anthony on not letting loose and punching him in the throat, because damn, James deserved it.
So yeah, James has now beaten "Jonny Fairplay", Scout, and Twila as my most disliked Survivor contestant ever. Congratulations, jackass.
I thought it would be too much to ask after the testosterone squad ended up as Ravu that they'd also lose the immunity. Daaaaaamn, I wanted them to lose. There's no way to get such goodness twice in one episode.
The great thing about watching it on tape, which is what I did with this episode, is being able to fast forward through the competition. There was just too much at stake for me to be able to handle the mistake. Once Moto won and I let the cheers out, I rewound it and watched everything unfold. Damn, that was the sweetest win ever.
Now we were finally going to get to see a man voted out. It wasn't as good as it would have been if there would have been at least one woman on that tribe (Lisi will be joining them next week, so after the way she treated "Dreamz" and Cassandra, maybe there really is some karma in the universe), but it was going to be nice to see.
Unfortunately it was looking like that man was going to be Anthony, someone James convinced everyone else is the weakest link. Anthony didn't just stand by and let this happen though. He made sure he let the others know just how much negativity James brings to the tribe, and oh, does he ever.
Instead of all those women being voted out one by one, I wonder how much better Ravu would have been if they got rid of James early. He hasn't done anything to keep them in contention at the challenges, and he has been a hugely negative force in camp. There was no reason to get rid of Rita other than that she annoyed him, and he's quickly turned on any alliances he's had.
One small problem that escaped both James and Anthony is that by turning on themselves, neither of them are going to have numbers on their side. Whichever one goes, that leaves the other and Mookie as the only two original members of Ravu, and when Lisi joins them next week, that will be Edgardo, Alex, "Dreamz" and Lisi from the original Moto against Mookie and whoever is left. What they needed to do was stick together, and feel out who would most likely flip from Moto. Last week "Dreamz" couldn't wait for the merge so he could change sides. Nobody but us knew this, but nobody will know it if they don't try to find out these things.
Earl on the new Moto is becoming Realivision's choice to win this season. He was smart enough to know that numbers matter on Survivor, and he was able to get Cassandra over on his side. Luckily they never had to go to Tribal Council, but if they did, I strongly suspect it would have been a former Moto member going home. Sadly it would have been Stacy as the only other choice would have been "Boo" and why would they vote him off when there's another woman they could send packing? Damn, I'm really hoping the women have noticed this particular numbers issue. The best they (and Yau-Man) can hope for now is that once the merge happens, the manly men start picking each other off.
There is an amazing lack of foresight on the show this season. The only people we've seen really thinking ahead have been Alex, Earl, and "Dreamz". Most of the old Moto were happy where they were, and the old Ravu were just wanting to try and win the next challenge, concentrating on strength even though it was puzzles that kept doing them in. This is making any actual strategizing a breath of fresh air. Too bad for the former Ravu that they're stuck with a genius like James on the new Ravu. Done right, this mixing of the tribes could have been the best thing that ever happened to them.
Before getting to Tribal Council, something happened on the new Ravu that left me questioning the producers. They caught fish. Normally this wouldn't be worth noting, but the old Ravu never got fishing equipment. So how did the new tribe get fishing line? If they're going to do this twist, then the new tribes should have exactly what the old tribes did, nothing more, nothing less.
Okay, Tribal Council. As expected, it was down to James versus Anthony. James continued to be a bully, calling Anthony "effeminate" and berated him for his lack of social skills. You may think you do, but you don't truly know the meaning of "irony" until you've seen James bitching about someone else's lack of social skills.
The looks on the faces of the men who weren't going home as James kept flapping his hateful gums gave me hope. Anthony did tell them what a negative influence this ass was, and they were obviously seeing it. Or just feeling bad for Anthony. I really hope they weren't feeling bad for Anthony because they felt like this crap was something he needed to hear. He doesn't. He's fine just the way he is. I'll take a dozen of him over one James any day.
I did like how he stuck up for himself, though I would have thrown a couple of f-bombs at the f-wad. He wondered if being a jerk was what it took to be a strong, manly man, and he didn't think they needed the extra drama and negativity in camp. Well, maybe he should have been an ass, because the new Ravu voted him out.
Unbelievable. James is an idiot and has never, as far as I can remember, been a physical asset. Maybe because he's so loud and obnoxious he comes across as stronger than he is, but he's only going to keep dragging Ravu down for as long as he's in the game.
Though with the new tribe dynamics and wanting to see Ravu keep losing, I'm not so sure that's a bad thing.

Grease: You're The One That I Want - Aired March 18

Can you believe it? From the highs and lows of the auditions to the disappointment of Grease Academy not being all it could and should be to some great and not-so-great performances, we've finally come to this, the finals. One more Danny and one more Sandy will be going home, then the final four will compete for the last time for audience votes, and then one more episode to go, the season (and possibly series) finale.
Coming out to perform "Rock'n'roll Is Here To Stay", the final six did a pretty good job of making it actually sound like rock'n'roll which has been one of the biggest flaws with the competitors through the season. Was it perfect? No. But it was fun and that's what really matters.
There was some stuff with the contestants talking on video as to how much they want this, blah blah blah. I know I generally gloss over this video stuff, but that's because it doesn't really matter. The only thing about it is that the contestants should be a lot more careful with their words, as the voting public tends to favour humble over arrogant, or even confident for that matter.
We didn't have to wait for the results of last week, as there was no way to build the suspense without making the ousted auditioners compete for nothing.
First up were the Sandys. To nobody's surprise, Laura was safe. Then Billy Bush called Ashley's name, and he did his best to keep some suspense here. He did so well (and it's rare you'll ever see me compliment Billy Bush) that Ashley obviously thought she was leaving. I'm not exaggerating when I say "obviously". The emotions that played over her face were all over the place, but the dawning horror that came with the thought that she was about to be told that she was done was very visible and you could see the tears start welling up. After stringing her along long enough, Billy told her she was safe, and it all disappeared to be replaced by joy.
Manipulating emotions and breaking hearts. That's good television!
So Allie was gone, and she took the news like a real trooper. But don't let it get you down, kid, you're goin' places! (Imagine the last two sentences being spoken by someone in a movie from the Forties, as that's how it sounded in my head when I wrote them.)
Because these were the last eliminations before the finale, Allie got a nice little video tribute showing her journey from the auditions until now. That was sweet.
Next were the Dannys, and Austin was... pause for dramatic effect... safe. And the other Danny proceding on would be... after this commercial break.
Of course they never screw with minds the same way twice in a row, so when Derek's name was called next, it wasn't looking good for him. Sure enough, the best looking Danny and John Stamos' double was gone, and Max moved on.
Derek got his video journey as well, but he also got something Allie didn't. A word from one of the panel members. Kathleen was sad to see him go, and she said she was sure they would work together again. So I guess because Allie didn't get any similar encouragement, Kathleen must think the closest they'll ever work together again is when Allie asks her if she'd like fries with that. Don't be so mean, Kathleen. Allie rocks.
The competition would be different this week. Instead of singing their own songs, the Sandys and Dannys would be singing together so we could more easily compare and contrast them. I like this idea. It would have been a little tedious to see it carried throughout the season, but for one episode? Cool.
Laura and Ashley - Oh, this is one of those biggie songs, one of Sandy's biggest moments in Grease and frankly the only song in the whole thing I really don't care for - "Hopelessly Devoted To You". Laura has the stronger voice, but Ashley not only held her own, I actually liked her whole peformance (including the acting during the song) a little better. Still, this was a little too close to call.
Possibly because these were the finals, the panel didn't have any commentary after the song. Instead, each of the women got a video from a loved one. Laura had to push her wedding back because of this competition, and her fiance got to let her know how all their plans were coming along. Ashley's was more weepy with her sister letting her know how proud she was of her, despite early sibling rivalry over the whole theatre thing that came up after Ashley hurt herself and could no longer do ballet. She wishes she could be there, but unfortunately she couldn't afford the flight... If it weren't for the fans. Apparently a lot of people on the NBC message board came together to buy a ticket for Ashley's sister to come see her, and so she was able to be in the audience providing her support.
Audience voting is never on talent alone, so the winner from this video showdown has to be Ashley. The viewers like weepy.
The women then got to give a plea to the audience to vote for them, and they both seemed pretty even here.
Austin and Max - We've been hearing part of this song all season. The Dannys had to sing "Sandy", but fortunately for both of them it wasn't on the way out. I thought Austin sang more strongly, but Max acted it better and gave the right emotion for the lyrics.
Instead of videos from loved ones, the guys instead gave video interviews where they said what this competition means to them. Austin sees this as his last shot. He feels he needs to be somehwere by a certain age, and if this doesn't do it for him, it might be the end. Eh. I'm sorry, but if you really love performing, you will still do it even if you don't become a star. He should also be happy he's not a woman, or that age limit would be so much younger.
Max let us know he had Bell's Palsy as a child, and so he had to relearn how to use his face. He said because of this, it hurts when people say he's not "conventional looking" (though he isn't a conventional looking Danny, and that would be the case even without the palsy). No matter what else happens, I've got a strong feeling this video won the competition for Max. It's one thing to be a spunky underdog, but to overcome this too? He has this in the bag.
Billy then informed us that the margin between their votes from the previous week was about 1%. Yeah, that video surely put Max over the edge. The two men got their turn to plead for votes, but really, unless Austin started sharing how he was able to overcome years in a wheelchair, he's not going to beat Max no matter how hard he pleads.
There was still a lot of time left in the show, and I was wondering how they were going to fill it. It turned out the competition wasn't over yet. To help the audience judge chemistry, the Dannys and Sandys were going to take turns singing with each other.
The first song was "Endless Love", and the first couple was...
Austin and Ashley - Ashley was great, Austin not so much. But fortunately there was some chemistry there. Enough to make up for the difference in singing ability? I don't know.
Max and Laura - Laura was great, Max not so much. The women have outclassed the men throughout this whole process, and sadly enough we're at the final four and they still continue to do outshine. I'm afraid that no matter who becomes Danny, they're not going to be as good as Sandy and that could hurt the show. Max did put more emotion into the song than Danny, but I didn't feel any chemistry from this pairing which isn't good, as they seem to be the favourites.
It was then time to switch up and sing "I Had The Time Of My Life".
Laura and Austin - This was a much better song for Austin. So much so, I have to say this was my favourite performance of his yet. He was very strong through the whole song, and he did it in his baritone range, a range he seems to be a lot more comfortable and enjoyable in. He and Laura were very good together, and showed quite a bit of chemistry.
Ashley and Max - Neither of them were as strong as the other two here, but they were still pretty darned good. There was a lot more chemistry for Max with Ashley than there was between him and Laura.
Not that it matters. Based on the cheers in the audience alone, Max has this sewn up. If he does, it will be interesting to see how people who go see Grease on Broadway but have never seen this show will accept him.
Now that all the competitive singing was over, we finally got to hear from the panel.
Kathleen would love any one of them in the show, but who does she see most as a greaser and his high school sweetheart? Max and Laura.
Really? I know a lot of people love these two individually, but I felt no sparks at all between the two of them in their song.
Jim said the characters have evolved over the years, and he wouldn't have it any other way. Max and Laura were the two for him as well.
Oh come on. Am I the only one who was left cold by their duet?
David thought it came down to Austin's looks versus Max's humour, and that Max made him laugh so he feels America will fall in love with him, so he "edges it" for him. The women were almost too close to call, but Laura got it by that much just for passion alone.
I really hope for the sake of this Broadway production that I'm wrong about this lack of chemistry between Max and Laura if they win. However, I'm not so sure Laura's going to go all the way.
Yes, she's blown us away with many of her peformances, and by that measure alone she should get this. But as I've said many times, that's not all an audience votes on. She's always seemed a little... I don't want to insult her and I don't mean this in an insulting way... "colder" than Ashley, as well as a little less innocent. I don't mean Laura is cold and hardened by the ways of the world, but her emotions seem to be a little less close to the surface than Ashley, and that could hurt her despite her strong voice.
The Sandy votes could really go either way, and Ashley had enough strong performances this night to sway people who wanted to vote for her emotionally. I'd bet money on Max winning, but I wouldn't bet on the Sandys.
Finally we got to say goodbye to Derek and Allie.
Derek's version of "Sandy" was too upbeat for me, and his "Oh, Sandy!" at the end was with a smile. This made it so much easier to see him go. This last song is where they should be showing us what a big mistake it was to not vote for them, and "Sandy" needs to be full of longing.
Allie's "Look At Me, I'm Sandra Dee (Reprise)" was triumphant, a very nice way to end the last competitive episode of the season.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 18

Donald Trump is no stranger to hyperbole, but when the potential Apprentices met him on the set of NBC's soap opera Passions, he reached either a new high or low, depending on how you want to look at it. Either way, it was funny. It's obvious that The Apprentice is pre-taped, and this particular season was done some time ago, when The Donald referred to the recently cancelled Passions as one of "NBC's top-rated shows". As far as soaps go, this one has been a basement dweller since its inception, and now its end is coming.
It was an awesome moment made all that much better by the fact that the task, while related to soap operas, had nothing to do with the goings on in Harmony. Yeah, I watched Passions when it first came out, but the story lines dragged on for so friggin' long I lost patience and now I just stick to Days Of Our Lives.
The task this week was to make a 45 second "webisode" for Soft Scrub Deep Clean Foaming Cleanser. All I want to know is will it make me feel clean again after just plugging it? So dirty... So very dirty... Won't wash off! Now I know how the executives who would be judging this feel.
After he came close to being fired last week, Arrow's James decided the best thing for him to do would be to step up and be the project manager. This always happens when someone has a tough boardroom, but nobody should be letting themselves get into that position in the first place. You shouldn't be stepping into the PM role because now you feel you have something to prove. You should be clamouring for it from the start of the game, and you should be doing your damnedest to make sure Trump has no reason to fire you even if you lose, and I don't mean by covering your ass. Yes, if you have doubts about your team's approach to a task, air them early on, but once that's done, dig in and work as hard and as well as your can.
Over at Kinetic, Kristine got to remain PM after her win last week. She lucked into the half-time show, something she's done before, but now she has to create an entertaining and informative 45 second story, something outside her comfort zone.
The problems she had with Muna last week surfaced again, with Muna questioning things again and not wanting to work behind the camera. Allowing her to be one of the performers was a mistake on both their parts. When trying to communicate with an audience through a webcast, clarity is the most important thing and as cool as Muna's accent is, it's not the right thing to have on camera for this task in this format.
That wasn't Kristine's only mistake though. While Heidi and Muna were busy filming, she and Angela went out to do some shopping. Why? What is it about shopping that Angela couldn't have done by herself? Without a director behind the camera, things were not going well.
The only thing that might save Kinetic was Arrow's particularly lame production. We've discovered from this experience that not only can nobody on Arrow act, their idea of a performance is TALKING VERY LOUD!
"HEY HONEY, LOOK WHAT I DID! I CLEANED THE BATHROOM WITH THIS NEW SOFT SCRUB CLEANSER!"
"WONDERFUL! I'VE JOINED THE FOREIGN LEGION!"
"EMILY, NOOOOOO!"
"ENJOY YOUR CLEAN BATHROOM, BRICK!"
Despite how atrocious their production was, Arrow was very pleased with it in the editing room. No so much with Kinetic, where Muna was so hard to understand in places that they had to edit out quite a bit just to make their webisode someone understandable. I don't know what their time limit was, or what resources they had available, but I was wondering if there was any way they could have dubbed over it all. Heck, if things were so far lost, I would have tried a comedic approach and dubbed the whole thing over in Spanish with obviously mismatched lipsynching then put in English subtitles.
Unfortunately, because so much was cut out, Kinetic also lost a lot of the product placement. If they had Kristine in front of the camera, they might well have won this task by having a more entertaining production, but they didn't and Arrow won this week.
Arrow's reward for winning was to fly to Sacramento in a private jet and meet the governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Honestly, there was a time where I thought that would have been cool to meet him, but not so much anymore. They enjoyed it though.
The firing was obviously going to be between Kristine and Muna, though you never know what could set off Trump in the boardroom. For the first time ever, we really saw a crack in Heidi's boardroom performance. When Trump asked her who she thought should be fired, she tried so hard to be diplomatic and not hurt the feelings of anyone she liked, she frustrated The Donald who just wanted her to make a decision.
Considering that he asked her what's happened, that she started out as a superstar but has been on the losing team way too often now, this wasn't the time for her to be diplomatic. When Trump asks you who should be fired, give him a name. If you must, say, "I have a lot of respect for her, but I would fire Muna." Trump liked Muna, and he did see how Kristine cost her team this task. However, Muna certainly contributed to the loss too. So with a tough decision on his mind, let's give him time to think as we look at our weekly feature, How Did The Winning Project Manager Compare to Heidi?
James was another quiet one. He did ask a question without prompting from Trump, always a good thing, but it was just one question. His comfort level didn't seem to be where it could be sitting at The Hair's side. A middling performance, not one that said, "There's The Apprentice!"
In the end, Muna paid the price for the loss this week. She didn't go out as angry as Aimee, but she wasn't as fine with the firing as Derek and Jenn were. She definitely wasn't pleased, that's for sure.
This leaves us with three members left on Kinetic versus five on Arrow, so don't be surprised to see a shake-up on the next episode. While I'd love to see Heidi take another turn at project manager and save her reputation, the way the season is set up for this now means Angela really should be getting that position as she hasn't taken a turn yet and she should fight tooth and nail to get the job.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 18

It's strange, this first episode without Rob and Amber. I'm not used to seeing them leave so early in any of these shows. The good news is that the race doesn't seem to be a lock for any one team now. Hell, even Mirna and Charla might come in first at some point. I know, and pigs will fly!
Thanks to the ending that surprised everyone, the second biggest bit of news from this episode was completely overlooked. Any other episode, except last week's, would have everyone buzzing about this. Eric, yes, that Eric, showed some personality! Unfortunately that personality includes such descriptors as "asshole-ish" and "somewhat homophobic". Joe and Bill aren't my two favourite racers either, but shouting "Freak freak freak!" at them was uncalled for. It wouldn't have been so bad if Eric hadn't then referred to them as "queens" in an interview seconds after this happened.
There is no need to like Joe and Bill (The Guidos), and the way they overreacted to Eric telling his driver to make it look like they were trying to pass them was ridiculous. I'm talking Mirna-level ridiculous here. But that's no excuse for homophobic insults, Mr. Nipple Rings Possibly Trying To Overcompensate For Something.
All of this overshadowed yet another big piece of news - the race finally left South America! Whoo hoo! From Argentina, the teams went all the way to Mozambique in Africa! With this being the All-Star season, it would have been nice to see them fit as many continents as possible, but now it's likely that either Europe or Asia will be skipped, damn it. Not only would have been nice to see the teams race through both, it would have been cool to see them have to go through Australia and Antarctica too. Australia is still a possibility, but considering how close they just were to Antarctica only to go in a completely different direction, that's not going to happen. A race through all seven continents really would have added to something calling itself "All-Stars".
Okay, that out of the way, before finding out they were leaving the country, the teams first had to find their clue. They took a lift up and hiked up to Marial Glacier, a glacier that looked pretty haggard and all melty-like. I won't get into global warming though, as I'll soon be getting preachy over something else.
After getting off the lift and before they started their hike, the teams had to grab backpacks what had avalanche beacons that they would use to find other beacons in the snow, and it was there where they would find their next clue.
It went fairly smoothly for most of the teams. Some had an easier time than others. One team, however, didn't read their whole clue before hiking to the glacier and so had to go all the way back to the lift to get their backpacks. Why must you break my heart like this, Kandice and Dustin? The Beauty Queens are a kickass team, but they keep making careless mistakes, something I hope all this extra hiking helped cure them of.
Fortunately Oswald and Danny were having a very hard time working out the beacon, so they were the last team to leave. You know, I wouldn't worry about being the last team to leave this early in a leg, because there's bound to be a time equalizer somewhere. Still, you don't want to take that chance either.
Okay, now the teams left for Africa, we got that unpleasantness between Eric and The Guidos, and yes, that part happened at a time equalizer anyway as they had to wait for a park to open so they could do their next task.
The Roadblock was cool and scary this week. Scary because thanks to war, Mozambique is littered with landmines, a deadly threat to its citizens, and especially its children. It kinda makes the whole "making a game of this" thing seem a little heartless. But if it helps to educate, that's a good thing. The cool part of it was the giant rats that are trained to search for landmines. How giant were these rats? Think of a small dog. Yeah, that big. Phil Keoghan was even cradling one in his arms as he was describing the task. If you have to cradle it in your arms, that's one monster rodent.
One of the teammates had to choose a rat and use it to find a deactivated mine, and there they would also find a race marker, which would get them their clue. Not taking a chance that the mines weren't properly deactivated, the racers only had to find it, some poor local would have to dig. To make this task easier, the rats were attached to strings and could only go back and forth in a straight line. Once they found the mine, they'd start digging. The racer would then say they believe the mine is there, their local help would go over it with a metal detector, and if correct, would start digging, praying fervently that their last day on Earth wouldn't be spent helping some American game show contestant win a million dollars.
For the most part, the racers were able to get through this task without incident. Some took a little longer than others, but the only one who really had a problem was Charla. Whether it was impatience, or if she was too busy getting righteously outraged over all the other rats daring to do better than hers, she wasn't paying enough attention and as the rat would start digging, she got it to move on. Not that it mattered for long, because one commercial break later, she finally noticed the rat digging, and they got their clue. It was nice to see this task end without any Mozambicans being blown up.
Now with everyone on the road again, it was time to go back to the town they started from, Maputo, find their next clue, and on to the Detour.
"Pamper or Porter?" The choice, as always, was between two tasks. The teams would either have to travel to a market and paint fingernails to try and raise 30 metecais (about one U.S. dollar), or they'd have to travel to another market, use their hands to fill ten 45-pound (about 20.4 kg) bags with coal then carry one of those bags to a specific address where the owner would hand them their next clue. I always wonder how the producers get some of these tasks set up, especially when they have to go to regular homes. Do they go to random houses and ask if they'd like a free bag of coal? The people who answer the doors, while having the clues, always seem to be a little surprised that this really is happening.
Phil let's us know something the racers aren't aware of... In Maputo, it's usually men who paint fingernails for pay. This led to every man in the race choosing to do the coal task, incorrectly believing that it might be harder for them to get customers.
The two all-female teams, however, went with the nails. Sure, it's usually men who do this in Maputo, but how often does one get the chance in Mozambique to have her nails coloured by a blonde little person and her cousin both talking in insulting accents? Not very often, my friends! Not very often. Heck, how often does one get that chance in Canada or the United States? Not very often, my friends!
So while the majority of the teams were digging through coal all hot and sweaty, Charla and Mirna pulled off a feat most thought impossible. They came in first. First they knock out Rob and Amber then they come in first? Up is down, black is white, Horatio Sanz is funny!
There is a downside to this, of course. They are still Charla and Mirna, so they're going to see this as a vindication of their self-righteous, hypocritical ways. God or karma saw to it that they won this leg as a reward for being such fantastically good people who know that any language barrier can be overcome as long as you use a horrible, patronizing accent!
But damn, if they aren't entertaining. I don't want to see them win, but I would like to see them make it to fourth or fifth place just because they make for good television.
The team I do want to see win, despite the mistakes they've made, came in second. Well done, Beauty Queens! They finally kicked the fourth place or lower habit they've developed this season. Now if only they can get a few first place finishes in. Or even just one where it really, really counts.
Now I said earlier that all the men chose to do the coal task. That doesn't mean all of them actually did it. Despite Ian wanting to do the coal, he and Teri got lost and wound up at the wrong market. Rather than waste time trying to find the correct one, they decided to do the fingernail polish despite Ian's trepidations. They managed to get two young ladies to agree to have their nails done for, what was to them, an obscenely expensive price. With that done, Teri and Ian headed to the Pit Stop and, much to their surprise, a third place finish.
That left all the coal diggers. Oswald and Danny were the first to finish, and when they got to the mat all filthy and covered in coal dust, Oswald gave us one of the greatest Amazing Race moments ever when he chased Phil around, trying to get a hug.
Joe and Bill came in next, leaving it a last place fight between Eric and Danielle and Joyce and Uchenna.
Eric and Danielle convinced some local kids to lead them to their address, while Joyce and Uchenna relied instead on their own uncanny sense of direction which allowed Captain Nipple Rings and Boobin to beat them to the mat.
So this was it for Uchenna and Joyce. That's okay, they've won before. They're not the team I wanted to see leave this week, but at least... what? It's a non-elimination leg!
Carrying over the non-elimination rule that first came into play last season, they got to keep all their money and belongings, but they are now marked for elimination. That means that unless Joyce and Uchenna come in first next week, they will incur a half-hour penalty and will not be allowed to check in until that half-hour is up. It's certainly possible, and I will be keeping my fingers crossed that Eric and Danielle get so lost that they fall a good 31 minutes behind everyone else. Then Joyce and Uchenna can be eliminated the week after that.

Grease: You're The One That I Want - Aired March 11

It's getting close to the end. This is the final week where the panel gets to save anyone, then we'll be to our final six and it's all up to the audience.
The musical number to start the night was "Grease" itself and it wasn't bad. Luckily these are just an opportunity for the group to perform together and we're not judging them on it.
We're also finding ourself back to having a guest panelist, and to grace us with his knowledge and experience was Rob Marshall, director of the screen version of "Chicago" (a fine movie) and brother of panelist Kathleen.
Before finding out who's in the bottom two, there was a quick video recap of the previous week, and strangely enough, all the Dannys want to win. Now we can breathe easy. I hate when you get a group of competitors all vying to lose.
Except for a dramatic pause, there weren't any games played this week. Austin and Chad were called out, and they were the bottom two. My first thought was "Derek's cracking voice just might win now!" My second was, this isn't good for Chad as he's been in the bottom more than Austin, who has never been there. But on the other hand, that could well be why they haven't let Austin go either, so we'll have to wait and see.
There is a theme for the songs again. The Sandys are all going to be showing their emotional sides, whereas the Dannys will all be doing Elvis. Nice, and very appropriate. The remaining women are all strong, so it would be strange to see any of them really falter. However, the men are still quite iffy, and if anyone is going to bring out the Danny Zuko in any of them, it's the King.
Allie - Oooh! "Natural Woman"! Great song if sung well. She did a very nice job on it, but not fantastic. As good as her voice is, it's probably the weakest of the three remaining women. She went for it though, and that helped a lot.
Derek - Singing "Devil in Disguise", this was the first time I could really see this John Stamos lookalike as Danny. It suited his voice, and I thought this was his strongest performance to date.
Something special the contestants got after each pairing was a video of friends and families, showing the people supporting them. It was kinda nice, and maybe just the shot in the arm each person needed to give them a little extra boost. Better than the anabolic steroids all of them are all taking.
Kidding.
Kathleen thought Allie sang better than she has been, and Derek showed confidence and charm. Rob said they were both fantastic, but now it's about being in character. Jim and David weren't allowed to say anything! I guess there was too much being squeezed into this hour.
Laura - "Don't Leave Me This Way". Laura wasn't my favourite going in, but she's been giving us one great performance after another, and this was yet another best of the night. If she doesn't win the role, it's not going to be her singing that cost her.
Max - I don't know. He sang "Suspicious Minds" and it just left me flat. He can do so much better than this, but on the other hand, he can do so much worse too.
Jim said he was virtually speechless, and it was a good thing he had that "virtually" qualifier, 'cause he kept on a-talkin'. What it all boiled down to is that neither of them were who most people would picture as Danny and Sandy in the beginning, but talent wins out. Rob thought he was looking at the next Sandy and Danny. David and Kathleen weren't allowed to say anything!
Everyone not in the bottom two then gave a performance of "All That Jazz" in honour of Rob Marshall, and sadly it just showed how superior the potential Sandys are to the potential Dannys. The women sizzled in this song, the men were somewhat lukewarm.
Now it was down to Austin and Chad and the Sing Off. Neither liked being in the bottom two, but dadgummit, they were going to fight!
But before singing for their lives, it was time for that weekly kick in the face. Austin, it turned out, had the lowest audience votes. I have to wonder about the wisdom of telling them this before the song.
The song was "Rock And Roll Party Queen", and Austin kicked Chad's butt. Chad wasn't strong in his performance at all, letting Austin's voice completely overwhelm him.
Kathleen got to give the good news/bad news this week, and they had decided to save Austin as he was seen as the better triple threat (singing, dancing, acting).
I don't mention the hosts very often as there is rarely much to say about them, but Denise Van Outen managed to out-annoy Billy Bush as she badgered Chad into saying which of the remaining men he'd pick to win, and so to shut her up he said Max.
Ashley - Our Meg Ryan lookalike sang "Keep Me Hanging On", and she did a strong job. My biggest criticism would be that it just wasn't bluesy enough, but she did give it a lot of emotion and she got much better in the middle of the song. The end part was only as good as the beginning.
If you're familiar with the song, you'll know there are parts where it goes "Whoa whoa whoa!" The first time she did this, it was a little lacklustre. The second time, right at the end, was much, much better. Basically the whole thing was inconsistent, but never bad.
Austin - He did a nice job singing "Can't Help Falling In Love", but I thought he did it a little too Broadway. We're supposed to be hearing Elvis, and he's performing Phantom.
David say they were both great. Ashley has a great voice, and was showing real passion, real emotion, and real acting. He sees her in the final two. He thought it was great to see emotion from Austin, and complimented his lovely baritone voice. He likes how professional he is, but wants to see him use more emotion and to let more of himself show through.
Rob thought both were so talented. He'd like to see them go on stage and show only Sandy, only Danny. Basically he just contradicted what David said what he'd like to see. Rob would have been interested to see them perform these songs as Sandy and Danny. Kathleen and Jim weren't allowed to say anything!
The favourites this week were Austin and Laura for Jim and David, and Max and Laura for Kathleen. Rob wimped out and said they were all fantastic.
Chad got to sing his goodbye song, "Sandy" as is the custom for the guys. He did an okay job, but nothing to make us wish he was still in the competition. His "Oh, Sandy!" at the end had to have been the lamest one yet, and it came out almost happy. No, it has to be full of longing! Yeah, it was okay that he left.
Now we're down to six, and there are no more Sing Offs and nobody can be saved by the panel. Next week, the bottom vote receivers are going home.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 11

The big question this week was, of course, would Surya's unsurpassed management brilliance bring him a third win as project manager?
While the women of Kinetic still like their former teammate, they'd much rather get the win themselves, and this time around it was Kristine's turn to step up, giving her more screen time in one episode than she's really had all season.
It didn't look good for her from the start. The task this week was to do a half-time promotion at a professional soccer match promoting GNC, a vitamin and nutritional supplement company. And as an aside, doesn't it make more sense that the rest of the world calls soccer "football", as there is a lot more connection between feet and the ball than there is in what we call football here? Anyway, the reason things didn't look good for Kristine is that she's done this sort of thing before, doing half-time promotions for an arena football team. Shouldn't that be a good thing? You'd think, but more often that not, when someone on The Apprentice says something is within their field of expertise, they find some way to horribly screw things up so I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen again.
Over on Arrow, driving in the vehicle after getting the assignment, Tim came up with the idea of a story based around a boxing match. Frank picked up on this and they started getting excited about the possibilities. Surya put a damper on their enthusiasm, saying it was a good idea but they should still try to think of others, resulting in rolled eyes and seething resentment.
Unfortunately for them, they didn't come up with anything better, so they went with the boxing.
Kristine's idea for the promotion was to have people dressed up as different vitamins run an obstacle course. I was thinking they should use their Olympic gold medalist somehow, but with a good enough show, they should be able to get by without doing this.
The biggest problem on Kinetic this week was Muna, who kept second-guessing Kristine and expressing concern over the plan, despite the project manager's experience doing these things. Nice try, executive producer Mark Burnett. Make us think that Kinetic might lose and Kristine would take Muna back into the boardroom with her. Classic misdirection.
Despite Muna's concerns, the Kinetic promotion went over smoothly. It was simple but fun, an easy message to get to the hundreds of soccer fans sitting in the stands. Yeah, people kept talking about the "15,000" fans at the game, but there didn't seem to be anywhere near that many watching this all happen. If there were 15,000 people in attendance, I'd hate to think what the lines at the bathrooms were like.
Arrow's show, however... Surya thought it went fantastically, but poor, poor man. It didn't. It was a confusing mess, and so his reign as project manager ended. Poor Surya.
When your goal is to win The Apprentice, you can't get a better reward than something that will let you get face time with the man who will make the final decision, and in this case Kinetic got to have a round of golf with The Donald, and some guy from some golf company who also provided the women each with a brand-new set of clubs. Sadly nobody made a fool of themselves desperately vying for Trump's attention.
I really would have liked it if someone had. As you might have noticed, this has been pretty short. It's not that this season is particularly bad, it's just not the best one we've seen.
The board room was fun. All of Arrow felt Surya should be fired, and he brought James in with him, someone he felt spent too much time covering his own ass, and Tim, who came up with the original boxing idea.
I'm not fond of seeing someone come up with an idea unless all other things are equal, and even then, it boils down to it being the project manager's approval that lets a bad idea go through, so Tim was safe. It came down to Surya's inability to lead this team against James' butt covering, and James did wait until it was way too late to voice his discomfort with the boxing idea. Yes, if you think something's a bad idea, cover your ass, but do so early enough in the process so that things can be changed if necessary. Better still, come up with a decent idea of your own. If nobody accepts it, fine, but at least you tried. That way you have something to really back yourself up with in the board room. With James, it just didn't look good the way he approached it.
There has been criticism that Surya was too repetitive with his points in the board room. He kept repeating his 5-2 record (which includes him as just a team member as well as a PM), but repeating points can often help. He fought hard, and managed to get Tim to admit to James having flaws and covering his ass, even though he still felt Surya should be fired.
But before we get to that, it's time for our weekly feature...
How Did The Winning Project Manager Compare to Heidi?
During the first two weeks of this process, Heidi set the bar for the winning PM and how they do sitting next to Trump in the losing team's board room, and nobody has come close. I'd like to say that Kristine succeeded, but she hardly said a thing. Granted, it would be hard to get a word in the way Surya and James were both defending themselves loudly and repeatedly. It took Trump asking her if she had anything to ask for her to say anything. She did ask a decent question, and she managed to look comfortable there (something not everyone was able to pull off). Heidi is still the champion though.
So Surya was fired, which was no surprise. He was holding his own and possibly even turning the tide in his favour, but then he made the mistake of going too far. He said that with this team in particular, he functions best when he isn't the leader. That so isn't want Trump wants to hear. If you ever, EVER want to be The Apprentice, do not admit to there being any conceivable situation where you couldn't be a leader!
Once the room cleared, The Donald did say he liked how hard Surya fought to stay, something James and Tim both agreed on as they stood watching Surya being driven away. Ah, some respect. Too little, too late, but it was respect. That's always nice to see.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 11

It's episodes like this one that make me wish I was recapping Amazing Race instead of just commenting on it, there was so much juiciness in it (but due to technical difficulties, recapping a show that isn't a talent competition isn't possible). This episode also managed to turn my own competitive reality world upside down. For the first time in two seasons of this show and one season of Survivor, I actually liked Amber. I know she was in another season of Survivor, but I still can't remember her from it.
And it's not just that. I've even softened towards Boston Rob. Damn it, how ironic is it that I've started liking Romber now, this episode of all episodes?
After finishing first yet again at the last pit stop, they were the first to leave on this leg. They would never see first place again, except for in my heart for a short time.
It wasn't like they didn't get off to a good start. At one point, there was a good two hour difference between the teams in the front and the two teams in the back who couldn't get on the first flight, giving those that arrived at the Detour first a pretty decent head start.
The options at the Detour were pretty simple. Sign It or Navigate It. Build a signpost, correctly spelled and in proper order, detailing the stops Magellan took on his historic trip around the world, or follow a simple map to find a man dressed as a sailor, get a compass from him, and follow that directly south.
The map option seemed the easiest to me, but not all the teams took it. Rob and Amber (well, Rob) chose the signpost because Rob builds things, Joyce and Uchenna chose it as well, as did Team Realivision who, though we do love Kandice and Dustin, have their issues with directions and thus this did seem like the better choice.
Speaking of the Beauty Queens, and we always do, they've realized that they haven't been kicking as much ass as they did last season. Part of this problem is that they've been overthinking everything. As soon as I heard that, I knew the haters would have a field day despite it being true. It happened on this task as well. Instead of just doing it as stated on the clue, they started to wonder if all the little signs on the post had to be pointing in the proper direction to the different locations (they didn't). That ate up a lot of time, of course.
While the teams who chose the signpost task worked away at it, the teams that chose the map and compass finished quickly and started heading to their next location where they had to get spots on a charter plane.
Rob was the first at the signpost task to get the correct starting location for Magellan, and he and Amber did well with getting their post finished, but it turns out that Romber has a weakness after all. Spelling. I've no doubt while watching this episode and seeing the camera keep showing us that they spelled "Phillipines" as "Philipeans", they must have fallened to their knees, rending their clothes and shouting, "Curse our semi-literateness!" Why it never occurred to them to double check their spelling against the map they had to copy from after they were first told by the judge that they didn't have it right is beyond me.
Uchenna and Joyce were able to finish their sign correctly after one misstep where they started the voyage at Guam instead of Seville, Spain, the only team on this Detour who were able to do so, and they headed off to their next destination.
Team Realivision were keeping an eye on clock and realized that the two teams behind them would be landing shortly, so they proposed to team up with Rob and Amber to give up on this task and try the navigation.
Normally I'd advise against joining up with the Beauty Queens on any tasks that involve directions, but at this point there was no real choice. I don't know why they didn't change tasks earlier, something Amber tried to convince Rob to do but he stubbornly refused.
So they headed off, but still struggled. As they were trying to find the sailor, Joe and Bill ("the Guidos", a team name I don't understand) showed up and passed them. Ouch. Luckily Mirna and Charla decided to do Sign It, which resulted in Charla trying to carry supplies while Mirna screamed at her. Of course, if Charla didn't try to help, Mirna would have screamed at her. If we were to get to see what goes on at the Pit Stop, I'm sure we'd be treated to Mirna screaming at Charla there. "THAT'S MY SANDWICH! DON'T TOUCH MY SANDWICH, CHARLA! GO GET YOUR OWN! I NEED SOME MILK, COME WITH ME, CHARLA! HURRY! HURRY! STOP EATING THOSE CHIPS SO LOUDLY!"
That Mirna is such a delight.
Meanwhile, back at Navigate It, the Guidos got their clue and our little alliance of Romber and the Beauty Queens got their compasses. However, instead of following the directions, they decided to keep using the map.
Dustin and Kandice, you know I love you, but your sense of direction is going to kill me before this season is over. But if anyone's going to mess up "head straight south" while they've got a compass in their hand...
So, let's look at what did in Rob and Amber this episode. Stubborness, spelling, and teaming with the Beauty Queens when directions are important.
By this point in the race, it was safe to bed that Rob and Amber were going to miss first place for the first time this season. But were things going so bad that they'd get eliminated?
Rob wasn't used to being this far behind, and he wasn't happy having to take the later charter flight. Unlike those racers who are ecstatic when they have to take the later plane, bus, train, boat, or horse-drawn carriage.
Next stop - the end of the world. Teams had to travel to the southern most tip of Argentina, which just so happens to be the southern most tip of South America. To be so close to penguins, yet so far...
The clues weren't done yet. Racers had to find the clue box that would lead them to boats that would take them to the Road Block. It was here that I finally liked Amber. She and Rob overshot the clue box, and Mirna and Charla followed right behind them. Nothing new there. However, when they realized they must have missed it, Romber turned around and with their last clue still in their hands, Amber said "Got it!" as they walked past Team Undermedicated. Mirna suspected a lie, because she's allegedly an attorney and is used to people lying. This threw me for a loop. Somewhere, somehow, Mirna practices law? The hilarious images that brings forth are highly entertaining, including how often she must have been jailed for contempt of court for screaming at judges. And really, should a lawyer be getting high and mighty about other people not living up to the moral code she expects in people who aren't her?
It got even better at the pier. Charla went up to Amber and asked why she lied (because it's a friggin' game, dumbass, and they don't want to be in last place). Amber told her she was talking to Rob, and when she said "Got it!" she meant that she realized where the clue box was. Lovely.
Joyce and Uchenna went down a little in my book though. Before Charla and Mirna arrived at the pier, they were laughing as much as anyone else at the "Got it!" lie, but afterwards they got almost as sniffy about it as Team Undermedicated.
The Road Block this leg was the ever-popular needle in a haystack kind of challenge. One member of each team had to sort through a huge bag of mail of 1600 envelopes to find one of two letters addressed to them, then read the letter which was from a team from their original season. The team would then have to search the island for the Pit Stop where someone may be eliminated. It seems a little early for a non-elimination leg, but this is All-Stars. You never know what they might pull (like never getting out of South America until the final leg, but with everyone this far south, I'd really love to see the race go through Antarctica).
Oswald and Danny got through the envelopes and to the mat to become the first non-Romber team of the season to get first place. After that, the only thing to note outside of Rob/Amber/Charla/Mirna was that the Beauty Queens got a letter from one of the members of their biggest rivals last season, Lyn from Alabama. Her teammate was either unable or unwilling to put the anger behind her, proving that Lyn was the more reasonable half of that team (which was pretty obvious while watching). Anyway, that was pretty cool.
Rob and Amber and Charla and Mirna weren't quite so lucky. Their letters were quite hateful, and there's no need for that. Once the season is over, let go of the hate. Rob and Amber are just very competitive and aren't above sabotaging other players, but hey, it is a game. If Charla and Mirna were as insane their first time out, that would explain their hateful missive. It's bad enough to be the bottom two teams, but to get this kick in the teeth too?
I don't know why Charla didn't do this Roadblock as it wasn't particularly physical and if they defy the odds and stay around for several more legs, she should end up having to do a task that doesn't suit her physical limitations. There isn't much in the way of strategy in The Amazing Race, but when it comes to Road Blocks where only one team member can compete and each person has to do half the tasks, if one team member is more physically capable, use the other on tasks that aren't so physical. But on the other hand, Mirna did finish this task before Rob, giving her and her cousin a head start to the mat. Enough of a head start, it turned out.
As much as I finally started to like Rob and Amber for the first time, it was still pretty fun to see them get beat by an insane lawyer and her little person cousin. I may not like Charla and Mirna, but they are damned entertaining and it would be great to see them beat Eric and Danielle next, the most boring team left this season. At least in his first season, Eric had Jeremy as his partner and the homoerotic subtext of that team and they way they tried to hide it by talking about girls all the time helped make them fun. And he was part of the team that called and cancelled other people's cabs! This Eric isn't like that! Now the most entertaining thing about him is wondering when we'll get to see his pierced nipples next!
Oh, Rob and Amber. From three straight first place finishes to eliminated in their worst place finish in any of their shows. Now they'll have to go back to struggling on one of their other 30 or so reality shows and living off of Amber's Survivor: All-Stars winnings.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 8

Last week it was all about the idiots, and there was more of that this week, but there was also some sexism (which is just a form of idiocy in itself) and even some glimmerings of intelligence from some people who realized that there is more to Survivor than the challenges.
While there is still nobody to really get behind and cheer on, at least those with the glimmerings are giving us people we'd rather see over some of the other horrible players this season, and oh, there are some horrible players.
Due to their domination in every competition, we haven't met too much of Moto, but we finally got to learn what a wonderful bunch of loveable winners they really are. Of the seven people left in their tribe, five are in an alliance, leaving two in the wilderness. Alex did the math and realized that if they merge at ten people, "Dreamz" and Cassandra could well join the remaining Ravu members, tying the numbers at five and five. Oooh, good catch. The problem is, his alliance is comprised mostly of jerks. Yes, I'm keeping my language clean for you, my PG readers. Yes, those jerks were treating "Dreamz" and Cassandra like poo. We see it time and again, an alliance gets a numbers advantage and the power goes to their heads, but rarely does it seem to get as dehumanizing as this. At most, those in the minority are left to do more than their share of work, but what we saw here was beyond ridiculous.
The worst offenders appeared to be Lisi and Stacy, though "Boo" was getting his fair share of assholeness in with those two. Really, would it have killed them to let Cassandra have better than just the coffee grounds?
With the possibility of "Dreamz" and Cassandra joining forces with the remaining Ravuites, perhaps, just maybe, possibly they should consider treating those two a little better. Edgardo agreed, but the other three showed a complete lack of forsight and saw no reason to do this. Putting the game aside, and how often do I do this, but an even better reason to treat them better is that they are human beings, and it would do one well in life to realize this and show some humanity. "Why should we start treating them well?" Because, if nothing else, you're showing yourselves to be assholes on international television.
So good job figuring out the numbers, Alex and Edgardo, but you started to lose me when some sexism crept into your discussion. They called "Boo" stupid, but said that Lisi and Stacy were being "irrational", because that's how women are, you know. If they called all three stupid, or all three irrational, I'd be fine with it. But when it's just the women being described with a word that's been used to belittle women's intelligence for centuries, well you kinda start to lose me.
Well, here's a bit of irrationality coming from a woman - just being nice to the two outcasts isn't going to do a bit of good now. Nobody wants to play for sixth and seventh place. Before you started being assholes, you should have been making "Dreamz" and Cassandra feel like they were equal parts of your tribe and your alliance. Even if Lisi, Stacy, and "Boo" bought into the idea that treating human beings as human beings might be a decent (in both of its common definitions) idea, it's too late to make a difference. I'd know that even if "Dreamz" didn't tell us that he and Cassandra were planning on going to Ravu as soon as the merge happens.
I want to see Moto lose a challenge, and that's got nothing to do with all of this, and it's certainly nothing to do with wanting to see Ravu, the not-so-plucky underdogs winning. I'm just tired of seeing Moto walk away with everything.
In the immunity challenge, it almost happened. Not so much the reward challenge where it wasn't even close. They had to pair up against each other, and with big cushions, knock their opponents off a platform into some mud, first to seven points wins. "Rocky" called out "Dreamz", only to have him knock him off in a matter of seconds. The only Ravu tribe member to win in their round was Yau-Man, who knocked off Stacy. And so Moto got their third set of fishing gear, some potatoes, the aforementioned coffee, and some toiletries. and Ravu got nothing.
Despite all we've seen at Moto, it was likely that Ravu was going to go to Tribal Council again because we saw too much of them too. Anthony has been on the edge of being voted out for a while now, but someone new has been getting under "Rocky's" skin. Rita. You see, it turns out Rita likes to talk, and when she talks, it's all about somewhat shallow girly stuff, and this drove "Rocky" crazy. You see, when he's having conversations with people, it's all about the economic ramifications of the Kyoto accord vs. the imminent threat of global warming on Earth's delicate biosphere and the non-renewable nature of fossil fuels. Or at least that's what you'd assume from how affronted he was by Rita's assault on his ears. I strongly suspect his conversation rarely veers from cars, sports, and boobies, but I wouldn't say that because that would be stereotyping and that's just wrong.
Week after week, the most negative influence in the Ravu tribe has been "Rocky". I don't get how they're not voting him out yet. It's obvious that this tailoring for strength thing hasn't been working (especially when they're voting out Erica over Yau-Man because she got frustrated in one challenge). They should be trying something different and getting the negativity out of camp, and "Rocky" is the place to start for that.
Sure enough Ravu lost the immunity challenge. They managed to get within one point of winning their first competition but managed to blow it as always. The most frustrating part is that they should have won! It was basically an oversized version of Concentration, you know, where you have cards or other images turned face down and you have to match pairs by remembering what is where. In this version, it was all numbers and words turned over. Near the end, most of the pairs were matched up, and there were a few dummy choices where there weren't pairs, but enough was turned over that it should have been very easy to remember what was where. "Okay, they just turned over a 9, and it was between that one and that one, five over from the side." Easy, right? Sure, if you're not a member of Ravu.
Well, there was some jockeying for votes back at camp and there seemed be enough of a majority to vote off Anthony, but this wouldn't be Survivor: Fiji if they voted off a man while there are still women left in the tribe. Of course it was Rita's turn! If Michelle is shocked about leaving next week (no spoiler, it's pure guesswork based on voting patterns), she will obviously not have been paying attention.
This is five women in a row voted off. I've no doubt that's a Survivor record. I don't even have to double check it, that's how sure I am. Other Survivor records this season include the longest the hidden immunity idol has gone without being found, and of course the most challenge losses in a row by any one tribe. Even Ulong in Palau won a couple of rewards, their first in episode two. Heck, judging by the previews of the next episode, I wouldn't doubt the producers have invoked what they might call "the Palau Contingency", a mixing of the tribes if one is overpowering the other and winning all the immunities.
Something else of note. There hasn't been a single unanimous vote at tribal council yet (and when I say "unanimous", I mean everyone except the person going home). Michelle should be particularly concerned, because not only is she the last woman on Ravu, but she's also the only one other than Rita who voted for Anthony.

Survivor won't be on next week. It will be returning Wednesday, March 21, so don't miss it.

Grease: You're The One That I Want - Aired March 4

Last week it was the Sandys all to themselves, this week it's the Dannys, and with the less talented of the two groups performing, you know it's going to be a great time for everyone. I would also like to let you know the sacrifice I've been making for this blog.
I'm currently able to only record one show and watch another. Grease is on at the same time as The Amazing Race here. They are both also on at the same time as The Simpsons, which has been airing new episodes. Yes, I'm recording friggin' Grease: You're The One That I Want instead of new Simpsons episodes! What kind of monster has this blog made of me?!? This show entertains me, but really, this is too much.
But I will stick it out to the bitter end, despite Billy Bush! If you watch The Office (and really, if you don't, why aren't you?) you'll be very familiar with how cringe-inducing Michael's attempts at jokes are, and it's that cringe-worthiness that's funny. Not with Billy Bush. When he tries to be funny, you just cringe. I even wrote down in my notes, "Billy Bush still an idiot." I can't even remember what he said, just that it was worthy of that note.
My bellyaching aside, let's get to the show.
The opening number was "Greased Lightning" with some horribly cleaned up language.
"You know without a doubt we'll be really makin' out in Greased Lightning!"
Yeah, it's American network television (language restrictions are much more relaxed in Canada, where The Sopranos aired on broadcast television uncut (though at least you guys make great shows like The Office and The Simpsons, and we make Corner Gas)), but that was still lame.
The one thing about watching this number is it became very clear that there are no John Travoltas amongst the remaining Dannys, or even any Jeff Conaways. He played Kenickie in the movie. There is more raw sexuality in an episode of Spongebob Squarepants than there was on stage this night. But that's just me. The audience full of screaming 14-year-old girls loved it, and hooo boy, they were screaming.
What has become one of my favourite parts of the show is the videos where we get to see egos on display and the contestants smacktalking each other. Usually it's all about how everyone is friends and we all love one another, so this makes for a nice change. Apparently Chad is really talked about poorly by the rest of the guys!
No! No gossip here! Even though it's still fun to see. Tee hee!
Oh, and the panel is three people again, and there were absolutely no special guests this week. It's possible word about the show has gotten around, and nobody wants to work with Billy Bush.
Austin - It seems that all the guys have things they've had to work on, and for Austin, it was loosening up and allowing himself to be more comedic. So he went to the Groundlings theatre with some of the Sandys (who seemed to go with most of the guys on these excursions) where he got some lessons from one of the members of that troupe.
His song this week was "Fun Fun Fun", and it was anything but. Yes, he was trying, but he was trying too hard and left me flat. The screamers enjoyed it, but that's because they enjoy a man twice their age on stage in a too-tight shirt dancing around. Hell, we've all been there, and I'm sure I'm not alone in going to a motel with the guy.
David had fun looking at the Sandys who were dancing with Austin, like we really believe David looks at women (I kid, he's married with two children). He's still not convinced with Austin, and wants to see more of a twinkle in his eye. Jim said it felt forced, but he too was partially distracted by the women (which I believe, because he's been lusting after the Sandys since the season premiere). Kathleen disagreed with them, which makes me wonder about her judging abilities now. She said she thought it was great and that he was loose and goofy. She loves his attack and energy.
Derek - After the huge crack in his song two weeks ago, his trip was to a vocal therapist to avoid that happening again.
He sang "Heaven", the Bryan Adams song, and I liked his performance even though there was a hint of a crack in it again at one point, but not as horrifying as the previous time.
Kathleen said Derek redeemed himself, but he needs to show a more unpredictable side. Jim said it was a solid performance, though he questioned if he heard a crack or if it was just Derek's song styling. David said it was definitely a crack, and thought the approach to the song was safe and boring. He needs to work on his vocals, something David sees as a worry.
Max - Max's goal was to work on his physicality, and to do this, he went to a gym and spent some time in a boxing ring. Unfortunately he didn't do any actual sparring, as that would have livened things up somewhat. It was entertaining to hear the pseudo-Rocky music. It was close enough to invoke the music of the movie, but they didn't have to pay for the rights. Everyone wins!
He sang "Hard To Handle", and it was easily one of the best "rock" performances of the series. It still wasn't completely believable rock and roll, but it was enough to make this the performance of the night.
Oh yeah. This is where Billy Bush said, "Crummbelievable!" I'll leave you to ponder that one for a moment.




David was impressed. "Wow, what a transformation!" Yes, Max has an "unconventional look" (a nice way of saying, "not very attractive"), but he has pure talent and he hopes Broadway can accept him as the next sex symbol. Out with it, David! Just call him a horrifying mutant who can sing and dance! You know you want to!
Jim said it's been building with Max, and yes, he has lots of talent. He loved the performance. Kathleen thought it was fun to see him strut and sneer, and she sees him more and more each week as a Danny Zuko.
Chad - His issue was trying to fill a theatre with his presence, so he used Shakespeare and a UCLA professor to help them with that. It helped that Chad's the best actor of the remaining Dannys, something we know because he told us so.
He sang "Don't Stop Me Now", and I liked it. It was the second best performance of the night, I thought anyway. But then I also think Chad looks like a young Donny Osmond, but without the 70s hair.
Kathleen saw a leading man, but he was vocally in and out and she wants to see him make the songs more his own. Jim thinks he's too pretty looking (having struck out with the Sandys, Jim seems to have moved on to the Dannys), so he needs to toughen up. Maybe if they cut his face or something. Yes, that's what he said and I found it quite funny. Certainly funnier than anything Billy has said all season. David said it wasn't the greatest vocal performance, but that pretty looking guy would sell millions of tickets. Yeah, because "pretty" outsells "talent" all the time on Broadway.
Oh. Maybe it does. It certainly works a lot in Hollywood.
Because there was no special guest this week, there was time for some more video, and we got a look into what a week is like for the contestants. Despite my snarking, they do work hard to get ready for each Sunday. On Monday mornings they get an envelope with the song they're to perform, which they have to learn and practise. On Wednesday they have a vocal coach and a choreography coach. There are also the wardrobe fittings, which in itself takes time away from rehearsing their songs and choreography. Show days are the most hectic of the lot. That may not sound like much, but getting ready to perform a number on live, national television as well as learning the opening number? All that rehearsing is where all the hardest work is.
Finally we came to the bottom two. Who would it be this week? Kathleen and Allie, that's who, making it three weeks in a row for Kathleen. If this was based on votes along, Allie would be the one to go home.
With no time to compose themselves, it was right on to the song, "Raining On Prom Night". The song itself, one of my favourites on the Grease soundtrack, is a little silly in its lyrics, but it works best when the singer approaches it seriously, which is why I liked Allie's version better than Kathleen's, though they both have strong, beautiful voices.
There was a commercial, and when we came back we got to see how the two of them reacted to being in the bottom two, but that's pretty much the same thing every week. The panel was polled as to who they thought the best Danny was this week, and Max was the unanimous choice.
Then David had to do the dirty work. The woman he was about to save was Jim and Kathleen's choice, not his, but the one staying was Allie.
I liked Kathleen, but it will be nice to not have to distinguish between Judge Kathleen and Contestant Kathleen anymore. She has a great voice and lots of potential, so there is no reason she can't have a career on stage.
As has become customary now, we heard another touching version of "Look At Me, I'm Sandra Dee (Reprise)" when Kathleen sang her last song. I have to think that it's a combination of the real emotion they're feeling combined with the relaxation of not having to compete, but this has been one of the best songs the Sandys have been singing for a few weeks now.
They've also been working closely enough that we're starting to see more tears coming from the remaining Sandys too, which adds to the poignancy of this number.
But damn it, I'm still missing The Simpsons for this.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 4

Did you know that Donald Trump has been appearing on WWE Raw? He's going to be at Wrestlemania with his chosen wrestler going up against Vince McMahon's chosen wrestler. The winner gets to shave the loser's head. Does anyone really think that Trump would allow his head to be shaven? It would be interesting to see.
More interesting than this episode was shaping up to be, but then things happened to make it one of the most unusual Apprentices yet.
After winning the task last week, Surya got to stay on as project manager of Arrow, demonstrating how that twist can completely skew everything this season. You can be sure his team isn't happy about this, but what can they do? Deliberately blow a task? Too risky. This is one twisted twist. Keep winning, the project manager gets most of the credit. Deliberately lose, you stand a good chance of going.
Of course, you could end up going just because you said the wrong thing. More on that soon.
Over on Kinetic, Jenn wanted to take her turn managing the team. After everything that happened last week, she wanted to step up to the challenge as most people do and should after they're brought into the boardroom after a loss and manage to survive.
Derek was please with Aimee being fired last time, and he felt that all they needed to do now is get rid of last of the "riff-raff" who just so happens to have been Jenn. With that done, then their team would truly excel.
The task this week was to create a special owner experience for the newest model Lexus. Simple enough, one would think.
Kinetic was struggling for ideas. They came up with the theme, "Come Experience Your Sixth Sense of Luxury," but nothing beyond that. Angela was put in charge of creativity though the whole team was brainstorming. Hey! I know! Instead of a "sixth sense of luxury", how about a "gold medal experience" and use your Olympic gold medallist to sell the idea of excellence? Instead, they come up with a magician (not bad, if done correctly (so of course it wasn't)), and go-karts. Yes, go-karts. Derek threw it out as an idea, as people do in brainstorming sessions, and Jenn jumped on it despite everyone else on the team - including Derek - hating it.
Here's the thing... You don't always need activities, especially when it's going to be nothing but adults there. I may be wrong, but I suspect they'd be able to go an afternoon without playing. Oh, I'm sure in most people's minds Lexus equals go-karts, but unless they're gold-plated and chauffeur-driven, they're not likely going to go over too well here.
As for Arrow, well, I don't know and I don't care what they were up to. Surya was driving them crazy, the rest were doing stuff, the two what's-their-faces were romancing, blah blah blah. They had a spiffy looking presentation with lots of luxury balloons and luxury foods in a luxurious setting, and other than a car battery dying from overuse, everything went rather well with nobody seemingly getting bored with no activities.
Andrea and Derek at Kinetic were having trouble with signage, Andrea particularly not being able to make up her mind and the deadline coming and going. This was a disaster in the making, so we have a very good idea of who is likely going to be going back in the board room (as soon as Jenn settled on go-karts, you know they were heading there). Fortunately for them, despite missing the deadline for guaranteed sign delivery, the signs did arrive in time, but they weren't of the standard they were hoping for.
Oh dear. Without fully luxurious signs, how were they going to spiff up their luxuriious crappy ass tents with the luxurious go-kart track outside? And don't even get me started on the luxurious magician! Hey, at least the luxurious magician didn't appear to work blue, making him a better choice than the comedian someone whose name I forget hired a season or two back (who was okay as a comedian, but she was entirely inappropriate for the audience).
Yes, it was all crappy ass luxury, compared to Arrow who had an event that lived up to what we'd expect to see, though why they didn't have pony rides and a petting zoo is beyond me. Anyway, chalk up another win for Surya, the project manager of the season!
It wasn't all bad for certain members of Kinetic. When talking to the Lexus executives, Trumpipoo asked if anyone on the team stood out, and they said that Heidi and Muna were both stars and their product knowledge was amazing. That was a sigh of relief, as they seemed so over the top in their acquiring of that knowledge that for a moment it seemed like they may have been the ones destined for the board room. I guess when it comes to product knowledge, if you're hoping to sell the product, there is no such thing as too much.
Despite the glowing words from the executives, Donaldkins asked Heidi what had happened to her, going from a superstar to being on a team that's losing too often. This lead to more glowing words from her teammates who made it very clear that Heidi was in no way responsible for the loss and that in her assigned area, she excelled.
She really needs another shot at project manager, but there are people on her team who haven't had a chance yet, so it's not likely going to happen yet.
Seeing that we're already on the subject of Heidi, let's do our weekly comparison of the winning PM's boardroom ability to that standard set by Heidi the first two weeks.
Honestly, I wasn't even sure Surya was there at first until we got a good camera angle. Trump even got to the point where he asked him if he was going to say anything at all, prompting Surya to spout out a question. Interestingly, the previous Apprentice winner who was Donald's eyes and ears this week was old Squidward himself, Randall (or is it Randal? I don't care, because he was the one who didn't want to share the spotlight with Rebecca a couple of seasons back, the last time there were two clear choices for the title) spoke a little too much, and Trump asked him to be quiet at one point so he could say something. Ha! You should have said yes to Rebecca!
I like the idea of the winning PM being in the boardroom, but I'm wishing there was more turnover in the position now so we could see how more people handle it.
Talking to the losing team, The Donald was asking Derek a question, I can't remember what, when Derek referred to himself as "white trash". Trump did not like this, and he doesn't want anyone working for him who refers to themselves like that, even if they're joking, so he fired Derek right there.
Dang. And there was still a good 10 minutes left, which means it was likely someone else was going to go. We've seen double and even quadruple firings before, but it's always at the same time. It's never like that. Derek took it good naturedly, hey, it's only The Apprentice and it's not like any of these people are hurting for money going in as they tend to be fairly successful before being selected.
You know what? That would be an awesome season of The Apprentice. Instead of taking people who are already successful, take a group of intelligent hard workers who, for whatever reason, haven't been particularly successful. People who would be very hungry for this opportunity. Now that would be a season worth watching. Granted, the job at the end couldn't have as much responsibility, but give them something that would be better than anything they've done before and would give them the chance to learn skills that would vastly improve their employability.
Anyway, once Derek was gone, there was some apprehension in the room. What just happened? Is this over? Can we go now? Well, it wasn't over yet. Trumpster had more to say and more to ask. When he wondered who Jenn was going to going to bring with her, she wanted Andrea and, unfortunately, Derek. They were the creative staff and she saw it as their fault that they lost. She may have succeeded in saving her butt if she hadn't been so insistant on the go-karts. How can she ever enjoy them again, knowing they cost her this "job interview"?
Yeah, Jenn was fired. One thing the rest of her team wanted Trump and her to know was that they respect her, they just think she didn't do a good job on this task. After she was fired, Muna made sure she knows they respect her. It was okay though, Jenn took the firing very well. It's nice to see people realize they're only on a competitive reality show competing for a chance to work for Donald Trump. Unlike Aimee's ouster last week, this one ended with smiles and hugs and good wishes.
Wait a minute! No, that's not nice! Damn it, this is The Apprentice!
Next week we'd better see some anger and bile again.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 4

On Survivor this season, I haven't been able to find anyone I want to cheer for. That is normally a bad thing, but at least there's nobody giving me a heart attack every week, Kandice and Dustin! You know I love their spirit, how they won't flinch at any of the challenges (Danielle!) and few people seem to have as much fun running this race as them. Their sense of direction, however, is truly horrifying. I get the sense though that it's more that they're not taking their time to make sure they're taking the right turn or looking for the signs they need to find.
It was a wrong turn that did them in last time. Don't be surprised to see it happen again if they don't win the race. If anyone can beat Rob and Amber. I know it's in them though. The Beauty Queens were the team who beat the Fast Forward last season!
Charla and Mirna. Huh. Their insanity and hypocrisy apparently knows no bounds. I love this team if for no other reason then that they're so freakin' crazy, and that makes for entertaining television! This leg their feud with Dustin and Kandice seems to have died down, and instead one started with Teri and Ian, particularly at an airport ticket counter. Teri and Ian (or Teran) were talking to the agent when Mirna butted in and asked him to help them, sparking off a big argument between the two teams. Mirna was clearly in the wrong here, but she and her cousin are so vastly morally superior to many of the other teams, so it didn't matter because their moral superiority automatically makes it right. I think. Hypocrisy is so confusing!
But dang it if they don't give us some great moments. They wanted to get a local man to show them directions, but he had to go to work. So they offered him $50 and dragged him to their car, and Teri and Ian said they would spit the money with them. Mirna said they'd better, and not screw them like the Beauty Queens did (who, for the record, made no such money-splitting deal). Once in the car and driving away, Charla welcomed this poor man into their scary world.
But it doesn't end there! Mirna picking up fish at the Road Block? Wonderfully nutty! Danielle's histrionics got all the attention, but Mirna was freaking out too. Whichever one of Team Guido, Joe or Bill, who did the Road Block didn't write down the full clue, something Mirna (foolishly) corrected them on, giving them the part they missed. She then spent the rest of the leg getting pissed off whenever the Guidos tried beating them to the pit stop. And then there was the Detour! After completing the white water rafting (during which Charla's face was priceless), they got to their car but couldn't find their keys. Figuring they must be at the tent they were changing in, Mirna started running back and she screamed at Charla to hurry up and come with her, because you know how important it is to have two people run back to a tent to fetch keys. And the local guy was still with them! With all the people racers have picked up and dropped off over the seasons, I wonder how many of them are still out there wandering lost, trying to get home. Nothing beats the woman who used one team (was it the Weavers in Family Edition?) to get a ride to work. That was fantastic.
Speaking of Teri and Ian, I never saw their original season, but this week I became a fan. No, it wasn't the argument with Mirna, as great as that was (and Ian calling for security was gold). No, it was when Teri went overboard on the whitewater raft. It gave us one of the best commercial cliffhangers ever on the show, even though we knew she'd survive (if anyone ever dies on a competitive reality show, there'd be massive controversy if the network decides to air it). But it was still nerve-wracking for the audience and very scary for Ian. She'd survive, but that doesn't mean she wouldn't get hurt badly enough to have to drop out of the race.
Aaaaand... She's safe! Holding on to the rope tied around the raft, Teri's head poked up no worse for wear! It turns out she actually enjoyed the experience and called it "a rush". That's when I became a fan.
Who I'm not a fan of this season is David and Mary. Well, Mary. David is too quiet to say anything to turn people against him. I don't know if we were supposed to feel sorry when she was crying about missing the Cho brothers this season, but these are all people who know that in the end, they are running the race for themselves, not some couple from Kentucky. She thought they were friends with Charla and Mirna, and she's still carrying a grudge that they had the audacity to pass them... in a race. She appreciates the chance to have this amazing experience twice, but I'm still not sure she's quite got a grip on what show she's on. Mary would fit in quite well with the Moto tribe on Survivor: Fiji, who are under the mistaken impression that they're spending 39 days at a luxury resort.
The tasks this week were fun. At the Road Block, one team member had to schlep some 80 flounders between one tank and another, and once done their clues were at the bottom of the tanks. This was how Team Guido missed part of their clue, the guy didn't write everything down. Danielle and Mirna both freaked over the fish, as mentioned earlier. This challenge even slowed down one of the stronger teams, Oswald and Danny, as Danny (I think, who pays attention to these things?) was having trouble with the sheer physicalness of the task.
The Detour, oh, the Detour. The choices were both team members climbing a forty foot cliff to get half the clue each, or taking a whitewater rafting trip to get the clue. Apparently one or two teams started trying the climbing, but this never aired so it likely didn't affect any rankings. All the teams wound up doing the rafting, which gave us moments like Teri's near-drowning and Charla's look of terror. The Beauty Queens had huge smiles on their faces doing this task, and why not? They somehow managed to move past several people!
Because they missed the Detour clue.
Damn.
This team is going to be the cause of a cardiac episode for me, just wait and see.
Kandice and Dustin missed the turn that would have taken them to the clue, because that's how they roll, but somehow managed to find the take off point for the whitewater rafting. The entire time they kept looking for the Detour clue, and at the end were surprised to find a clue that didn't have a Detour. Now normally this would be a mistake that would entail a lot of derision, but things have been shaken up in the race before, and this being the All-Star season, who knows what the producers might pull? And I like them, so I'm going to be biased. So there. Nyah.
When they arrived at the Pit Stop, Phil greeted them and let them know they arrived in fourth place, but... Oh, crap. What would happen? Time penalty? No. He couldn't check them in until they retrieved all the clues! Oh, crap! Not only did they have to go all the way back to find the clue, they were being presented with all new opportunities to get lost!
There was nothing they could do though but go back and retrieved the missing clue. How far behind were the rest of the teams? After driving back and forth who knows how many kilometres (I am Canadian, don't forget), they finally had all their clues and got back to the mat for Phil to officially pronounce them as the fourth place team. Whooooo!
David and Mary on the other hand finally ran out of luck. Without any teams willing to risk their own games to help the Kentuckians stay around, they finally came in last. It's just as well. Their naivety was charming last time around, but this time it wore thin and occasionally came across as a sense of entitlement. Now the real race can begin.
Oh yeah, Rob and Amber came in first yet again.

Realivision News - Unfinished and partial seasons?

I've started updating old posts to have labels like those seen on all current commentary and recaps at the end of the posts. Two of those labels I will be using will be "unfinished season" and "partial season". For that to work, I really should explain the difference between the two.

Unfinished season - This would be a show I started covering, but dropped before the season finale. The reasons for this happen are plentiful, from losing interest (Big Brother: All-Stars) to burning out or being so far behind there's no point in catching up (Dancing With The Stars 3, Celebrity Duets) to the show being cancelled (this hasn't happened yet, thankfully). Okay, maybe the reasons aren't that plentiful, because that's about it.

Partial season - This is a show where it was likely covered up to the finale, but for whatever reason, either I joined it late or there are episodes missing in the middle. I didn't cover it, but Rockstar: Supernova was a show that I didn't start watching until several episodes in. Heck, that happened with the first two seasons of Survivor. If I get sucked in and am not overloaded with other shows, I might start writing about it.
This will also cover shows where midseason episodes are missing. This could be because of computer issues (Oh! This also applies to unfinished seasons!), recording issues, vacation issues, and becoming burned out but getting the fire back again issues.

At some point soon, there will be some minor changes made to the blog that shouldn't affect the overall look of it, but the sidebar will contain all the labels used to help you find your favourite shows.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 1

Gah! These people are idiots!
But before we get to the rampant stupidity that is ruling this season, another castaway has had their game shortened due to health reasons. Whatever happened to Gary (or "Papa Smurf" as this annoyingly nick-name obsessed cast insists on calling him) when he fell in that challenge a couple of weeks ago just wasn't going away, so the medical crew was called in for a second time. Unlike their previous visit, this time they left with Gary and Jeff Probst announced later that Gary's game was over.
Unlike previous game-ending health problems, this time around there was still going to be an Immunity Challenge and Tribal Council. That's okay for Moto though. Even though they just lost their first tribe member leaving them only one person ahead of Ravu, they've got the advantage in not sucking at challenges. All they have to do is win the next immunity and they'll be back to a two person advantage. Unless they do something very moronic. What are the chances of something like that happening with this cast?
Never mind answering that. So this week, let's look at the stupidity of different groups and individuals.
Anthony is stupid. He is hanging on by a thread, so he really should be trying to avoid friction with tribemates. Why he's not trying harder in the competitions is beyond me. It's not all his fault though, as the dislike some of his tribemates have for him is affecting their ability to work with him, as evidenced by the reward challenge. Which brings us to...
The Ravu tribe is stupid. It's only 39 days on the island, and even fewer until the merge. I don't care how you feel about someone. Suck it up and work together.
"Rocky" is stupid. Just shut up.
The women are stupid. When Ravu arrived at the reward challenge, the ratio of men to women jumped right out at me. The challenges aren't just physical strength, and this strategy of keeping the men around obviously isn't working. It's time to rethink that (though they might be doing that as Anthony is likely their next to go). It's no better on Moto where two women think they have a chance in an alliance with three men. There have been strong male/female alliances in the past, but more often than not, the men stick together. Everyone who has read this blog since the start, please repeat after me... WATCH THE DAMNED SHOW! The first person voted out of Moto was yes, a woman. Not that Liliana wasn't asking for it.
Liliana is stupid. On paper it seems like a good idea. Suck up to the men, give them backrubs, use your sex appeal. Except that this never works as the women can see what you're doing and as soon as they get the chance, your ass is gone. If you're going to try flirting as a tactic, at least be subtle about it.
"Dreamz" is stupid. What the hell was that? Do you really think that there are no alliances in your tribe? Here's a hint - if you don't think there are any alliances in your tribe on Survivor, you're in HUGE trouble as that just means that nobody has approached you about one and you were too stupid to approach anyone else. Then to top that stupidity off by calling a tribal meeting and throwing out two names for elimination, not giving any thought to them as people. It's one thing for someone to think they're expendable, it's another to go out and say it in front of everyone. That's not just stupid, that's being an ass as well. He's just lucky to be a strong man or he could well have been gone this week.
The men are stupid. See "The women are stupid" above. As much as physical strength is good to have around, it's also important to have brains and a cohesive tribe. Get over yourselves already.
Moto is surprisingly very, very stupid. What the hell?!!? Probst had a sealed bottle with him this week, something that's never good, and it was to go to the winning tribe after the Immunity Challenge. What was in the bottle? A choice. Comfort or Immunity. Easy decision, right? They just lost Gary for health reasons, if they go to Tribal Council, they'll lose another tribemate which will bring them back to even numbers with Ravu. But no. The morons chose comfort! Every single one of them who voted for comfort is very stupid. You never know how safe you really are (right, "Dreamz"?) so you never want to put yourself at risk if you don't have to.
I really hope Liliana voted for comfort. And I really, really hope they lose the next immunity. How comfortable will that couch and bed be then?
They're stupidity doesn't end there. I'm trying to find good reasons for them to send the people to Exile Island that they have been, and there's been nothing consistant. Exile Island is still relatively new, this is only the third season of it, but it would be great to see a tribe use it to try and weaken their opponents. If they were just sending players they're perceiving as weak so they can have a chance at getting the hidden immunity, that would be one thing, but they sent Earl, someone nobody could call weak.
I still can't believe they chose comfort. Yeesh.
The producers are stupid. A bed! On Survivor! As if the couch and everything else at the Moto camp wasn't bad enough! Sure, it's been interesting to finally see how this has worked out, but it still takes away from the integrity of the game.
So much stupidity. Four episodes in and there is nobody I want to cheer on to win. That's not a good sign. That doesn't make the season horrible to watch though. It just means fewer highs and lows. It is unfortunate that the only reason to cheer against certain people or tribes is to see their idiocy hurt them.
I'm not big on alcohol, but I need a drink after watching this one...

P.S. It seems there are people out there not sure what it was that snake was regurgitating (I just read the Survivors Strike Back blog at CBS.com, and two people there were asking). It was shedding its old skin. If you look back, you'll see its old skin collapse once it was left it. It was fascinating and disgusting all at once! Dang, biology is awesome.