Big Brother 8

I was right about Big Brother 8 and not having 12 complete strangers in the house. I'm also so convinced that the producers manipulate the outcome that this was my last season of the show.
Goodbye, Big Brother. It was nice while it lasted.

Screw you, Big Brother producers.

The cast has been announced for the new season of Big Brother, as well as the new lame casting twist... Pairs of people with unresolved issues in their lives are being put in the house together.
No.
NO!
NO NO NO NO NO!
Enough with the casting "twists" where people know each other! After the trainwreck that was Big Brother: All-Stars, the series needed to get back to the basics of 12 COMPLETE STRANGERS!
I don't know how they ever got this idea in their heads that they need to do stunt casting every season, but it's worn out its welcome. I will still watch at first, but this could well be the last season I do watch, and at this point I wouldn't really miss it if it were the last season of the show ever.
At least Survivor and The Amazing Race still rock. And now we've got Pirate Master. Arrr.

http://www.cbs.com/primetime/bigbrother8/

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Wrap-Up

I've never been more torn on reality contestants than I am on Charla and Mirna, especially Mirna. Usually, if I can't stand a player, I want to see them gone, and ooooh, I could not stand this team. From their hypocrisy to their inability to go through a country without temporarily kidnapping a local to the insulting and patronizing accents they put on whenever they spoke to someone who didn't have English as a first language (and possibly even a couple who did) to their ridiculous hate of the Beauty Queens to calling every local "my friend" with the faint sound of panic in their voices all the way to their constant use of "This is life or death," this is a team that made every inch of my being scream, "PLEASE GET ELIMINATED!"
Yet at the same time, and this is why this season confused me so, I wanted them to stay because, damn, they were entertaining in their awfulness. I think I finally understand Lord Of The Rings fans. Anyway, they came in third, and I'm glad they made the final three. Sure, that meant they had a chance to win, but if that happened, the fact that they were an all-female team would have made that a lot easier to live with, despite how much more sanctimonious it would have made them.
As it is, we did have an all-female team finish better than any before, and come within a few short minutes of winning. Dustin and Kandice, for two seasons now you've had no bigger cheerleader than myself, and once again you showed why. A second place finish isn't the win for a million, but in The Amazing Race, it's nothing to sneeze at. You two showed why you were brought back for All-Stars by the way you ran so much of the race with smiles on your faces and just a joy for being there. You can also take pride that in your original season, you two actually managed to beat a Fast Forward. That is tough to do for anyone, but you pulled it off.
I don't know what it is about these two that raise the ire of their fellow racers so much, but for both seasons they've managed to make enemies. Are they kicking puppies when the camera isn't looking? They don't do much different and take any advantage any more than any other racers. They have no compunction about using the Yield, but damn it, that's what it's there for! You don't see teams whining in hockey because the other side is using a goalie, do you? Yes, it must be horribly frustrating to be Yielded, but it's not like the team punched your grandmother in the face. Eric overreacted to being Yielded just a tad, but that's nothing new in the Race.
What's more annoying is how the other teams get all morally outraged over the Yield being used. There are very few opportunities for outright strategy in this competition. To not use it to your advantage (or not use it to your advantage, rather than not using it out of a sense of moral superiority) is just stupid. It's a tool the Race provides, and using it makes sense. I love that no matter how freaked out everyone got, Kandice and Dustin had no problem using it, and didn't let it make them feel bad. Yes, Oswald, they used a tool the Race provides guilt-free. And they used it smartly, as Eric and Danielle were huge threats (very huge threats, it turns out).
They even had the best fight. There was none of the screaming we're used to in fights on this show. There was frustration, a temporary desire to quit, then they got over it and were back to smiles. There are times you can really tell when people racing together really are friends (I believe it was the first season I watched that one woman didn't want to stop unrolling haystacks looking for the clue because she didn't want to let down her friend), and this fight was one of those moments. Dustin told Kandice she couldn't imagine running this race without her. Throw in the time Dustin was crying out of concern for when Kandice was high, so very high up and jumping off a building, I've finally come to a very hard decision. It was very hard to choose between the two, but I have, and so I'm proud to announce...
Dustin Seltzer, you are Miss Realivision 2007!
If there was an actual crown and ceremony, I'd have Miss Realivision 2006, Melissa Witek, present it to you, but it's all happening in spirit.
Danny and Oswald were my second choice to win. They also remembered to have fun for most of the race, and it was refreshing to see a team stop for refreshments. I started to sour on them a little near the end though when they started getting more grumpy, and especially when Oswald started getting all pissy and guilty about selling the last Yield to the Beauty Queens. Look, Ozzy, you needed the money as you were broke, and the Beauty Queens didn't use it maliciously. Get over it. I'd really hate to see some of these people on Big Brother or Survivor, seeing that we'd be hearing "integrity" get yammered on about more than we already do. And voting someone off? Oh no! That's not a nice thing to do! Yes, all this self-righteous yapping about the Yield got to me. If I was in the game and I got to the Yield first, you can bet I'd use it on someone's ass to give me an advantage.
Not that it mattered either time. Eric and Danielle were very good at coming back from Yields. In fact, the second time they did so well they may well have won that leg if it weren't for the Yield, so it was a good play and got the BQs another prize.
Oh, Eric and Danielle. I so didn't want you two to win, but you just had to go ahead and do that, didn't you? It's not that I hated you, it's just that when your squabbling wasn't annoying me, you bored me. But you won anyway, and I'll especially give props to Eric who is very good at this competition, coming in second the first time, and winning the second. I just wish I never had to see your pierced nipples. Nobody wants to see that.
In case you haven't heard, Eric and Danielle broke up very soon after the race. I guess he couldn't wait to ditch the beard and get back to Jeremy, his original partner, who promised Eric spankings in a strange, pointless phone call at the finish line.
One of the biggest head-scratching decisions from the producers this season was having one non-elimination leg right after the other. When Eric and Danielle were marked for elimination on the first leg, would they have just been marked for elimination the second time as well if they ended up coming in last? It makes no sense, and really takes away from the point of being marked for elimination. Back when they players just had to give up their money and possessions, it would have worked, but with the new rules, it doesn't.
I've also never seen a season where airports and flights have played a bigger role. Obviously they're a big part of every season, but rarely have they screwed so many teams so often. Joyce and Uchenna were eliminated because they chose the wrong flight and couldn't make their connection in time. Other teams wound up so far behind that the frontrunners were starting the next leg before they even reached the mat! I felt bad for them, but it was awesome to see. I'd also like to point out that in that particular leg, Dustin and Candice had come in first so they were the first to leave before those in the back arrived. Whoo hoo!
All in all, it was a good season. There weren't a heck of a lot of great challenges this time around, so that was a bummer (really, count stairs for a fast forward? Go for a ride? Come on). On the other hand, it was the best All-Star season of any of the shows that have had one. There wasn't as much baggage going in, and alliances count for very little thanks to the nature of the game, despite what Mary from Kentucky would like. She'd do very well in The Amazing Picnic, but she's just not cut out for The Amazing Race where people actually want to be ahead of you and aren't horrible, horrible people for doing so. This is why they missed the Chos from their season, another team not made for this game. If there's ever an Amazing Stroll Through The Park, they should apply.
Not having watched every season (to my regret), it was nice to see faces who were new to me this edition. I didn't get to know all of them, as the very first elimination was a team I'd never seen before. There were teams that left me wondering how they got picked for All-Stars. The two bald guys, Kevin and Drew... Were they more entertaining or stronger racers in their original season? Now I know how people who never saw the first season of Big Brother felt upon seeing Chicken George on their All-Stars (I so wanted Brittany back for that, but upon seeing what an abomination that season turned out to be, not only am I glad she wasn't, I'm sorry any of my favourites who were there had to go through that).
There is good news and bad news from CBS about the show. The good news is the Race will be back. The bad news is, it's going to be a wait. Unless there's a big upturn in ratings, we've come to the end of two seasons a year. Luck for us though, there will still be a lot to watch. I'm particular looking forward to the premiere of Pirate Master coming up very soon. Arrrr.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 25

Holy friggin' crap, this episode was all about the airport, wasn't it?
It seems like Dar Es Salaam is the most popular vacation spot on the planet, because every team had issues getting there as every team had to fly stand-by.
The first place win helped Charla and Mirna tremendously here, as they managed to get the first shot at seats on all flights and got a huge lead over all the other teams.
It wasn't even close, people.
This insane day at the airport was frustrating to the teams, and probably boring to any viewers who wanted to see more action. Not me. I loved every minute of it. You know who else probably loved it? Joyce and Uchenna. If you remember, they came in last on the previous leg, and so were marked for elimination. That meant if they didn't come in first this leg, they would incur a 30 minute penalty. Remembering that this is just a commentary and not a recap, I can say that penalty didn't make any difference at all. In fact, they got so far ahead of the next closest team, the Beauty Queens (yay!), that Kandice and Dustin still hadn't reached the Pit Stop by the time the penalty came to an end.
Before I go on any further, I just want to let you know this is going to be a short one. I was very tired last week, so tired I didn't event want to think of writing. Then this weekend other stuff came up, and when I wasn't doing that, I was pretty zombified. Sorry.
But speaking of short ones, Charla and Mirna made it to Dar Es Salaam first, where they had to take a boat to their next clue. However, because of allegedly inclement weather, the captain wouldn't take them out until early the next morning.
This allowed Danny and Oswald to catch up to them where Oswald made a joke about a certain bench being where they, um, "worked", that wasn't ha-ha funny (unlike my hiiiiilarious recaps and commentaries (dang, I hit my high point with Treasure Hunters)), but the fact that it went completely over Charla and Mirna's heads was great. And right there is where I show what a classy joint this is. I made one short comment earlier (I hesitate to call it a "joke"), but I let that part about going over Charla and Mirna's heads go right by. That's why this is where the swells come to get their fancy television writing.
Ugh. I'm not going to even going to try to figure out who was where and when. Eric and Danielle were given their seats by mistake, which led to one of the highlights of the season - seeing them being asked to kindly leave the aircraft. So this gave three teams a lead over them, leaving them stranded with Ian, Teri, Bill and Joe at the airport. He wasn't vocalizing it, but you just know Eric was thinking, "Eww, old people! Ick! Ick!"
However, because they were removed from the last flight, they got the only seats on the next flight, leaving the oldsters of the season with more airport waiting to do.
Seriously, it was so bad that I think teams were still there at around the half-hour mark on the episode. I think all the teams made it to Johannesburg from Mozambique, but it's all a jumble of ticket counters and the joie de vivre of hanging around airports. This leg wasn't even going to be close. There was at least a good day or so between the first place and last place teams.
To make matters worse for our two fogey teams, Eric and Danielle were able to get the next flight while they still had to wait. There are going to have to be some serious equalization points to bring the whole pack back together. You know that things are horribly awry when Mirna and Charla come in first two legs in a row! Oops. Spoiler.
Ah, let's just look at the Detour. Solve It or Schlep It. In Solve it, teams had to do a nifty puzzle. In Schlep it, they had to carry two huge, misshapen logs on a cart. Some teams did one, some the other. Of the first place teams, Oswald and Danny finished first, but they stopped for some fruit on the way to the Roadblock, allowing Charla and Mirna to overtake them.
At the Roadblock, one of the teammates had to use a throwing weapon called a Rungu to destroy a clay target and get their next clue. Mirna triumphed, and they got their second first place finish. Their prize for winning this leg? A pair of catamarans. The blank looks on their faces made me scream, "BOATS! CATAMARANS ARE BOATS, YOU PATRONIZING TO NON-ENGLISH SPEAKERS IDIOTS!"
Is it wrong to so thoroughly dislike a team but enjoy them at the same time? I so don't want them to win, but damn, it just wouldn't be the same without them if they don't make it to third place behind the second place Oswald and Danny and first place, million dollar winning Kandice and Dustin.
So Oswald and Danny came in next, followed by Joyce and Uchenna who waited half an hour and the Beauty Queens still didn't show up (I can't for the life of me remember how they got so far behind), but at least the BQs came in fourth. Eric and Danielle made their way boringly to the mat, leaving two more teams. See? I haven't given everything away.
Bill and Joe arrived in sixth place, meaning Teri and Ian were eliminated, leaving one less geriatric team around to remind Eric that he will age and his pierce nipples will sag.


Anyway, sorry that was so truncated. Except for the Grease finale, expect to see that until I'm caught up again. Heck, I still have to write up last week's Apprentice and as I look at the clock, this week's is starting in about five minutes. Urgh.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 21

I wonder if Survivor's producers, after Stephenie became the last member standing of the Ulong tribe a few seasons back, came up with something they might possibly call the "Palau Contingency", a plan disguised as a twist just in case one tribe keeps getting their butts handed to them immunity after immunity. Heck, at least Ulong managed to win a reward challenge or two. Ravu can barely even win our sympathy.
This possible contingency plan likely states that if one tribe loses often enough, rather than have them just keep losing until the merge, things will be shaken up and the tribes remixed.
After all, what are the odds that this particular twist would happen on the season where one tribe wouldn't win a challenge if it was "Guess which hand I'm hiding a quarter in"?
So the tribes were reforming. Earl from Ravu and Edgardo from Moto got to be the "captains" and choose who they'd like to have on their teams. To nobody's surprise on the first season where only members of one sex have been voted out so far, they each pick a guy. Everyone had to pick from the opposing tribe, so Edgardo chose Mookie and Earl chose "Boo". Yeah. Mookie picked a guy too, but "Boo" chose Michelle. Oh! That was unexpected! Edgardo's team picked man after man, but Michelle called out Cassandra's name! Don't you get it, Michelle? You have to choose strong! STRONG!
It was interesting to see it all shape up. Earl's team ended up with Stacy and Yau-Man as well, while the "weakest" member of Edgardo's team was Anthony. Personally, I think the weakest member of that tribe is "Rocky", but more on that later.
It did come down to Yau-Man versus Lisi at the end, and when Yau-Man was picked, Lisi was sent off to Exile Island where she would remain until after Tribal Council, when she would then join the losing tribe. Like that worked out really well for Sylvia.
Lisi didn't take any of this well and started talking about how her time on Survivor was over, raising the ire of host Jeff Probst. Jeff doesn't like to hear people talk about quitting, damn it! I'm sure he's got Osten locked away in a dungeon somewhere, but the FBI won't take my calls seriously enough to investigate.
After the tribes were picked and Lisi was carted off to her snake-infested island, there was only one matter left to settle. Who would get the luxury of Moto's camp?
In one of the greatest reward challenges ever, Edgardo got to pick one of two buffs out of a bag!
Sometimes good things do happen in life, and Edgardo picked the Ravu buff, meaning this new Ravu tribe would have to go back to the crappy Ravu camp and the new Moto would get to go on to the sweet island life.
I admit, I was a bit biased against Edgardo's tribe because it was all men. The sexist nature of much of the voting has driven me to that. Ravu kept voting out woman after woman, yet they still kept losing. This fetish for physical strength obviously hasn't been the issue. And never mind that a couple of the woman voted out were physically stronger than Yau-Man. He's a man, it even says so in his name! That makes him strong! Seriously, it's been driving me crazy.
This kind of sexism isn't new to Survivor, but it reached new lows with this episode and with this new Ravu tribe. I'm not saying they're Saudi or Taliban bad, but damn, the Ravu tribesmen were full of themselves for having penises and as such would own the rest of the season! Booya!
In 14 seasons of Survivor, there were tribes I've wanted to win or lose so bad I could taste it. The aforementioned Ulong in Palau, Morgan in the Pearl Islands, Yasur on Vanuatu, and heck, Aitu last season, all teams I loved to see win and really, so very much wanted to see win. None of it has come close to how much I wanted to see Moto win immunity this week and send the sexist pigs to Tribal Council. Granted, not all of them are sexist. Anthony didn't come across that way, and the guy was seen as the weakest member of the tribe and treated like it. Especially by "Rocky".
Screw it, "Rocky". That's the last time I'm going to use that stupid nickname on you, James. Up until now, James has been loud and obnoxious with the worst of his sexism coming out when he couldn't stand Rita talking as a woman with another woman. His hatred of women came out in full force in this episode, along with his hatred of men he perceives as weak, or as he kept referring to Anthony, "effeminate".
Ladies and Gentlemen, we finally have a full-blown villain for this season. Unfortunately, he's not an entertaining one like Mirna and Charla are on The Amazing Race. No, sadly he's just a homophobic, misogynistic asshole with too high an opinion of himself. It's my blog, I can use that language if I want.
It was impossible to take him seriously when he told us that he loves women. He loves talking to them, though that claim doesn't hold up well considering that he went after Rita because she, you know, talked. He loves being with them, he loves paying for sex with them... Okay, he didn't say that last part, but he clearly sees women who aren't his family as lesser beings and quite possibly as objects. Hell, how did he insult Anthony? But comparing him to a woman and calling him "effeminate". That brought to light not only his misogyny, but his homophobia too. If the cameras weren't on him, I wonder if he would have used even more derogatory terminology. Maybe he did, but the producers opted not to show it.
Oh, and he's a bully too. A misogynistic, homophobic bully. The way he treated Anthony around camp, expecting the man to do all his work while putting up with his verbal assaults was horrendous. Good on Anthony on not letting loose and punching him in the throat, because damn, James deserved it.
So yeah, James has now beaten "Jonny Fairplay", Scout, and Twila as my most disliked Survivor contestant ever. Congratulations, jackass.
I thought it would be too much to ask after the testosterone squad ended up as Ravu that they'd also lose the immunity. Daaaaaamn, I wanted them to lose. There's no way to get such goodness twice in one episode.
The great thing about watching it on tape, which is what I did with this episode, is being able to fast forward through the competition. There was just too much at stake for me to be able to handle the mistake. Once Moto won and I let the cheers out, I rewound it and watched everything unfold. Damn, that was the sweetest win ever.
Now we were finally going to get to see a man voted out. It wasn't as good as it would have been if there would have been at least one woman on that tribe (Lisi will be joining them next week, so after the way she treated "Dreamz" and Cassandra, maybe there really is some karma in the universe), but it was going to be nice to see.
Unfortunately it was looking like that man was going to be Anthony, someone James convinced everyone else is the weakest link. Anthony didn't just stand by and let this happen though. He made sure he let the others know just how much negativity James brings to the tribe, and oh, does he ever.
Instead of all those women being voted out one by one, I wonder how much better Ravu would have been if they got rid of James early. He hasn't done anything to keep them in contention at the challenges, and he has been a hugely negative force in camp. There was no reason to get rid of Rita other than that she annoyed him, and he's quickly turned on any alliances he's had.
One small problem that escaped both James and Anthony is that by turning on themselves, neither of them are going to have numbers on their side. Whichever one goes, that leaves the other and Mookie as the only two original members of Ravu, and when Lisi joins them next week, that will be Edgardo, Alex, "Dreamz" and Lisi from the original Moto against Mookie and whoever is left. What they needed to do was stick together, and feel out who would most likely flip from Moto. Last week "Dreamz" couldn't wait for the merge so he could change sides. Nobody but us knew this, but nobody will know it if they don't try to find out these things.
Earl on the new Moto is becoming Realivision's choice to win this season. He was smart enough to know that numbers matter on Survivor, and he was able to get Cassandra over on his side. Luckily they never had to go to Tribal Council, but if they did, I strongly suspect it would have been a former Moto member going home. Sadly it would have been Stacy as the only other choice would have been "Boo" and why would they vote him off when there's another woman they could send packing? Damn, I'm really hoping the women have noticed this particular numbers issue. The best they (and Yau-Man) can hope for now is that once the merge happens, the manly men start picking each other off.
There is an amazing lack of foresight on the show this season. The only people we've seen really thinking ahead have been Alex, Earl, and "Dreamz". Most of the old Moto were happy where they were, and the old Ravu were just wanting to try and win the next challenge, concentrating on strength even though it was puzzles that kept doing them in. This is making any actual strategizing a breath of fresh air. Too bad for the former Ravu that they're stuck with a genius like James on the new Ravu. Done right, this mixing of the tribes could have been the best thing that ever happened to them.
Before getting to Tribal Council, something happened on the new Ravu that left me questioning the producers. They caught fish. Normally this wouldn't be worth noting, but the old Ravu never got fishing equipment. So how did the new tribe get fishing line? If they're going to do this twist, then the new tribes should have exactly what the old tribes did, nothing more, nothing less.
Okay, Tribal Council. As expected, it was down to James versus Anthony. James continued to be a bully, calling Anthony "effeminate" and berated him for his lack of social skills. You may think you do, but you don't truly know the meaning of "irony" until you've seen James bitching about someone else's lack of social skills.
The looks on the faces of the men who weren't going home as James kept flapping his hateful gums gave me hope. Anthony did tell them what a negative influence this ass was, and they were obviously seeing it. Or just feeling bad for Anthony. I really hope they weren't feeling bad for Anthony because they felt like this crap was something he needed to hear. He doesn't. He's fine just the way he is. I'll take a dozen of him over one James any day.
I did like how he stuck up for himself, though I would have thrown a couple of f-bombs at the f-wad. He wondered if being a jerk was what it took to be a strong, manly man, and he didn't think they needed the extra drama and negativity in camp. Well, maybe he should have been an ass, because the new Ravu voted him out.
Unbelievable. James is an idiot and has never, as far as I can remember, been a physical asset. Maybe because he's so loud and obnoxious he comes across as stronger than he is, but he's only going to keep dragging Ravu down for as long as he's in the game.
Though with the new tribe dynamics and wanting to see Ravu keep losing, I'm not so sure that's a bad thing.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 18

It's strange, this first episode without Rob and Amber. I'm not used to seeing them leave so early in any of these shows. The good news is that the race doesn't seem to be a lock for any one team now. Hell, even Mirna and Charla might come in first at some point. I know, and pigs will fly!
Thanks to the ending that surprised everyone, the second biggest bit of news from this episode was completely overlooked. Any other episode, except last week's, would have everyone buzzing about this. Eric, yes, that Eric, showed some personality! Unfortunately that personality includes such descriptors as "asshole-ish" and "somewhat homophobic". Joe and Bill aren't my two favourite racers either, but shouting "Freak freak freak!" at them was uncalled for. It wouldn't have been so bad if Eric hadn't then referred to them as "queens" in an interview seconds after this happened.
There is no need to like Joe and Bill (The Guidos), and the way they overreacted to Eric telling his driver to make it look like they were trying to pass them was ridiculous. I'm talking Mirna-level ridiculous here. But that's no excuse for homophobic insults, Mr. Nipple Rings Possibly Trying To Overcompensate For Something.
All of this overshadowed yet another big piece of news - the race finally left South America! Whoo hoo! From Argentina, the teams went all the way to Mozambique in Africa! With this being the All-Star season, it would have been nice to see them fit as many continents as possible, but now it's likely that either Europe or Asia will be skipped, damn it. Not only would have been nice to see the teams race through both, it would have been cool to see them have to go through Australia and Antarctica too. Australia is still a possibility, but considering how close they just were to Antarctica only to go in a completely different direction, that's not going to happen. A race through all seven continents really would have added to something calling itself "All-Stars".
Okay, that out of the way, before finding out they were leaving the country, the teams first had to find their clue. They took a lift up and hiked up to Marial Glacier, a glacier that looked pretty haggard and all melty-like. I won't get into global warming though, as I'll soon be getting preachy over something else.
After getting off the lift and before they started their hike, the teams had to grab backpacks what had avalanche beacons that they would use to find other beacons in the snow, and it was there where they would find their next clue.
It went fairly smoothly for most of the teams. Some had an easier time than others. One team, however, didn't read their whole clue before hiking to the glacier and so had to go all the way back to the lift to get their backpacks. Why must you break my heart like this, Kandice and Dustin? The Beauty Queens are a kickass team, but they keep making careless mistakes, something I hope all this extra hiking helped cure them of.
Fortunately Oswald and Danny were having a very hard time working out the beacon, so they were the last team to leave. You know, I wouldn't worry about being the last team to leave this early in a leg, because there's bound to be a time equalizer somewhere. Still, you don't want to take that chance either.
Okay, now the teams left for Africa, we got that unpleasantness between Eric and The Guidos, and yes, that part happened at a time equalizer anyway as they had to wait for a park to open so they could do their next task.
The Roadblock was cool and scary this week. Scary because thanks to war, Mozambique is littered with landmines, a deadly threat to its citizens, and especially its children. It kinda makes the whole "making a game of this" thing seem a little heartless. But if it helps to educate, that's a good thing. The cool part of it was the giant rats that are trained to search for landmines. How giant were these rats? Think of a small dog. Yeah, that big. Phil Keoghan was even cradling one in his arms as he was describing the task. If you have to cradle it in your arms, that's one monster rodent.
One of the teammates had to choose a rat and use it to find a deactivated mine, and there they would also find a race marker, which would get them their clue. Not taking a chance that the mines weren't properly deactivated, the racers only had to find it, some poor local would have to dig. To make this task easier, the rats were attached to strings and could only go back and forth in a straight line. Once they found the mine, they'd start digging. The racer would then say they believe the mine is there, their local help would go over it with a metal detector, and if correct, would start digging, praying fervently that their last day on Earth wouldn't be spent helping some American game show contestant win a million dollars.
For the most part, the racers were able to get through this task without incident. Some took a little longer than others, but the only one who really had a problem was Charla. Whether it was impatience, or if she was too busy getting righteously outraged over all the other rats daring to do better than hers, she wasn't paying enough attention and as the rat would start digging, she got it to move on. Not that it mattered for long, because one commercial break later, she finally noticed the rat digging, and they got their clue. It was nice to see this task end without any Mozambicans being blown up.
Now with everyone on the road again, it was time to go back to the town they started from, Maputo, find their next clue, and on to the Detour.
"Pamper or Porter?" The choice, as always, was between two tasks. The teams would either have to travel to a market and paint fingernails to try and raise 30 metecais (about one U.S. dollar), or they'd have to travel to another market, use their hands to fill ten 45-pound (about 20.4 kg) bags with coal then carry one of those bags to a specific address where the owner would hand them their next clue. I always wonder how the producers get some of these tasks set up, especially when they have to go to regular homes. Do they go to random houses and ask if they'd like a free bag of coal? The people who answer the doors, while having the clues, always seem to be a little surprised that this really is happening.
Phil let's us know something the racers aren't aware of... In Maputo, it's usually men who paint fingernails for pay. This led to every man in the race choosing to do the coal task, incorrectly believing that it might be harder for them to get customers.
The two all-female teams, however, went with the nails. Sure, it's usually men who do this in Maputo, but how often does one get the chance in Mozambique to have her nails coloured by a blonde little person and her cousin both talking in insulting accents? Not very often, my friends! Not very often. Heck, how often does one get that chance in Canada or the United States? Not very often, my friends!
So while the majority of the teams were digging through coal all hot and sweaty, Charla and Mirna pulled off a feat most thought impossible. They came in first. First they knock out Rob and Amber then they come in first? Up is down, black is white, Horatio Sanz is funny!
There is a downside to this, of course. They are still Charla and Mirna, so they're going to see this as a vindication of their self-righteous, hypocritical ways. God or karma saw to it that they won this leg as a reward for being such fantastically good people who know that any language barrier can be overcome as long as you use a horrible, patronizing accent!
But damn, if they aren't entertaining. I don't want to see them win, but I would like to see them make it to fourth or fifth place just because they make for good television.
The team I do want to see win, despite the mistakes they've made, came in second. Well done, Beauty Queens! They finally kicked the fourth place or lower habit they've developed this season. Now if only they can get a few first place finishes in. Or even just one where it really, really counts.
Now I said earlier that all the men chose to do the coal task. That doesn't mean all of them actually did it. Despite Ian wanting to do the coal, he and Teri got lost and wound up at the wrong market. Rather than waste time trying to find the correct one, they decided to do the fingernail polish despite Ian's trepidations. They managed to get two young ladies to agree to have their nails done for, what was to them, an obscenely expensive price. With that done, Teri and Ian headed to the Pit Stop and, much to their surprise, a third place finish.
That left all the coal diggers. Oswald and Danny were the first to finish, and when they got to the mat all filthy and covered in coal dust, Oswald gave us one of the greatest Amazing Race moments ever when he chased Phil around, trying to get a hug.
Joe and Bill came in next, leaving it a last place fight between Eric and Danielle and Joyce and Uchenna.
Eric and Danielle convinced some local kids to lead them to their address, while Joyce and Uchenna relied instead on their own uncanny sense of direction which allowed Captain Nipple Rings and Boobin to beat them to the mat.
So this was it for Uchenna and Joyce. That's okay, they've won before. They're not the team I wanted to see leave this week, but at least... what? It's a non-elimination leg!
Carrying over the non-elimination rule that first came into play last season, they got to keep all their money and belongings, but they are now marked for elimination. That means that unless Joyce and Uchenna come in first next week, they will incur a half-hour penalty and will not be allowed to check in until that half-hour is up. It's certainly possible, and I will be keeping my fingers crossed that Eric and Danielle get so lost that they fall a good 31 minutes behind everyone else. Then Joyce and Uchenna can be eliminated the week after that.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 11

It's episodes like this one that make me wish I was recapping Amazing Race instead of just commenting on it, there was so much juiciness in it (but due to technical difficulties, recapping a show that isn't a talent competition isn't possible). This episode also managed to turn my own competitive reality world upside down. For the first time in two seasons of this show and one season of Survivor, I actually liked Amber. I know she was in another season of Survivor, but I still can't remember her from it.
And it's not just that. I've even softened towards Boston Rob. Damn it, how ironic is it that I've started liking Romber now, this episode of all episodes?
After finishing first yet again at the last pit stop, they were the first to leave on this leg. They would never see first place again, except for in my heart for a short time.
It wasn't like they didn't get off to a good start. At one point, there was a good two hour difference between the teams in the front and the two teams in the back who couldn't get on the first flight, giving those that arrived at the Detour first a pretty decent head start.
The options at the Detour were pretty simple. Sign It or Navigate It. Build a signpost, correctly spelled and in proper order, detailing the stops Magellan took on his historic trip around the world, or follow a simple map to find a man dressed as a sailor, get a compass from him, and follow that directly south.
The map option seemed the easiest to me, but not all the teams took it. Rob and Amber (well, Rob) chose the signpost because Rob builds things, Joyce and Uchenna chose it as well, as did Team Realivision who, though we do love Kandice and Dustin, have their issues with directions and thus this did seem like the better choice.
Speaking of the Beauty Queens, and we always do, they've realized that they haven't been kicking as much ass as they did last season. Part of this problem is that they've been overthinking everything. As soon as I heard that, I knew the haters would have a field day despite it being true. It happened on this task as well. Instead of just doing it as stated on the clue, they started to wonder if all the little signs on the post had to be pointing in the proper direction to the different locations (they didn't). That ate up a lot of time, of course.
While the teams who chose the signpost task worked away at it, the teams that chose the map and compass finished quickly and started heading to their next location where they had to get spots on a charter plane.
Rob was the first at the signpost task to get the correct starting location for Magellan, and he and Amber did well with getting their post finished, but it turns out that Romber has a weakness after all. Spelling. I've no doubt while watching this episode and seeing the camera keep showing us that they spelled "Phillipines" as "Philipeans", they must have fallened to their knees, rending their clothes and shouting, "Curse our semi-literateness!" Why it never occurred to them to double check their spelling against the map they had to copy from after they were first told by the judge that they didn't have it right is beyond me.
Uchenna and Joyce were able to finish their sign correctly after one misstep where they started the voyage at Guam instead of Seville, Spain, the only team on this Detour who were able to do so, and they headed off to their next destination.
Team Realivision were keeping an eye on clock and realized that the two teams behind them would be landing shortly, so they proposed to team up with Rob and Amber to give up on this task and try the navigation.
Normally I'd advise against joining up with the Beauty Queens on any tasks that involve directions, but at this point there was no real choice. I don't know why they didn't change tasks earlier, something Amber tried to convince Rob to do but he stubbornly refused.
So they headed off, but still struggled. As they were trying to find the sailor, Joe and Bill ("the Guidos", a team name I don't understand) showed up and passed them. Ouch. Luckily Mirna and Charla decided to do Sign It, which resulted in Charla trying to carry supplies while Mirna screamed at her. Of course, if Charla didn't try to help, Mirna would have screamed at her. If we were to get to see what goes on at the Pit Stop, I'm sure we'd be treated to Mirna screaming at Charla there. "THAT'S MY SANDWICH! DON'T TOUCH MY SANDWICH, CHARLA! GO GET YOUR OWN! I NEED SOME MILK, COME WITH ME, CHARLA! HURRY! HURRY! STOP EATING THOSE CHIPS SO LOUDLY!"
That Mirna is such a delight.
Meanwhile, back at Navigate It, the Guidos got their clue and our little alliance of Romber and the Beauty Queens got their compasses. However, instead of following the directions, they decided to keep using the map.
Dustin and Kandice, you know I love you, but your sense of direction is going to kill me before this season is over. But if anyone's going to mess up "head straight south" while they've got a compass in their hand...
So, let's look at what did in Rob and Amber this episode. Stubborness, spelling, and teaming with the Beauty Queens when directions are important.
By this point in the race, it was safe to bed that Rob and Amber were going to miss first place for the first time this season. But were things going so bad that they'd get eliminated?
Rob wasn't used to being this far behind, and he wasn't happy having to take the later charter flight. Unlike those racers who are ecstatic when they have to take the later plane, bus, train, boat, or horse-drawn carriage.
Next stop - the end of the world. Teams had to travel to the southern most tip of Argentina, which just so happens to be the southern most tip of South America. To be so close to penguins, yet so far...
The clues weren't done yet. Racers had to find the clue box that would lead them to boats that would take them to the Road Block. It was here that I finally liked Amber. She and Rob overshot the clue box, and Mirna and Charla followed right behind them. Nothing new there. However, when they realized they must have missed it, Romber turned around and with their last clue still in their hands, Amber said "Got it!" as they walked past Team Undermedicated. Mirna suspected a lie, because she's allegedly an attorney and is used to people lying. This threw me for a loop. Somewhere, somehow, Mirna practices law? The hilarious images that brings forth are highly entertaining, including how often she must have been jailed for contempt of court for screaming at judges. And really, should a lawyer be getting high and mighty about other people not living up to the moral code she expects in people who aren't her?
It got even better at the pier. Charla went up to Amber and asked why she lied (because it's a friggin' game, dumbass, and they don't want to be in last place). Amber told her she was talking to Rob, and when she said "Got it!" she meant that she realized where the clue box was. Lovely.
Joyce and Uchenna went down a little in my book though. Before Charla and Mirna arrived at the pier, they were laughing as much as anyone else at the "Got it!" lie, but afterwards they got almost as sniffy about it as Team Undermedicated.
The Road Block this leg was the ever-popular needle in a haystack kind of challenge. One member of each team had to sort through a huge bag of mail of 1600 envelopes to find one of two letters addressed to them, then read the letter which was from a team from their original season. The team would then have to search the island for the Pit Stop where someone may be eliminated. It seems a little early for a non-elimination leg, but this is All-Stars. You never know what they might pull (like never getting out of South America until the final leg, but with everyone this far south, I'd really love to see the race go through Antarctica).
Oswald and Danny got through the envelopes and to the mat to become the first non-Romber team of the season to get first place. After that, the only thing to note outside of Rob/Amber/Charla/Mirna was that the Beauty Queens got a letter from one of the members of their biggest rivals last season, Lyn from Alabama. Her teammate was either unable or unwilling to put the anger behind her, proving that Lyn was the more reasonable half of that team (which was pretty obvious while watching). Anyway, that was pretty cool.
Rob and Amber and Charla and Mirna weren't quite so lucky. Their letters were quite hateful, and there's no need for that. Once the season is over, let go of the hate. Rob and Amber are just very competitive and aren't above sabotaging other players, but hey, it is a game. If Charla and Mirna were as insane their first time out, that would explain their hateful missive. It's bad enough to be the bottom two teams, but to get this kick in the teeth too?
I don't know why Charla didn't do this Roadblock as it wasn't particularly physical and if they defy the odds and stay around for several more legs, she should end up having to do a task that doesn't suit her physical limitations. There isn't much in the way of strategy in The Amazing Race, but when it comes to Road Blocks where only one team member can compete and each person has to do half the tasks, if one team member is more physically capable, use the other on tasks that aren't so physical. But on the other hand, Mirna did finish this task before Rob, giving her and her cousin a head start to the mat. Enough of a head start, it turned out.
As much as I finally started to like Rob and Amber for the first time, it was still pretty fun to see them get beat by an insane lawyer and her little person cousin. I may not like Charla and Mirna, but they are damned entertaining and it would be great to see them beat Eric and Danielle next, the most boring team left this season. At least in his first season, Eric had Jeremy as his partner and the homoerotic subtext of that team and they way they tried to hide it by talking about girls all the time helped make them fun. And he was part of the team that called and cancelled other people's cabs! This Eric isn't like that! Now the most entertaining thing about him is wondering when we'll get to see his pierced nipples next!
Oh, Rob and Amber. From three straight first place finishes to eliminated in their worst place finish in any of their shows. Now they'll have to go back to struggling on one of their other 30 or so reality shows and living off of Amber's Survivor: All-Stars winnings.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 8

Last week it was all about the idiots, and there was more of that this week, but there was also some sexism (which is just a form of idiocy in itself) and even some glimmerings of intelligence from some people who realized that there is more to Survivor than the challenges.
While there is still nobody to really get behind and cheer on, at least those with the glimmerings are giving us people we'd rather see over some of the other horrible players this season, and oh, there are some horrible players.
Due to their domination in every competition, we haven't met too much of Moto, but we finally got to learn what a wonderful bunch of loveable winners they really are. Of the seven people left in their tribe, five are in an alliance, leaving two in the wilderness. Alex did the math and realized that if they merge at ten people, "Dreamz" and Cassandra could well join the remaining Ravu members, tying the numbers at five and five. Oooh, good catch. The problem is, his alliance is comprised mostly of jerks. Yes, I'm keeping my language clean for you, my PG readers. Yes, those jerks were treating "Dreamz" and Cassandra like poo. We see it time and again, an alliance gets a numbers advantage and the power goes to their heads, but rarely does it seem to get as dehumanizing as this. At most, those in the minority are left to do more than their share of work, but what we saw here was beyond ridiculous.
The worst offenders appeared to be Lisi and Stacy, though "Boo" was getting his fair share of assholeness in with those two. Really, would it have killed them to let Cassandra have better than just the coffee grounds?
With the possibility of "Dreamz" and Cassandra joining forces with the remaining Ravuites, perhaps, just maybe, possibly they should consider treating those two a little better. Edgardo agreed, but the other three showed a complete lack of forsight and saw no reason to do this. Putting the game aside, and how often do I do this, but an even better reason to treat them better is that they are human beings, and it would do one well in life to realize this and show some humanity. "Why should we start treating them well?" Because, if nothing else, you're showing yourselves to be assholes on international television.
So good job figuring out the numbers, Alex and Edgardo, but you started to lose me when some sexism crept into your discussion. They called "Boo" stupid, but said that Lisi and Stacy were being "irrational", because that's how women are, you know. If they called all three stupid, or all three irrational, I'd be fine with it. But when it's just the women being described with a word that's been used to belittle women's intelligence for centuries, well you kinda start to lose me.
Well, here's a bit of irrationality coming from a woman - just being nice to the two outcasts isn't going to do a bit of good now. Nobody wants to play for sixth and seventh place. Before you started being assholes, you should have been making "Dreamz" and Cassandra feel like they were equal parts of your tribe and your alliance. Even if Lisi, Stacy, and "Boo" bought into the idea that treating human beings as human beings might be a decent (in both of its common definitions) idea, it's too late to make a difference. I'd know that even if "Dreamz" didn't tell us that he and Cassandra were planning on going to Ravu as soon as the merge happens.
I want to see Moto lose a challenge, and that's got nothing to do with all of this, and it's certainly nothing to do with wanting to see Ravu, the not-so-plucky underdogs winning. I'm just tired of seeing Moto walk away with everything.
In the immunity challenge, it almost happened. Not so much the reward challenge where it wasn't even close. They had to pair up against each other, and with big cushions, knock their opponents off a platform into some mud, first to seven points wins. "Rocky" called out "Dreamz", only to have him knock him off in a matter of seconds. The only Ravu tribe member to win in their round was Yau-Man, who knocked off Stacy. And so Moto got their third set of fishing gear, some potatoes, the aforementioned coffee, and some toiletries. and Ravu got nothing.
Despite all we've seen at Moto, it was likely that Ravu was going to go to Tribal Council again because we saw too much of them too. Anthony has been on the edge of being voted out for a while now, but someone new has been getting under "Rocky's" skin. Rita. You see, it turns out Rita likes to talk, and when she talks, it's all about somewhat shallow girly stuff, and this drove "Rocky" crazy. You see, when he's having conversations with people, it's all about the economic ramifications of the Kyoto accord vs. the imminent threat of global warming on Earth's delicate biosphere and the non-renewable nature of fossil fuels. Or at least that's what you'd assume from how affronted he was by Rita's assault on his ears. I strongly suspect his conversation rarely veers from cars, sports, and boobies, but I wouldn't say that because that would be stereotyping and that's just wrong.
Week after week, the most negative influence in the Ravu tribe has been "Rocky". I don't get how they're not voting him out yet. It's obvious that this tailoring for strength thing hasn't been working (especially when they're voting out Erica over Yau-Man because she got frustrated in one challenge). They should be trying something different and getting the negativity out of camp, and "Rocky" is the place to start for that.
Sure enough Ravu lost the immunity challenge. They managed to get within one point of winning their first competition but managed to blow it as always. The most frustrating part is that they should have won! It was basically an oversized version of Concentration, you know, where you have cards or other images turned face down and you have to match pairs by remembering what is where. In this version, it was all numbers and words turned over. Near the end, most of the pairs were matched up, and there were a few dummy choices where there weren't pairs, but enough was turned over that it should have been very easy to remember what was where. "Okay, they just turned over a 9, and it was between that one and that one, five over from the side." Easy, right? Sure, if you're not a member of Ravu.
Well, there was some jockeying for votes back at camp and there seemed be enough of a majority to vote off Anthony, but this wouldn't be Survivor: Fiji if they voted off a man while there are still women left in the tribe. Of course it was Rita's turn! If Michelle is shocked about leaving next week (no spoiler, it's pure guesswork based on voting patterns), she will obviously not have been paying attention.
This is five women in a row voted off. I've no doubt that's a Survivor record. I don't even have to double check it, that's how sure I am. Other Survivor records this season include the longest the hidden immunity idol has gone without being found, and of course the most challenge losses in a row by any one tribe. Even Ulong in Palau won a couple of rewards, their first in episode two. Heck, judging by the previews of the next episode, I wouldn't doubt the producers have invoked what they might call "the Palau Contingency", a mixing of the tribes if one is overpowering the other and winning all the immunities.
Something else of note. There hasn't been a single unanimous vote at tribal council yet (and when I say "unanimous", I mean everyone except the person going home). Michelle should be particularly concerned, because not only is she the last woman on Ravu, but she's also the only one other than Rita who voted for Anthony.

Survivor won't be on next week. It will be returning Wednesday, March 21, so don't miss it.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired March 4

On Survivor this season, I haven't been able to find anyone I want to cheer for. That is normally a bad thing, but at least there's nobody giving me a heart attack every week, Kandice and Dustin! You know I love their spirit, how they won't flinch at any of the challenges (Danielle!) and few people seem to have as much fun running this race as them. Their sense of direction, however, is truly horrifying. I get the sense though that it's more that they're not taking their time to make sure they're taking the right turn or looking for the signs they need to find.
It was a wrong turn that did them in last time. Don't be surprised to see it happen again if they don't win the race. If anyone can beat Rob and Amber. I know it's in them though. The Beauty Queens were the team who beat the Fast Forward last season!
Charla and Mirna. Huh. Their insanity and hypocrisy apparently knows no bounds. I love this team if for no other reason then that they're so freakin' crazy, and that makes for entertaining television! This leg their feud with Dustin and Kandice seems to have died down, and instead one started with Teri and Ian, particularly at an airport ticket counter. Teri and Ian (or Teran) were talking to the agent when Mirna butted in and asked him to help them, sparking off a big argument between the two teams. Mirna was clearly in the wrong here, but she and her cousin are so vastly morally superior to many of the other teams, so it didn't matter because their moral superiority automatically makes it right. I think. Hypocrisy is so confusing!
But dang it if they don't give us some great moments. They wanted to get a local man to show them directions, but he had to go to work. So they offered him $50 and dragged him to their car, and Teri and Ian said they would spit the money with them. Mirna said they'd better, and not screw them like the Beauty Queens did (who, for the record, made no such money-splitting deal). Once in the car and driving away, Charla welcomed this poor man into their scary world.
But it doesn't end there! Mirna picking up fish at the Road Block? Wonderfully nutty! Danielle's histrionics got all the attention, but Mirna was freaking out too. Whichever one of Team Guido, Joe or Bill, who did the Road Block didn't write down the full clue, something Mirna (foolishly) corrected them on, giving them the part they missed. She then spent the rest of the leg getting pissed off whenever the Guidos tried beating them to the pit stop. And then there was the Detour! After completing the white water rafting (during which Charla's face was priceless), they got to their car but couldn't find their keys. Figuring they must be at the tent they were changing in, Mirna started running back and she screamed at Charla to hurry up and come with her, because you know how important it is to have two people run back to a tent to fetch keys. And the local guy was still with them! With all the people racers have picked up and dropped off over the seasons, I wonder how many of them are still out there wandering lost, trying to get home. Nothing beats the woman who used one team (was it the Weavers in Family Edition?) to get a ride to work. That was fantastic.
Speaking of Teri and Ian, I never saw their original season, but this week I became a fan. No, it wasn't the argument with Mirna, as great as that was (and Ian calling for security was gold). No, it was when Teri went overboard on the whitewater raft. It gave us one of the best commercial cliffhangers ever on the show, even though we knew she'd survive (if anyone ever dies on a competitive reality show, there'd be massive controversy if the network decides to air it). But it was still nerve-wracking for the audience and very scary for Ian. She'd survive, but that doesn't mean she wouldn't get hurt badly enough to have to drop out of the race.
Aaaaand... She's safe! Holding on to the rope tied around the raft, Teri's head poked up no worse for wear! It turns out she actually enjoyed the experience and called it "a rush". That's when I became a fan.
Who I'm not a fan of this season is David and Mary. Well, Mary. David is too quiet to say anything to turn people against him. I don't know if we were supposed to feel sorry when she was crying about missing the Cho brothers this season, but these are all people who know that in the end, they are running the race for themselves, not some couple from Kentucky. She thought they were friends with Charla and Mirna, and she's still carrying a grudge that they had the audacity to pass them... in a race. She appreciates the chance to have this amazing experience twice, but I'm still not sure she's quite got a grip on what show she's on. Mary would fit in quite well with the Moto tribe on Survivor: Fiji, who are under the mistaken impression that they're spending 39 days at a luxury resort.
The tasks this week were fun. At the Road Block, one team member had to schlep some 80 flounders between one tank and another, and once done their clues were at the bottom of the tanks. This was how Team Guido missed part of their clue, the guy didn't write everything down. Danielle and Mirna both freaked over the fish, as mentioned earlier. This challenge even slowed down one of the stronger teams, Oswald and Danny, as Danny (I think, who pays attention to these things?) was having trouble with the sheer physicalness of the task.
The Detour, oh, the Detour. The choices were both team members climbing a forty foot cliff to get half the clue each, or taking a whitewater rafting trip to get the clue. Apparently one or two teams started trying the climbing, but this never aired so it likely didn't affect any rankings. All the teams wound up doing the rafting, which gave us moments like Teri's near-drowning and Charla's look of terror. The Beauty Queens had huge smiles on their faces doing this task, and why not? They somehow managed to move past several people!
Because they missed the Detour clue.
Damn.
This team is going to be the cause of a cardiac episode for me, just wait and see.
Kandice and Dustin missed the turn that would have taken them to the clue, because that's how they roll, but somehow managed to find the take off point for the whitewater rafting. The entire time they kept looking for the Detour clue, and at the end were surprised to find a clue that didn't have a Detour. Now normally this would be a mistake that would entail a lot of derision, but things have been shaken up in the race before, and this being the All-Star season, who knows what the producers might pull? And I like them, so I'm going to be biased. So there. Nyah.
When they arrived at the Pit Stop, Phil greeted them and let them know they arrived in fourth place, but... Oh, crap. What would happen? Time penalty? No. He couldn't check them in until they retrieved all the clues! Oh, crap! Not only did they have to go all the way back to find the clue, they were being presented with all new opportunities to get lost!
There was nothing they could do though but go back and retrieved the missing clue. How far behind were the rest of the teams? After driving back and forth who knows how many kilometres (I am Canadian, don't forget), they finally had all their clues and got back to the mat for Phil to officially pronounce them as the fourth place team. Whooooo!
David and Mary on the other hand finally ran out of luck. Without any teams willing to risk their own games to help the Kentuckians stay around, they finally came in last. It's just as well. Their naivety was charming last time around, but this time it wore thin and occasionally came across as a sense of entitlement. Now the real race can begin.
Oh yeah, Rob and Amber came in first yet again.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired March 1

Gah! These people are idiots!
But before we get to the rampant stupidity that is ruling this season, another castaway has had their game shortened due to health reasons. Whatever happened to Gary (or "Papa Smurf" as this annoyingly nick-name obsessed cast insists on calling him) when he fell in that challenge a couple of weeks ago just wasn't going away, so the medical crew was called in for a second time. Unlike their previous visit, this time they left with Gary and Jeff Probst announced later that Gary's game was over.
Unlike previous game-ending health problems, this time around there was still going to be an Immunity Challenge and Tribal Council. That's okay for Moto though. Even though they just lost their first tribe member leaving them only one person ahead of Ravu, they've got the advantage in not sucking at challenges. All they have to do is win the next immunity and they'll be back to a two person advantage. Unless they do something very moronic. What are the chances of something like that happening with this cast?
Never mind answering that. So this week, let's look at the stupidity of different groups and individuals.
Anthony is stupid. He is hanging on by a thread, so he really should be trying to avoid friction with tribemates. Why he's not trying harder in the competitions is beyond me. It's not all his fault though, as the dislike some of his tribemates have for him is affecting their ability to work with him, as evidenced by the reward challenge. Which brings us to...
The Ravu tribe is stupid. It's only 39 days on the island, and even fewer until the merge. I don't care how you feel about someone. Suck it up and work together.
"Rocky" is stupid. Just shut up.
The women are stupid. When Ravu arrived at the reward challenge, the ratio of men to women jumped right out at me. The challenges aren't just physical strength, and this strategy of keeping the men around obviously isn't working. It's time to rethink that (though they might be doing that as Anthony is likely their next to go). It's no better on Moto where two women think they have a chance in an alliance with three men. There have been strong male/female alliances in the past, but more often than not, the men stick together. Everyone who has read this blog since the start, please repeat after me... WATCH THE DAMNED SHOW! The first person voted out of Moto was yes, a woman. Not that Liliana wasn't asking for it.
Liliana is stupid. On paper it seems like a good idea. Suck up to the men, give them backrubs, use your sex appeal. Except that this never works as the women can see what you're doing and as soon as they get the chance, your ass is gone. If you're going to try flirting as a tactic, at least be subtle about it.
"Dreamz" is stupid. What the hell was that? Do you really think that there are no alliances in your tribe? Here's a hint - if you don't think there are any alliances in your tribe on Survivor, you're in HUGE trouble as that just means that nobody has approached you about one and you were too stupid to approach anyone else. Then to top that stupidity off by calling a tribal meeting and throwing out two names for elimination, not giving any thought to them as people. It's one thing for someone to think they're expendable, it's another to go out and say it in front of everyone. That's not just stupid, that's being an ass as well. He's just lucky to be a strong man or he could well have been gone this week.
The men are stupid. See "The women are stupid" above. As much as physical strength is good to have around, it's also important to have brains and a cohesive tribe. Get over yourselves already.
Moto is surprisingly very, very stupid. What the hell?!!? Probst had a sealed bottle with him this week, something that's never good, and it was to go to the winning tribe after the Immunity Challenge. What was in the bottle? A choice. Comfort or Immunity. Easy decision, right? They just lost Gary for health reasons, if they go to Tribal Council, they'll lose another tribemate which will bring them back to even numbers with Ravu. But no. The morons chose comfort! Every single one of them who voted for comfort is very stupid. You never know how safe you really are (right, "Dreamz"?) so you never want to put yourself at risk if you don't have to.
I really hope Liliana voted for comfort. And I really, really hope they lose the next immunity. How comfortable will that couch and bed be then?
They're stupidity doesn't end there. I'm trying to find good reasons for them to send the people to Exile Island that they have been, and there's been nothing consistant. Exile Island is still relatively new, this is only the third season of it, but it would be great to see a tribe use it to try and weaken their opponents. If they were just sending players they're perceiving as weak so they can have a chance at getting the hidden immunity, that would be one thing, but they sent Earl, someone nobody could call weak.
I still can't believe they chose comfort. Yeesh.
The producers are stupid. A bed! On Survivor! As if the couch and everything else at the Moto camp wasn't bad enough! Sure, it's been interesting to finally see how this has worked out, but it still takes away from the integrity of the game.
So much stupidity. Four episodes in and there is nobody I want to cheer on to win. That's not a good sign. That doesn't make the season horrible to watch though. It just means fewer highs and lows. It is unfortunate that the only reason to cheer against certain people or tribes is to see their idiocy hurt them.
I'm not big on alcohol, but I need a drink after watching this one...

P.S. It seems there are people out there not sure what it was that snake was regurgitating (I just read the Survivors Strike Back blog at CBS.com, and two people there were asking). It was shedding its old skin. If you look back, you'll see its old skin collapse once it was left it. It was fascinating and disgusting all at once! Dang, biology is awesome.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired February 25

Holy crap, that was an emotional roller coaster! I was laughing, cheering, and on the edge of my seat preparing for disaster!
Yet for such a great and scary episode, I'm not sure where to start writing. Hmmmm.
Okay, I didn't watch Charla and Mirna's original season, so I have to admit I'm a little surprised by how clearly insane they are, especially Mirna who freaked out over our beloved Beauty Queens following them when she and her cousin paid a cab driver to lead them to their next destination. It was going to take all their money! The Miss Americas should at least pay half!!! FINE! WE'LL JUST SIT HERE!!! Yes, this standard Amazing Race strategy of following someone else was so horrifying that Mirna and Charla were willing to throw the game in order to stop it from happening.
It didn't get any better for them after the Beauty Queens left them and the cabbie refused to take them any further. Do you blame him? How could he not be sure this crazy woman wasn't trying to get him to lead her somewhere secluded to murder him on camera? It didn't help when she started shouting and throwing her fanny pack with all the money at him.
If her Amazing Race experience doesn't end with Mirna getting an ambassador position somewhere, something is horribly wrong with the world.
The cherry on top of this whole insane sundae was Charla telling us how much more moral she and Mirna were than, that beauty is only skin deep and she made some snarky comment about plastic surgery.
I don't know what Kandice and Dustin are like at the pit stops, but this is now two races in a row they've managed to stir up a lot of antipathy from other teams. I always hate to accuse haters of jealousy (I got so sick of that in Big Brother 6), but I'm wondering if some of these teams might not be a little jealous that the Beauty Queens rock so much.
At least they're entertaining. I never watched Kevin and Drew's original season, but I have to think they were a whole heck of a lot better than they were this season. Either they were more fun in either a good or a bumbling way, or they were much, much better racers. This is All-Stars, and all I'm going to remember of them are two bald men who moved slowly and complained a lot. Hell, I can just look at my husband for that.
If I had a husband, but the concept amused me.
Now Drew, or Kevin (which was which?), did have some bad luck with his fall and never did seem to recover, but that doesn't excuse them taking a spot that could have gone to Lori and Bolo or, dare I say, Jonathan and Victoria.
I'm sure they have their fans, or they never would have been back, but I'm not going to miss them. I do hope that Kevin, or Drew (whichever one it was) is feeling better now.
Just as I won't miss Mary and David when their time comes. How was that for a segue, huh? Pretty smoooooth. And it helps to distract you from noticing that we're not finished this thing, yet I just gave away the ending. Anyway, Mary and David, or more specifically, Mary. She didn't take it too well when Mirna and Charla's car passed them late in the leg. She missed the Cho brothers from last season who would wait for her and even gave her team a Fast Forward. But these sanctimonious bitches zipped right past them, like this was a race or something! Well, that's the end of that alliance! We didn't even get a cool nickname for them like "the Back Pack".
Expecting people to let them stay in the race ahead of them was cutely naive for once season. Two in a row? Not so much. This is where All-Stars seasons or second chances can really come back to hurt what goodwill someone has built up with the audience in their first appearance on a show. I loved Stephenie on both seasons of Survivor, but she lost a lot of fans in Guatemala (strangely enough, it was completely the opposite with Janelle on Big Brother where I was one of the few fans she lost).
But all the last place teams aside, there was a lot of excitement this week between Rob and Amber, Oswald and Danny, and Kandice and Dustin.
My heart sank when Romber and Oswanny caught a flight ahead of everyone else. Oh no! But then their flight was horribly delayed and they arrived last! Oh yes! It's bound to happen sooner or later, and while flights have been delayed before on the show, it just doesn't happen nearly enough.
At the Road Block, Dustin pulled into the lead for Miss Realivision 2007 (coming this spring on Realivision, where Miss Realivision 2006 Melissa Witek will pass on the crown to Kandice or Dustin following a gala show sponsored by Motorola and Ask.com) when she kicked butt and got the answer for the next clue faster than anyone. Oh yes! In fact, some players were so bad at this task that Romber and Oswanny caught up to the pack! Oh no!
Then came the Detour, and things didn't get any better. Romber and Oswanny finished first and got to the Pit Stop in first and second place. Oh crap!
We got to see some teams make mistakes that held them back, but not the Beauty Queens, yet somehow they were one of the last teams finished. I don't know why they did so poorly here. They are capable of doing so much better.
If that wasn't bad enough, something horrible happened on the way to the Pit Stop. At one crucial fork in the road, instead of turning left, they turned right. Oooooh crap. Two episodes in, and we're going to see a repeat of last season where it was a missed turn that did them in.
Honestly, my heart had dropped so much by this point. I was cheering when that flight was delayed and when Kandice got that clue, but now the roller coaster was at the low point of the night. That was, until the other cars started turning the same way, following the Beauty Queens as they turned right, but not so quickly following them when they discovered they were going the wrong way around went back in the opposite direction.
And so for the second leg in a row, the Miss Realivision 2007 finalists finished sixth. That's okay. They made a mistake, but this time it didn't knock them out of the game. No, it was Kevin and Drew we said goodbye to. Goodbye, mighty bald men.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired February 22

Ravu confuses me. I really don't know what's going through this tribe's minds. Other than season one when Richard Hatch created the concept of alliances, when has a tribe been this fractured this repeatedly at tribal council? Now I'm not saying that's a bad thing from an entertainment perspective, but it becomes more obvious every week that this tribe has no idea how to play this game. There hasn't been a single unanimous vote so far this season, and 14 seasons in, this is a very unusual thing to see.
It's a weird thing. I've been driven crazy in the past by the incessant need for people to vote with the majority, and it's kinda nice to see a tribe not worry about that, but there seems to be no strategy at all in anything they do.
But more on the divided tribe. First, let's look at the losing tribe that can't pull out a win to save their lives.
On the slip'n'slide challenge... What the hell? You really need this win! This isn't the time to be taking dainty little steps. Watch the people who fling themselves onto the slide and follow suit! That way, even if you can't get the ball into the basket at the end, nobody can accuse you of not trying and you'll look like you really want to win the challenge. I'm particularly thinking of Syvlia, but she wasn't the only one who didn't try hard enough.
In the immunity challenge, Ravu had people taking dainty little bites and making sure the food was completely chewed before swallowing. There isn't time for that! Get it into small enough chunks to get past your gullet and swallow hard! If you start to choke, there are people standing by who can give you the Heimlich!
Before this, the most losingest tribe we ever saw was Ulong on Survivor: Palau (Stephenie and Bobby Jon's first season). They made it all the way to the merge without winning a single immunity, but for the most part, they at least tried in the challenges and were able to pick up a reward or two.
Tangent time. I will argue to my dying breath that Angie in that tribe got screwed. In the challenges, it was consistantly the women in that tribe that stepped up and gave the competition a run for their money, particularly Stephenie and Angie. Yet the stereotype that you need manly strength to win challenges held out despite the evidence to the contrary. When it's the men who keep costing you wins, it's time to look at getting rid of them. Particularly, in that season, James.
Which brings up another issue. One thing you need in Survivor is a good, strong alliance. There's no argument there. However, that alliance is going to be no good to you if it's not going to get you anywhere. Angie was hurt by the sexism inherent in thinking you need manly men to win, but she was also hurt by not being part of the alliance, the alliance that was going to be no good to anyone if it doesn't make it to the merge fairly intact. There's no point of loyalty in a game if that loyalty is going to cost you the game (as opposed to real life, for the record). James should have been cut loose and Angie brought in. If this had happened, there would have been a much better chance of more than just Stephenie making the merge.
Another great example of needing to get rid of alliance members earlier than one would have liked was in Vanuatu. It was also a great example of changing strategy when it needs to be changed, and for keeping an eye on your alliance members instead of just trusting that they'll stick to the plan. And don't be so stuck on getting one person out that it's going to cost you the game (but start voting out your alliance before getting rid of all your opposition either unless you really need to). When Scout and Twila started showing signs of disgruntlement, they should have been kicked out of the alliance and Eliza brought in. Instead, they got together with the sole remaining man, Chris, and got to Eliza first. Even though she didn't particularly like them, they made her feel safer than the others did and that helped turn the numbers away from Aimee's alliance, and that gave the game to Chris who got to the end against all odds.
So why am I spending so much time looking at past seasons, other than for the lessons they have to impart? Well, I hate to say this, so far this has been the most boring season yet. At least when Ulong was losing, they had tribe members you could cheer on. Three episodes into Fiji and there's still nobody I care about. Ravu is an underdog, but they are seriously lacking the spunk or any other redeeming qualities that would make me want to see them persevere.
Even though we know little about the people on Moto because they do keep winning, we at least have had "Boo" and his accident prone ways to enjoy, but at the immunity challenge this week he showed himself to be a sanctimonious twit over a little smack talk from a tribe that needs to win and could use a little psychology against their opponents to help them do it.
However, who would have thought that the first member of Moto to risk leaving the game because of injury would be Gary? He took a pretty bad fall in the first competition, resulting in him being unable to breathe properly. Suspecting a broken rib or worse, the medics were called in to check him out and they passed him as healthy enough to keep playing. He managed to do quite well in the eating competition, but judging by the previews for next week, it's not looking good.
It'll take a lot for Survivor to match Treasure Hunters though. That show had only one season, yet they managed to have two game ending injuries and one game inhibiting injury (if you didn't watch Treasure Hunters or follow Realivision's fine recaps (my pride and joy of my recaps, I must say), then you missed Miss Realivision 2006, Melissa Witek, playing with a hairline fracture in her arm). Damn, it would be nice to have a Kayte Fogal on this season of Survivor. She made my job so much easier.
So how broken is Ravu as a tribe? First there was "Rocky" coming up with an idea, but instead of presenting it to the group like a normal person, he had to make it clear that he wasn't trying to be a leader, he's just throwing it out there, and they can decided if they think it's a good idea or not. This hatred of leaders thing is pathetic. It's one thing if the person who tries to step up is a horrendous leader, but it's another because everyone loathes being told what to do. This tribe deserves to be decimated.
Where does the tribe stand on who to vote out? Mookie was pissed with Anthony's performance during the immunity challenge, so he wanted to see him gone. Then there was the contigent who still wanted to say goodbye to Sylvia. "Rocky" put it out there that she might have the hidden immunity idol, and it wouldn't be a bad idea to put a few votes towards Anthony so that if Sylvia does have the idol, the vote will then deflect to him. It was actually not a bad idea, and one would like to think that's why the vote went the way it did, but with this tribe at this point, you really have to suspect the worst.
Perhaps the most bizarre moment was Rita talking about making a move, then being the only person to vote against Earl. I really don't understand this tribe.
Well, if the split vote was part of a plan in case Sylvia had the hidden idol, it was for naught as she was indeed immunity idol-free. Even tough she was the underdog on a tribe of underdogs, I'm not going to miss her. She didn't play to stay other than some half-hearted digging for the idol, so having her leave is no loss.
If I'm mistaken and the split votes were the plan, then I'd like to apologize to Ravu for thinking they're completely useless as a tribe.
There was one bright spot for Ravu. Michelle, who I don't care for thanks to her entirely uncalled for and unexpectedly intense hatred for Sylvia, was able to start a fire without flint thanks to the use of a pair of spectacles. It's about time someone's glasses were put to this use! As long as a tribe has lenses, barring nothing but cloudy or rainy days, there is no excuse for them to go without fire.

The Amazing Race: All-Stars - Aired February 18

It was with some trepidation that I approached the All-Stars season of The Amazing Race. Would it be the abomination that Survivor: All-Stars and Big Brother: All-Stars were? Rob and Amber are participating, so that's not a good start (though to be fair, they are actually really good at this game, and very nearly won last time). The big thing working in favour of Amazing Racing skipping the All-Star curse is that it's a much different game, and it's never really been about alliances so any pre-season alliances made won't make much difference. The very nature of the show also makes it that much harder for the producers to tip it in favour of any particular contestants.
I didn't come to The Amazing Race until several seasons in, a mistake I now regret. However, the advantage to that is that I'm not familiar with some of the teams which helps alleviate one of the other problems of All-Star seasons - getting sick of seeing some of the faces. Realivision is once again firmly in the corner of the Beauty Queens, Dustin and Kandice, but with teams we don't know it's entirely possible we may end up endorsing another team before the end. I hope not, as it would be great to see an all-female team win, but that also depends on how far the Beauty Queens make it. Speaking of which, last season I kept referring to them as Team Miss America. To avoid confusion, I will use the same team name everyone else does. Beauty Queens, or BQs, it is.
It's nice to see some teams in action that I've only heard of, and some that I've never heard of (John Vito and Jill?) so it's a little like an All-Star season and brand new teams all in one.
One of the teams is very much brand spanking new. If you remember the Frat Boys from a couple of seasons back, one of them is back and dating half of another team from his season, Danielle. No, I couldn't remember who she was either. Her team went out fourth I believe, and she's likely here because she's dating Eric. I know! I'm surprised he's with a woman too! Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Not that anyone should care, but who am I familiar with this season? There are the aforementioned Beauty Queens, Romber, Eric, and even Danielle a little. Didn't her team dress in pink a lot? There is Kentucky (Mary and David), and the only winners invited back, Uchenna and Joyce. I wasn't watching the show yet, but I did see one episode with Charla and Mirna when they first appeared. It's possible that may have been to see how former Big Brother House Guest Alison was doing, but if I remember correctly, Mirna had somewhat of a crush on host Phil Keoghan. Oh Phil, I've missed you.
It was season six when I started watching The Amazing Race, and what a season to start. I was cheering on Lori and Bolo, but one of the greatest reality villains was born that year with Jonathan, of Jonathan and Victoria screaming at each other fame. How could I have missed out on five wonderful seasons of this?
That means coming into this I have no idea who Kevin and Drew, Oswald and Danny, John Vito and Jill, Teri and Ian, or Joe and Bill are. That's almost half the teams! Throw Danielle in, and it's 50/50.
One of the things you'd think would change this season is that people would learn more from the past. If a clue says "North Entrance", you really don't want to be trying out the South Entrance. "Oh, it might work!" NO IT WON'T! Some map reading skills would have been a good thing to pick up, and learning some of the different languages would be invaluable, though this first leg took them to a Spanish-speaking country, and every racer knows "Rapido!" by heart, and they all seem fond of repeating it over and over again.
We didn't see too much of Team Realivision... um, the BQs and that's a mixed blessing. On the one hand, they weren't likely to be eliminated. On the other, they're probably going to be in the middle of the pack for now. That's okay, they came in 6th and that's far better than last. Until there are only six teams, that is.
One moment they had on screen was interesting. Kentucky, or Mary in particular, seemed to like them even less now than when they were racing last. I'm only guessing here, but maybe she didn't like how they were against Team Alabama, Kentucky's fellow Back Pack alliance chums. Get over it, Mary. Kandice and Dustin were there to race, not participate in a box social spanning multiple continents.
It was a hoot to see Mary trying to play dirty by lying to the BQs about which airplane was the best to catch then immediately whispering to the team behind them, sending them scurrying off to another ticket counter. I didn't know you had it in you, Mary. This is the same woman who seemed to think that last season was The Amazing Stroll Through A Park Making Friends.
Ooooooh, I know I'm so going to piss off Mary and David fans before this is over. Hey, I enjoyed watching them try to change their game. I just don't want them to win, even though it's very unlikely they will. If they do though, good for them. Spunky Kentuckians, that's what they are. Spunky Kentuckians. It was cute watching them get all star-struck over Rob and Amber, and even a little over Mirna and Charla (who in turn were a little star-struck by them).
Airport shenanigans are one of the greatest things about The Amazing Race. You have to wonder though if there are ticket agents just for the players sometimes, because it seemed like the teams at the American Airlines counter were flanked by lines on both sides, yet there was one agent suspiciously unencumbered by work. But there's no way the producers have any pull at airports, eh, Joyce and Uchenna?
The Detour seemed a little too easy. The choice was anyway. Search a field for items that include a button, or cut some horse hooves and hair? Why Rob and Amber thought that the searching option might make more sense, well, it makes no sense. Not one other team thought it was a good idea, and it wasn't. Every one of them became equine estheticians. So the Detour was easy. Finding it, not so much.
What this leg came down to was being able to find the North Entrance of that whatever-it-was park in a timely manner. Many teams were unable to do this, John Vito and Jill least of all. I really wouldn't have put money on them being last. Kentucky, sure. Charla and Mirna, maybe. With a painful fall suffered by one of the bald men (I can't tell them apart yet), Kevin and Drew seemed the best bet. But all it takes to lose the Race is one wrong turn, one piece of bad luck. Heck, John Vito and Jill were so lost, a team with a blown tire were able to beat them.
There isn't too much to talk about yet. A lot of people running and one challenge. The drama will come soon enough.
Let the anger go, Mary. Just let it go.

Survivor: Fiji - Aired February 15

One of the problems with the early episodes in any season of Survivor is that most of the time we don't have any emotional connection to any of the contestants yet. We just got over the excitement of the premiere and learning what new things we're going to see this time around, but we don't really know anyone yet. At the start of the hour there were still 18 people left, and who is there yet to cheer on or to boo?
Yes, there are people you can kind of like, and people who sort of annoy, but no real heroes or villains yet. Luckily we still have two tribes full of bone-headed contestants who have no idea how to play the game to keep us entertained, and the most accident-prone Survivor ever. Despite his annoying nickname, I may just have to cheer on "Boo" to see if he actually survives.
Before I go any further, I should say I wasn't fully focused on the show. Maybe it was because I don't care about any of them yet, maybe it's because second episodes are rarely keepers. All I know is that if I don't remember things that happened, I'm sorry. It also means this may end up being a fairly short post. We'll see at the end. But right now I'm just typing away hoping I think of something to say about the episode other than that I think Erica has the best 'fro we've seen on television in decades. Seriously, I love her hair. Her, on the other hand, not so much. Is she capable of cracking a smile? Even when she found the pineapples, her joy didn't seem to last long. Yes, we only see a small portion of what goes on with the castaways because we (thankfully) don't have live feeds à la Big Brother, so maybe she's only grumpy during those moments worth televising.
Sylvia finally arrived to join her new tribemates in Ravu, and it was obvious from the start that she was screwed by the twist last week. Her personality may have had her still in the firing line for elimination, but she would have had more of a chance than this time on Exile Island cost her. Really, Sylvia, these people just spent a couple of days bonding. They may not be giving you any chance to be part of the team, but you should still try by keeping quiet. The woman has no idea how to play the social aspect of this game. With rare and usually charismatic exceptions (I still don't get the Terry love from Panama), nobody on this show likes people who try to be leaders. Hell, they'd rather starve, freeze, and lose challenges than have someone try to step up and lead. Really, what the hell is up with people on Survivor and the leader hate? "I don't like anyone telling me what to do!" I know, I bitched about it last week too. I still don't get it.
If you're joining the tribe late, even if you think there should be a leader, don't try to be that leader. They already see you as an interloper. If you're an interloper who is trying to change the group dynamic, you're just sealing your own fate. Not that I had any doubts about her inability to play the social game, but when Sylvia spoke up at tribal council about how they should elect a leader right after everyone complained about her trying to be one, I wanted to slap her. Don't do exactly what everyone says they hate when you're sitting at tribal council!
Oh yeah, Ravu lost the immunity challenge again. That makes them underdogs, but they're far from plucky. But I want to get back to Sylvia, who was very lucky in surviving the vote.
It doesn't matter that she was right and the tribe does need a leader to help keep them focused, there is no way she is going to win this season. However, there is no reason she can't go much farther than anyone expects. The problem with that though is that it depends on some of her tribemates playing a smart game. She's got no chance. But let's pretend that there might be some capable strategists on the island. How can Sylvia benefit them? Depending on how intelligent and self-aware she really is, she should know that she is the next in line to go, barring anyone else screwing up massively (or not so massively, as we saw this week). If she wants to stay, she should know that would be up to an alliance taking her in. The only real alliance we've seen fell apart and was whittled down to one person after two tribal councils, so that's something these players really need to work on. Especially those that may not be feeling the safest. Sylvia is a vote that could sway things in your favour, and she should be grateful for any alliance that will take her in right now. Not only that, if things take a turn for the worst, she would be an easy choice to vote out first.
I don't care how much you don't like her, Michelle. She can be very useful to you. And there is another issue I have with Survivor. It's only 39 days, and it's for a million dollars. Hell, I'll share a tent with Ann Coulter and Paris Hilton for a month if it means I can win a million bucks! "I hate her so I'm going to write her name down because I don't care about the majority and I'm a pathetic whiner!" Oh, shut up Michelle. That one sentence put her right at the top of the list of people I'd gladly see eliminated.
A lot of viewers are enjoying Yau-Man, and I did at first too, but he's coming across to me as desperate to please so that he won't see his name written down, and that's just not pleasant. When Sylvia arrived at the beach, he gave her a big hug, and he used that opportunity to get a peak in her bag to see if she had the hidden immunity idol. That was a fairly good idea, but at the same time it crossed a line I think I wouldn't even cross on the show by invading her privacy. I had to say it was a fairly good idea, but unless Sylvia's not too bright, it was a pointless exercise. If you had the hidden idol, would you have it on top of everything in your bag where a quick peek could expose it? That's right, Yau-Man. The only way to tell is to really invade her privacy and dig through her bag when she's not looking.
We didn't see too much of Moto this week, a sure sign of which tribe is going to lose immunity, but besides "Boo" and his injury prone ways, we got to see "Dreamz" talking about how it's not so bad on Survivor, and how it's still much cushier than being homeless. I'd have to agree with him, but at the same time, it brings up a point about how much the show has eased up on the castaways. A couch? A couch isn't Survivor! Plans and materials for a shelter? I do like that the show keeps trying to change things up, so I'm really hoping this haves vs. have-nots twist pays off. It doesn't seem to be making any difference right now though. And at least Ravu still hasn't got fire. Theirs is still a more authentic Survivor experience, and I wish "Dreamz" was on that tribe as I'd be seriously interested to see how that compares to actual homelessness.
It would be nice to see the show go back to the harshness of its early days. Back then "Survivor" really lived up to its name. Unfortunately there were nutrition issues back then, so the producers do have to be far more careful about that. In the end it is only a game show.
I'm trying to remember back to the early episodes on previous seasons. The premiere always only has an immunity challenge because it's already a packed hour. Am I wrong in thinking that episode two on almost always has a reward challenge and an immunity challenge? Okay, I just checked CBS.com and episode two of Cook Islands had them both as one, but episode two of Amazon had separate challenges. I'm not going to try to pinpoint the season this changed, but I wonder why it did. It could have been a cost issue, or maybe they were trying to not go through too many challenge ideas per season. Or, and this is the potential reason I like, they want to give us more of a chance to know the castaways early on. Especially considering tribes are bigger now than they were in the beginning.
Ravu made a good showing at the challenge and had the lead all the way through until it came time for the puzzle. Then they didn't do so well, and Erica screaming didn't help. It didn't help them win, but did it really cause them to lose? She wasn't screaming last week and they still lost on the puzzle.
This is one of those places where the reasoning in tribes really annoys me. Every season, pre-merge, all they really think about is needing strength for the challenges. Yes, that's an important factor, but nobody ever seems to talk about the need for intelligence. Ravu had the lead up until the puzzle, but at no point did they talk about weeding out stupid tribemates. Yet we always hear about sending the weak ones home. Granted, if I was there I'd want a lot of stupid tribemates. The smart ones are the bigger threats for that million. Unfortunately, I don't think that's why the subject is never brought up.
I said that I didn't think Erica's screaming didn't cost them the challenge. I really don't think it did. However, the frustration that led to the screaming, that is not good. Going into the challenges, you want people who can keep a level head. Frustration has cost many a tribe a challenge throughout the series. It kills teamwork, and it rubs off on everyone else.
It was really a 50/50 choice when it came to the vote. Erica's frustration can be deadly in a challenge, and they desperately need to win a challenge right now. Sylvia brings out a very ugly side of some of her tribemates, and if people are wasting energy thinking about how much they don't like her, they're not going to be effective in the game (though I'd say get rid of those who are so thrown off by one person). What it came down to was "Rocky" and someone else, I really can't remember who because so few castaways are particularly memorable right now, looking ahead to the merge and who will be a bigger threat later on. I like that, but there does need to be balance. It doesn't matter if you get rid of all the threats for individual immunity now if your numbers are so depleted by the merge that you will be picked off one by one. It doesn't necessarily mean you won't win the grand prize, as Yul from Cook Islands or Chris from Vanuatu can attest. All it means is that your job will be that much tougher.
So Erica was voted off, much to her surprise. As with last week, it wasn't unanimous (not including the losing castaway's vote). Despite her seething hatred for Sylvia, Michelle still wrote Erica's name down, but Anthony voted for Sylvia. Six days in, it's a little more reasonable to have more loyalty to someone, but if you're going to be that loyal where you will go against the majority, shouldn't you be loyal enough to warn your friend that they are in danger so that they have a chance to plead their case, or at least not be blindsided? If you're not going to do that, not writing their name down is a pretty empty gesture.

I am so glad that Survivor airs on Thursdays. The Amazing Race: All-Stars premieres this Sunday, making it three shows I cover on one night. Joy.