The Apprentice L.A. - Wrap Up

The fundamental flaw with The Apprentice, other than Donald Trump being a complete ass as a human being, is that the competition is for a job while most of the tasks have no relation to that job at all. If you go in to interview for an accountant position, nobody asks you to bake a pie. You may have to cook some books, but pastries don't come up in the equation at all.
I don't watch America's or Canada's Next Top Model, and I don't watch Project Runway, but I do know that all the tasks in the form require modelling, and all the tasks in the latter require designing clothes. Granted, it would be fun to make them balance a ledger, but that would have nothing to do with the ultimate goal.
Granted, there are things you can learn from watching people perform in Apprentice tasks. Hard working or lazy? Works well with others? A good leader AND a good follower? Quick and creative thinker?
I've never overseen the construction of a building, but I suspect the creative thinking required isn't quite like the creative thinking in putting together a commercial or advertising event. There's a reason companies have departments specifically for marketing.
That said, I'm still disappointed in Heidi. Since I last updated this show, Heidi had won another task as Project Manager, and when it came to measuring up to her previous performances sitting beside Trump, she hit the mark and I thought she had this competition sewn up.
That is, until she teamed up with Frank. The final six got together in teams of two and each had to come up with presentation for a new Trump Towerish Thing, and Heidi and Frank's presentation sucked. The video was nothing, there was no theme, and Heidi wasn't preparted at all to present what they did have, which wasn't like her at all. The thing with the boardroom is, if you have a horrible task but shined throughout the competition up until then, you should be able to save your own butt. Unfortunately for Heidi, sitting across from The Donald instead of beside him, and on the defensive at that, she crashed and burned.
What she needed to do was to admit to screwing up in this task without humming and hawing, without trying to excuse it, just admit to the screw-up but then stand on your record. It might not have worked, but at least it would have been a lot less disappointing for those of us who were behind her.
Kristine was also fired at the same time for not doing well enough on her task (and wasn't given enough time to defend herself, from what we saw, and even with editing she seemed shocked to not have more of a chance). The good news was that both of them took the firing well, having a bit of a laugh and regretting not teaming up with each other (Kristine wanted to prove herself without Heidi). At least they left us with a positive impression.
But there was bad news as well. With those two gone, there was no more original Kinetic, the only people left were the buffoons of Arrow. Crap.
Even crappier than who made the final four was that it was only going to be a final four. Based on this and his other show, Survivor, it seems that executive producer Mark Burnett has found himself with a fetish with groups at the end instead of a final two. For two seasons now, Survivor has had a final three (more on that when I write my Surivor: Fiji entry, which will come after The Amazing Race which will be next), and now The Apprentice gives us a final four going to the final boardroom. It just doesn't work, because it doesn't remove the last people you know don't have a chance, and it's a little cruel because it gives them false hope. Trump may like you, Frank, but you really don't think you were in the running, do you?
However, I could have lived with the lameness of final four if it wasn't for the absolute suckiness of the final task. Instead of the standard bringing together of a charity event, the final task was... making a commercial. Something they've already done for a task, but this one was for movie theatres! Oooh! Nope, sorry, that's a load of crap for a final task. There was no tension, one deadline, no large numbers of people to impress and organize. It was a friggin' commercial. Seriously, am I getting across how horrible a choice I thought this was? Maybe previous final tasks meant they weren't able to get corporate sponsors willing to let them get together two charity events again, but they should have at least come up with their own.
It was a lame ending to a pretty lame season. I really hope this isn't the one they go out on.
Even though it was a final four, it still got whittled down in the boardroom to a final two as the losing team from the lame final task was fired, and it came down to James versus Stephanie.
I didn't care much for James. There was arrogance in him with a dash of hypocrisy (don't make me search for it, but I believe he was complaining about Frank doing exactly the same thing he did a couple of tasks earlier). But Stephanie was pretty much the Invisible Woman all season, and she never once stepped up as Project Manager. As much as she struck me as someone more grounded and ready for the job, never being PM should have been her death knell.
Then Trump told James that James had said something he didn't like, but didn't elaborate it but he said that he knew what he was talking about. I don't know what it was, maybe James stood up and proclaimed himself a Rosie O'Donnell fan, and that the comedian and talk show host has as much right as any other citizen to stand up and speak her beliefs, despite what appears to be a successful conservative effort to demonize and marginalize her. Don't like what Rosie's saying? Shout her down and belittle her! Nobody wants to listen to a fat, ugly pig!
Sorry, this whole thing has been a sore point with me lately, and Trump has been at the forefront of it. I'll keep trying not to get too political in these pages.
All that matters is that Stephanie did something I thought would have been impossible. She won the season without once being Project Manager. I don't know if it would have been possible in a normal season, but this one did have the twist of the winning PM staying in the job until they lose. That does make it more difficult to get the position, but I will still argue that you should fight for the job whenever you get the chance. If the show does manage to come back, I doubt we will ever see someone who has never been PM win again.
I'm not sure how I feel about the winning PM keeping the job, as twists go it's not the best but it's not the worst. I do like that they sit in the boardroom beside Trump as it gives us a chance to see how well they do in that situation. And damn it, nobody did better there this season than Heidi.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 25

Okay, another short one while I play catch up.

This episode began with Kinetic being down by two members. As far as Trump was concerned, this was akin to them being "decimated". I could go back and look at who won what task, or try to remember, but a little simple math and the memory of one event will help us. A while back, Arrow was on a losing streak so a member of Kinetic had to go over to their team. That was Surya. Now if Surya stayed on his original team, they would have only been down by one. So this "decimated" team has only lost one more task than their rivals.
That didn't matter. Trump wanted to even them out. James, as the current project manager, was told to find a volunteer and if nobody stepped forward, he was to choose someone.
Not only was Arrow on a bit of a winning streak, these are two very different teams with very different approaches, so nobody wanted to do it. I never did grasp what convoluted reasoning James used, but he picked Nicole to go over. You know, the one with the nascent romance with Tim. Nicole wasn't at all pleased that Tim didn't fight to keep her on Arrow or that James got rid of her so quickly and easily, so she wanted nothing more than to beat those two in the next task. And a little coochie coochie with Tim.
She wasn't about to be project manager though. Things were shaky for Angela after the last task, and being the only remaining member from the original Kinetic still in the competition who hasn't been PM, it was her turn to step up.
The task this time around was to sell passes to Universal Studios Hollywood. There really wasn't much to do on this one. Pick a strategy and go with it. Kinetic chose to sell on rollerskates (not rollerblades, as Ivanka kept saying), and Arrow went with a table and signs.
Usually the tasks take place in separate locations for the different teams, but this time they were all in the same place and competing for the same customers. Arrow was out for blood, at times outraging Kinetic with their tactics. They're competing to work for Donald Trump though. I've got a tiny, niggling feeling that he's just a wee bit not bothered by a little dirty play as long as it wins the task.
And in this case, it did win the task and by a very comfortable margin. I actually liked the rollerskate idea better because it was a lot more fun, but you can't argue with results.
The reward for winning was a helicopter ride over Los Angeles. Followed by a ferris wheel, some cotton candy, and balloons for everyone. No, I kid. The helicopter ride would be cool.
For the boardroom, eeeeeehhhhhhhhh... The problem is the idea wasn't that bad, and it wasn't that they lost the task through horrible choices or disruptive teammates, they were just beat by a better idea. Heidi and Kristine were safe short of doing something very stupid in the boardroom.
Speaking of Heidi, yet again, How Did The Winning Project Manager Compare to Heidi?
James improved his performance greatly this week. He didn't look as sweaty being there (though there was a sheen), and he did come out and ask a question confidently and forcefully. It was even a decent question. It was only one question, but he did it well. On a Heidi scale of 10, I'll give James a good 8.5 for the job he did. Well done! Lose the sheen, you'd get a 9. Ask another question or two, and don't sound so angry, you'd even better yet.
So Heidi and Kristine were safe. The only reason Nicole might be in danger is that being the new kid on the team, the others might be able to put some of the blame on her. Unfortunately for Angela though, this was one of those challenges where, despite the HUGE gap in money made (it was a good $7000), nobody really deserved to go so it had to be the project manager who had the final say in all decisions.
See? A short entry. Luckily it happened with a week where there wasn't too much to say mostly because I really don't care about the Tim/Nicole relationship woes. For that to intrigue me, they'd have had to make me care about them as individuals in the first place. Granted, they're nowhere near as annoying as Frank, but they're not really charming me over to their side.
Gads, I can't wait for Frank to leave.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 18

Donald Trump is no stranger to hyperbole, but when the potential Apprentices met him on the set of NBC's soap opera Passions, he reached either a new high or low, depending on how you want to look at it. Either way, it was funny. It's obvious that The Apprentice is pre-taped, and this particular season was done some time ago, when The Donald referred to the recently cancelled Passions as one of "NBC's top-rated shows". As far as soaps go, this one has been a basement dweller since its inception, and now its end is coming.
It was an awesome moment made all that much better by the fact that the task, while related to soap operas, had nothing to do with the goings on in Harmony. Yeah, I watched Passions when it first came out, but the story lines dragged on for so friggin' long I lost patience and now I just stick to Days Of Our Lives.
The task this week was to make a 45 second "webisode" for Soft Scrub Deep Clean Foaming Cleanser. All I want to know is will it make me feel clean again after just plugging it? So dirty... So very dirty... Won't wash off! Now I know how the executives who would be judging this feel.
After he came close to being fired last week, Arrow's James decided the best thing for him to do would be to step up and be the project manager. This always happens when someone has a tough boardroom, but nobody should be letting themselves get into that position in the first place. You shouldn't be stepping into the PM role because now you feel you have something to prove. You should be clamouring for it from the start of the game, and you should be doing your damnedest to make sure Trump has no reason to fire you even if you lose, and I don't mean by covering your ass. Yes, if you have doubts about your team's approach to a task, air them early on, but once that's done, dig in and work as hard and as well as your can.
Over at Kinetic, Kristine got to remain PM after her win last week. She lucked into the half-time show, something she's done before, but now she has to create an entertaining and informative 45 second story, something outside her comfort zone.
The problems she had with Muna last week surfaced again, with Muna questioning things again and not wanting to work behind the camera. Allowing her to be one of the performers was a mistake on both their parts. When trying to communicate with an audience through a webcast, clarity is the most important thing and as cool as Muna's accent is, it's not the right thing to have on camera for this task in this format.
That wasn't Kristine's only mistake though. While Heidi and Muna were busy filming, she and Angela went out to do some shopping. Why? What is it about shopping that Angela couldn't have done by herself? Without a director behind the camera, things were not going well.
The only thing that might save Kinetic was Arrow's particularly lame production. We've discovered from this experience that not only can nobody on Arrow act, their idea of a performance is TALKING VERY LOUD!
"HEY HONEY, LOOK WHAT I DID! I CLEANED THE BATHROOM WITH THIS NEW SOFT SCRUB CLEANSER!"
"WONDERFUL! I'VE JOINED THE FOREIGN LEGION!"
"EMILY, NOOOOOO!"
"ENJOY YOUR CLEAN BATHROOM, BRICK!"
Despite how atrocious their production was, Arrow was very pleased with it in the editing room. No so much with Kinetic, where Muna was so hard to understand in places that they had to edit out quite a bit just to make their webisode someone understandable. I don't know what their time limit was, or what resources they had available, but I was wondering if there was any way they could have dubbed over it all. Heck, if things were so far lost, I would have tried a comedic approach and dubbed the whole thing over in Spanish with obviously mismatched lipsynching then put in English subtitles.
Unfortunately, because so much was cut out, Kinetic also lost a lot of the product placement. If they had Kristine in front of the camera, they might well have won this task by having a more entertaining production, but they didn't and Arrow won this week.
Arrow's reward for winning was to fly to Sacramento in a private jet and meet the governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Honestly, there was a time where I thought that would have been cool to meet him, but not so much anymore. They enjoyed it though.
The firing was obviously going to be between Kristine and Muna, though you never know what could set off Trump in the boardroom. For the first time ever, we really saw a crack in Heidi's boardroom performance. When Trump asked her who she thought should be fired, she tried so hard to be diplomatic and not hurt the feelings of anyone she liked, she frustrated The Donald who just wanted her to make a decision.
Considering that he asked her what's happened, that she started out as a superstar but has been on the losing team way too often now, this wasn't the time for her to be diplomatic. When Trump asks you who should be fired, give him a name. If you must, say, "I have a lot of respect for her, but I would fire Muna." Trump liked Muna, and he did see how Kristine cost her team this task. However, Muna certainly contributed to the loss too. So with a tough decision on his mind, let's give him time to think as we look at our weekly feature, How Did The Winning Project Manager Compare to Heidi?
James was another quiet one. He did ask a question without prompting from Trump, always a good thing, but it was just one question. His comfort level didn't seem to be where it could be sitting at The Hair's side. A middling performance, not one that said, "There's The Apprentice!"
In the end, Muna paid the price for the loss this week. She didn't go out as angry as Aimee, but she wasn't as fine with the firing as Derek and Jenn were. She definitely wasn't pleased, that's for sure.
This leaves us with three members left on Kinetic versus five on Arrow, so don't be surprised to see a shake-up on the next episode. While I'd love to see Heidi take another turn at project manager and save her reputation, the way the season is set up for this now means Angela really should be getting that position as she hasn't taken a turn yet and she should fight tooth and nail to get the job.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 11

The big question this week was, of course, would Surya's unsurpassed management brilliance bring him a third win as project manager?
While the women of Kinetic still like their former teammate, they'd much rather get the win themselves, and this time around it was Kristine's turn to step up, giving her more screen time in one episode than she's really had all season.
It didn't look good for her from the start. The task this week was to do a half-time promotion at a professional soccer match promoting GNC, a vitamin and nutritional supplement company. And as an aside, doesn't it make more sense that the rest of the world calls soccer "football", as there is a lot more connection between feet and the ball than there is in what we call football here? Anyway, the reason things didn't look good for Kristine is that she's done this sort of thing before, doing half-time promotions for an arena football team. Shouldn't that be a good thing? You'd think, but more often that not, when someone on The Apprentice says something is within their field of expertise, they find some way to horribly screw things up so I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen again.
Over on Arrow, driving in the vehicle after getting the assignment, Tim came up with the idea of a story based around a boxing match. Frank picked up on this and they started getting excited about the possibilities. Surya put a damper on their enthusiasm, saying it was a good idea but they should still try to think of others, resulting in rolled eyes and seething resentment.
Unfortunately for them, they didn't come up with anything better, so they went with the boxing.
Kristine's idea for the promotion was to have people dressed up as different vitamins run an obstacle course. I was thinking they should use their Olympic gold medalist somehow, but with a good enough show, they should be able to get by without doing this.
The biggest problem on Kinetic this week was Muna, who kept second-guessing Kristine and expressing concern over the plan, despite the project manager's experience doing these things. Nice try, executive producer Mark Burnett. Make us think that Kinetic might lose and Kristine would take Muna back into the boardroom with her. Classic misdirection.
Despite Muna's concerns, the Kinetic promotion went over smoothly. It was simple but fun, an easy message to get to the hundreds of soccer fans sitting in the stands. Yeah, people kept talking about the "15,000" fans at the game, but there didn't seem to be anywhere near that many watching this all happen. If there were 15,000 people in attendance, I'd hate to think what the lines at the bathrooms were like.
Arrow's show, however... Surya thought it went fantastically, but poor, poor man. It didn't. It was a confusing mess, and so his reign as project manager ended. Poor Surya.
When your goal is to win The Apprentice, you can't get a better reward than something that will let you get face time with the man who will make the final decision, and in this case Kinetic got to have a round of golf with The Donald, and some guy from some golf company who also provided the women each with a brand-new set of clubs. Sadly nobody made a fool of themselves desperately vying for Trump's attention.
I really would have liked it if someone had. As you might have noticed, this has been pretty short. It's not that this season is particularly bad, it's just not the best one we've seen.
The board room was fun. All of Arrow felt Surya should be fired, and he brought James in with him, someone he felt spent too much time covering his own ass, and Tim, who came up with the original boxing idea.
I'm not fond of seeing someone come up with an idea unless all other things are equal, and even then, it boils down to it being the project manager's approval that lets a bad idea go through, so Tim was safe. It came down to Surya's inability to lead this team against James' butt covering, and James did wait until it was way too late to voice his discomfort with the boxing idea. Yes, if you think something's a bad idea, cover your ass, but do so early enough in the process so that things can be changed if necessary. Better still, come up with a decent idea of your own. If nobody accepts it, fine, but at least you tried. That way you have something to really back yourself up with in the board room. With James, it just didn't look good the way he approached it.
There has been criticism that Surya was too repetitive with his points in the board room. He kept repeating his 5-2 record (which includes him as just a team member as well as a PM), but repeating points can often help. He fought hard, and managed to get Tim to admit to James having flaws and covering his ass, even though he still felt Surya should be fired.
But before we get to that, it's time for our weekly feature...
How Did The Winning Project Manager Compare to Heidi?
During the first two weeks of this process, Heidi set the bar for the winning PM and how they do sitting next to Trump in the losing team's board room, and nobody has come close. I'd like to say that Kristine succeeded, but she hardly said a thing. Granted, it would be hard to get a word in the way Surya and James were both defending themselves loudly and repeatedly. It took Trump asking her if she had anything to ask for her to say anything. She did ask a decent question, and she managed to look comfortable there (something not everyone was able to pull off). Heidi is still the champion though.
So Surya was fired, which was no surprise. He was holding his own and possibly even turning the tide in his favour, but then he made the mistake of going too far. He said that with this team in particular, he functions best when he isn't the leader. That so isn't want Trump wants to hear. If you ever, EVER want to be The Apprentice, do not admit to there being any conceivable situation where you couldn't be a leader!
Once the room cleared, The Donald did say he liked how hard Surya fought to stay, something James and Tim both agreed on as they stood watching Surya being driven away. Ah, some respect. Too little, too late, but it was respect. That's always nice to see.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired March 4

Did you know that Donald Trump has been appearing on WWE Raw? He's going to be at Wrestlemania with his chosen wrestler going up against Vince McMahon's chosen wrestler. The winner gets to shave the loser's head. Does anyone really think that Trump would allow his head to be shaven? It would be interesting to see.
More interesting than this episode was shaping up to be, but then things happened to make it one of the most unusual Apprentices yet.
After winning the task last week, Surya got to stay on as project manager of Arrow, demonstrating how that twist can completely skew everything this season. You can be sure his team isn't happy about this, but what can they do? Deliberately blow a task? Too risky. This is one twisted twist. Keep winning, the project manager gets most of the credit. Deliberately lose, you stand a good chance of going.
Of course, you could end up going just because you said the wrong thing. More on that soon.
Over on Kinetic, Jenn wanted to take her turn managing the team. After everything that happened last week, she wanted to step up to the challenge as most people do and should after they're brought into the boardroom after a loss and manage to survive.
Derek was please with Aimee being fired last time, and he felt that all they needed to do now is get rid of last of the "riff-raff" who just so happens to have been Jenn. With that done, then their team would truly excel.
The task this week was to create a special owner experience for the newest model Lexus. Simple enough, one would think.
Kinetic was struggling for ideas. They came up with the theme, "Come Experience Your Sixth Sense of Luxury," but nothing beyond that. Angela was put in charge of creativity though the whole team was brainstorming. Hey! I know! Instead of a "sixth sense of luxury", how about a "gold medal experience" and use your Olympic gold medallist to sell the idea of excellence? Instead, they come up with a magician (not bad, if done correctly (so of course it wasn't)), and go-karts. Yes, go-karts. Derek threw it out as an idea, as people do in brainstorming sessions, and Jenn jumped on it despite everyone else on the team - including Derek - hating it.
Here's the thing... You don't always need activities, especially when it's going to be nothing but adults there. I may be wrong, but I suspect they'd be able to go an afternoon without playing. Oh, I'm sure in most people's minds Lexus equals go-karts, but unless they're gold-plated and chauffeur-driven, they're not likely going to go over too well here.
As for Arrow, well, I don't know and I don't care what they were up to. Surya was driving them crazy, the rest were doing stuff, the two what's-their-faces were romancing, blah blah blah. They had a spiffy looking presentation with lots of luxury balloons and luxury foods in a luxurious setting, and other than a car battery dying from overuse, everything went rather well with nobody seemingly getting bored with no activities.
Andrea and Derek at Kinetic were having trouble with signage, Andrea particularly not being able to make up her mind and the deadline coming and going. This was a disaster in the making, so we have a very good idea of who is likely going to be going back in the board room (as soon as Jenn settled on go-karts, you know they were heading there). Fortunately for them, despite missing the deadline for guaranteed sign delivery, the signs did arrive in time, but they weren't of the standard they were hoping for.
Oh dear. Without fully luxurious signs, how were they going to spiff up their luxuriious crappy ass tents with the luxurious go-kart track outside? And don't even get me started on the luxurious magician! Hey, at least the luxurious magician didn't appear to work blue, making him a better choice than the comedian someone whose name I forget hired a season or two back (who was okay as a comedian, but she was entirely inappropriate for the audience).
Yes, it was all crappy ass luxury, compared to Arrow who had an event that lived up to what we'd expect to see, though why they didn't have pony rides and a petting zoo is beyond me. Anyway, chalk up another win for Surya, the project manager of the season!
It wasn't all bad for certain members of Kinetic. When talking to the Lexus executives, Trumpipoo asked if anyone on the team stood out, and they said that Heidi and Muna were both stars and their product knowledge was amazing. That was a sigh of relief, as they seemed so over the top in their acquiring of that knowledge that for a moment it seemed like they may have been the ones destined for the board room. I guess when it comes to product knowledge, if you're hoping to sell the product, there is no such thing as too much.
Despite the glowing words from the executives, Donaldkins asked Heidi what had happened to her, going from a superstar to being on a team that's losing too often. This lead to more glowing words from her teammates who made it very clear that Heidi was in no way responsible for the loss and that in her assigned area, she excelled.
She really needs another shot at project manager, but there are people on her team who haven't had a chance yet, so it's not likely going to happen yet.
Seeing that we're already on the subject of Heidi, let's do our weekly comparison of the winning PM's boardroom ability to that standard set by Heidi the first two weeks.
Honestly, I wasn't even sure Surya was there at first until we got a good camera angle. Trump even got to the point where he asked him if he was going to say anything at all, prompting Surya to spout out a question. Interestingly, the previous Apprentice winner who was Donald's eyes and ears this week was old Squidward himself, Randall (or is it Randal? I don't care, because he was the one who didn't want to share the spotlight with Rebecca a couple of seasons back, the last time there were two clear choices for the title) spoke a little too much, and Trump asked him to be quiet at one point so he could say something. Ha! You should have said yes to Rebecca!
I like the idea of the winning PM being in the boardroom, but I'm wishing there was more turnover in the position now so we could see how more people handle it.
Talking to the losing team, The Donald was asking Derek a question, I can't remember what, when Derek referred to himself as "white trash". Trump did not like this, and he doesn't want anyone working for him who refers to themselves like that, even if they're joking, so he fired Derek right there.
Dang. And there was still a good 10 minutes left, which means it was likely someone else was going to go. We've seen double and even quadruple firings before, but it's always at the same time. It's never like that. Derek took it good naturedly, hey, it's only The Apprentice and it's not like any of these people are hurting for money going in as they tend to be fairly successful before being selected.
You know what? That would be an awesome season of The Apprentice. Instead of taking people who are already successful, take a group of intelligent hard workers who, for whatever reason, haven't been particularly successful. People who would be very hungry for this opportunity. Now that would be a season worth watching. Granted, the job at the end couldn't have as much responsibility, but give them something that would be better than anything they've done before and would give them the chance to learn skills that would vastly improve their employability.
Anyway, once Derek was gone, there was some apprehension in the room. What just happened? Is this over? Can we go now? Well, it wasn't over yet. Trumpster had more to say and more to ask. When he wondered who Jenn was going to going to bring with her, she wanted Andrea and, unfortunately, Derek. They were the creative staff and she saw it as their fault that they lost. She may have succeeded in saving her butt if she hadn't been so insistant on the go-karts. How can she ever enjoy them again, knowing they cost her this "job interview"?
Yeah, Jenn was fired. One thing the rest of her team wanted Trump and her to know was that they respect her, they just think she didn't do a good job on this task. After she was fired, Muna made sure she knows they respect her. It was okay though, Jenn took the firing very well. It's nice to see people realize they're only on a competitive reality show competing for a chance to work for Donald Trump. Unlike Aimee's ouster last week, this one ended with smiles and hugs and good wishes.
Wait a minute! No, that's not nice! Damn it, this is The Apprentice!
Next week we'd better see some anger and bile again.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired February 18

Surya was angry after last week's boardroom. Oh, he was PISSED! So full of righteous fury was he that it was all I could do to not shout "SHUT THE HELL UP!" at my television. He was just that mad.
Um, get over it? He has family, a job, and a reputation to go back to after this is all over. I usually recommend that people watch the show they're going to compete on to get an idea on how to succeed in the competition. This time, I would have recommended that Surya watch the show before going on to see what show he was going on. Besides, by the time this is all over for him it's highly likely there will be much more happening to hurt his reputation than one boardroom, and in order to hasten that along he demanded to be the next project manager. Okay, Mr. Raging Hair, let's see how you do.
Huh. All this time doing this blog, and I just noticed I can do this or this or even this. I promise I won't (usually), but damn, how could I have missed that? There is one button for Edit Html, and one for Compose. I've always just stayed on the default Edit Html side because it does everything I want it to. Yes, I'm digressing. What do you want me to do, talk about Aimee? Fine.
Aimee was feeling pretty good about herself after last week's victory, and she was pretty sure she's the pinnacle of management excellence. She is a glorious Golden Goddess and her minions flock to her light where she leads them to decisive, historic victories that will be sung of by bards for millennia to come. Her team, however, felt a little different and they pretty much won the last task in spite of her. Well, with the new rule for winning project managers she now has a second chance to prove to them just how fantastic she really is.
This week's task is pretty simple. Each team was to go to a different shopping mall in Las Angeles and get people to enter a Priceline.com sweepstakes. The team with the most people signed up wins. Set up an attractive booth and get out there and sell, sell, sell. How much easier can it get?
Kinetic already has an ace up their sleeve. Come meet an Olympic Gold Medalist and enter a free sweepstakes! HOW DID THEY NOT USE ANGELA FOR THIS?!?!? Are they under some sort of injunction that prohibits them from using her as a spokesperson for anything other than honey? I liked the tropical themed booth they had set up, even though Aimee really didn't like an inflatable pink octopus. She reeeeeeeaaaaalllllyyyy didn't like it. She didn't like it so much that I have a feeling she was letting out all her sublimated hostility over never being able to make a decision at it. Well, at least she knows how to delegate poorly without putting enough thought into it. That's a skill that will do well for her in life.
Derek and Jenn were walking through the location with a mall representative and Derek asked what the ethnic makeup of the mall customers was, and she told him it was 50% Hispanic and 50% trailer park trash. Ha! Noooo, she didn't call the honkies that! I did wonder why the heck Derek would ask that, but as it turned out, it was a good question. I live in a fairly linguistically homogenous city in a fairly linguistically province in Canada. We do have some French enclaves around Alberta, but for the most part you'd have to head much further east for language to be an issue.
Aimee is from Chicago, so I'm actually on her side that it may not have occurred to her that many of the mall customers might have a problem with English. Derek not only asked the question of the mall representative, he's also from L.A. and he speaks Spanish. That they didn't have translators there and all their signs, ads, and computer sign-up bilingual falls largely on his shoulders.
"Watch the damned show" comes into play here as well. One thing that usually works out very well on The Apprentice is doing casual focus groups. Go talk to your potential customers. If someone bothered going through the mall talking to customers to find out what would attract them to the sweepstakes, the language issue would have come up a lot sooner. This also gave us something for future Apprentices to learn from when they watch this damned season. If you're going to be competing in a location you're not familiar with, and you know where it's going to be, study up on it. Learn everything you think you may need to know for what may come up.
Over on the Arrow side, Surya continued to make himself into someone it will be very pleasant to see fired. The task is getting people to sign up for a sweepstakes. That's it. Yes, it's more than just setting up a table and waiting for people to come to you, but it's not that much more. The way he was approaching it though, you'd swear he was getting ready for a hostile takeover of the Coca-Cola company. He really doesn't fit in with his team. It's like putting Sean Penn in with the Three Stooges. Not that Sean Penn is dour and humourless! Oh, wait. Yes, because Sean Penn is dour and humourless. (I'm thinking back to a recent dour and humourless Academy Awards appearance he made, when he didn't much like the host's joke at the expense of a fellow dour and humourless actor.) Arrow may be a little too goofy at times, but at least they work well with people on their own wavelength.
"Frankie Suits" annoys the hell out of me, but he can sell up a storm unlike Surya who appeared to have no luck with his little walk around the mall. That was bad, but even worse is that his team had no idea where he went. Really, if you're going to disappear, tell someone. Especially if you're the project manager, and even if your team does better without you.
So much better, Arrow won. The lack of understanding of the mall's clientele likely killed Kinetic in this task. Having everything bilingual and hiring an interpreter or two could have made all the difference in the world.
The reward Arrow got for winning this task, other than getting to move back out of the tents, was a surfing lesson from a couple of champion surfers followed by supper at a fancy restaurant. It all seemed fun until the waves got bigger and bigger. It really didn't seem safe for a beginner out there. Someone might get... Ouch! Nicole got hurt! It was bad enough that she had to go to the doctor, and Tim volunteered to go with her. This romance is really heating up! But first, what about her injury? Will she have to play the rest of this season on crutches? It wouldn't be the first time a reward caused that to happen, and what was the result? Possibly the best second place finisher ever, Rebecca (I say not having seen season 1 and having heard good things about Kwame but not seeing him in action hurts him in the ratings). Too bad Rebecca wasn't in this season or the last. She'd be owning the competition. Anyway, nothing was sprained or broken. It was a jellyfish sting. Well gee, if they knew that earlier, Tim could have peed on her foot for nothing!
I don't know if the doctor gave her something for it, but back at the mansion she was able to jump into the pool easily enough. Then she and Tim kissed. Awwwww! The big romance that's been blossoming all season is finally blooming! And I still don't care about either of these two, even though Tim does play a wicked piano.
Going into the boardroom, Aimee planned on calling on Derek for not telling her about the ethnic makeup of the mall, and sure enough she did. It was so obvious that Trump should fire either him or Jenn for not telling her about the 50% of Hispanics! Imagine her surprise when pretty much the whole team called her lack of management style into question. She really was surprised. She's the Golden Goddess of Management! If looks could smite...
Things didn't get any better for her when her team kept telling The Donald that she is no Heidi. They praised Heidi's leadership more in this boardroom than they did at all while she was project manager. The best part of this is that it gives me a great excuse to go into my weekly Heidi segue and boardroom style comparison.
Surya did a far better job sitting at Trump's side than Aaron or Aimee did, but he didn't quite match Heidi's poise, confidence, or ability to say the right things. On the plus side, he didn't fall as far from all that as the other two did. He was competent, which is something he hasn't been showing much of lately.
Something else occurred to me about Heidi this week. I really like the way she's playing this. Yes, she did very well as a winning PM in the boardroom, and while she didn't blow me away as PM, she was a solid performer in that position. If you notice, we haven't really seen or heard much from her since then. Believe it or not, I actually think that's a good thing.
It means she isn't out there actively putting down the other PMs on her team, and each task she's in there working hard for them. One of the biggest mistakes we see every season on The Apprentice is that too many people want to be the leader and get all bristly when someone else is PM. Yes, Trump is looking for a good leader. But he's also looking for someone who can be lead and is a smart, capable team player. I would like to see her step up a little more if a PM is failing, but she's not creating pointless friction and that's a good thing.
This is a show that makes it pretty impossible to fly under the radar. If you're not pulling your weight in a team, it will be noticed. If you're not willing to be a project manager, it will be noticed. You can't win this show if you've never been a PM. So just because we're not seeing a lot of someone, it doesn't mean they're playing to fly under the radar. It means they're not PM, not creating drama, and not a disaster.
I can see one thing about Heidi that will probably turn a lot of people off her. At times she does have a bit of an air of smugness about her. When she was being praised by her team, she couldn't keep that smile off her face, despite at times looking like she was trying to hide it. The smugness came through, but I also saw a little embarrassment and some genuine happiness at the kind words. Who wouldn't be affected by that show of support?
I wasn't sure at first, but I'm making it official. Realivision is now cheering on Heidi to win.
Back to the boardroom, Aimee chose to bring back Derek and Jenn with her, which was no big surprise. They were the two who knew about the ethnic makeup of the customers, and neither of them bothered to mention it to her, and this was the big focus of the night. They didn't tell her, but she didn't ask. She also didn't think about it herself by taking time to actually look around the mall. I agree she should have done that, but out of fairness, I don't think the language thing would have occurred to me either. I don't see that as a bad thing. "Look at all these Hispanic-looking people. Oh dear, they must all speak only Spanish!" No, I can't hold that against her. Losing this task fell more on Derek and Jenn's shoulders if it was all about the language barrier.
The thing is, it wasn't all about the language barrier. Aimee was just an awful leader. Maybe in a real life situation she's a lot better, but not here. Maybe it's the fear of looking bad on television or not wanting to give her teammates cause to want her gone that caused her to be that bad, but if so, in the end it cost her everything. Well, not everything, but this competition anyway.
That said, she really did seem to have an overinflated opinion of her abilities. She was pissed when she was fired! Getting into the car after leaving the boardroom, she looked at Derek and Jenn and said something angry. I can't read lips, especially from the side, and there was no sound, but yes, it was definitely not "Goodbye and good luck!"
Her bitterness shone through in her final words, and bitterness is usually the name of the game there. Perhaps she should have had an Apprentice Night with Surya before they started the competition to see just what show it is they were going to be on. Do people sign up for Survivor then act surprised that they're going to be stranded on an island? Boardrooms are going to be cutthroat, and your flaws are going to be exposed. Sorry. You should have known that going in.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired February 11

Thanks to the Super Bowl, we didn't get an episode of The Apprentice last week, damn their football playing, tight pants wearing hides! My disinterest in sports runs quite high, so in addition to being peeved at a week without this show or a new episode of Grease, something came up in this episode that I'm quite embarassed at missing, but more on that later.
I should also mention that in my last commentary, I commented on Kinetic having one man and Arrow having one woman left. I was mistaken. Arrow has Nicole and Stefani, two women. My mistake.
Arrow was feeling pretty darned good about themselves after their El Pollo Loco win. If you're going to win anything, win the El Pollo Loco task.
"Wow, you sucked on the show!"
"I KICKED ASS WITH EL POLLO LOCO, BUB!"
See? It's much better than winning a task that's all about honey and bees. Maybe.
"The bees... Oh god, the bees..."
Okay, that might not be a bad one to lose. You can use the bee terror as an excuse.
I can understand wanting teams to get an understanding of different parts of a business, but is it really necessary to send them out to personally harvest honey? Yeah, it was cool that they did it, but what if it turned out any of them were allergic to bee stings? Well, if it was Frank it would be funny, but not so much with anyone else. Franky Pants would instead be Franky Swollen Face Can't Breathe. Heh. Ha. Ha ha. Haahahhahh.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
No, seriously, he doesn't annoy me that much.
Arrow, despite Surya's rambling, got off to a good start and seemed to be getting things done in the office while the others were off fighting the insect menace. Not so much with Kinetic, where the bumble warriors came back after four hours to find that new project manager Aimee came up with two possible names for their honey, and got absolutely nothing else done in all that time. What the hell? Throughout this task, Aimee proved herself completely useless as a project manager. If Kinetic were to win, it would be despite her, not because of her.
This was a tough episode to call. Aimee was so useless there was no way she was going to win. What was with the shopping spree?
Not that Aaron was doing much better. No matter what Surya was doing, things did seem to be going well until it came time to start selling sweet, delicious honey. His team was doing well in sales, but the stubby man himself was... there. Those of you who have been reading this blog for a while now know there is one piece of advice I'd give to any contestant on a series that's lasted a season or more. Watch the damned show! There are certain things you must always do if you're the project manager. Delegate responsibly and intelligently and work your little butt off! Once the sales part of the task is under way, unless there are little fires you have to put out, get out there and sell.
The biggest fear on the show is getting fired, but if you try to play it too safe, you're not going to win anyway. On Survivor and Big Brother, I will argue tirelessly that flying under the radar is a valid strategy. A lot of people disagree, but not everyone can dominate those challenges. This isn't one of those shows. You need to stand out as someone competent and hard working who can take smart risks.
Back at Kinetic, the team was noticing that something needed to be done if they were going to win (unfortunately Heidi wasn't one of them, or at least we didn't see her really saying anything). Derek and Angela rose to the challenge, that's for sure. Derek put on a beekeeper outfit, which looked silly, yes, but it got attention. He also seems very personable, and that certainly helps.
Angela. Oh, Angela. Remember back at the beginning when I said I'm quite embarrassed about missing something? Kinetic has a friggin' Olympic gold medalist on their team! How have they not used this resource before? Well, not that I thought of her myself. Only Canadian gold medalists matter to me, eh! And she hasn't been getting much screen time, so it was easy to forget she's even there.
If Heidi had utilized Angela properly, Kinetic may well have won the El Pollo Loco challenge. Contact some radio stations, get the word out that an Olympic gold medalist is at the restaurant for a limited time. But they didn't, and now Aimee is the PM. But someone on the team realized that Angela is a definite asset and they quickly set up a table for her with some hand-made signage.
They were helped by another blunder on the Arrow side. With the chicken challenge, their win was aided tremendously by nice big bulk sale of chicken bowls. Hey, it worked once, why not try it again? A good reason not to try it again is because it's a different product and they were trying to get a different client. It's one thing to sell people lunch, something they can buy individually. It's another trying to sell honey in bulk to stores that can't just make purchases like that as a snap decision.
Tim and Nicole spent a lot of time driving around pointlessly, time they could have spent selling at the supermarket. The lesson there is that you have to tailor your strategy to the task. Yes, learn from what came previously (Watch the damned show!) because often tasks are pretty similar, but don't just repeat something and hope it works. At least they got some alone time together. Alone with the cameras, but about as alone as it gets when you're on a competitive reality show.
So despite Aimee's incompetence, Kinetic won. It would be pretty horrifying if they keep winning in spite of her. Imagine if they keep winning, and she stays PM. Yikes. Well, we'll see what happens next week. If Kinetic is smart, they'll use their Olympic gold medalist as an attraction when the tasks warrant it.
The boardroom wasn't the most exciting we've ever seen. The blossoming romance between Tim and Nicole came up, and Aaron brought Nicole back with him even though nobody thought she deserved to be fired. It really came down to Aaron vs. Surya. Surya wasn't a lot of help on this task, but the blame for the loss really sits on Aaron's shoulders and when he was fired, the right decision was made.
I know I keep singing the praises of Heidi in the boardroom at Trump's side, but as we see other people in that chair, it keeps getting more obvious how good she was. Last time Aaron was far too quiet, an issue that came up this week more than once. Now it was Aimee, who went too far in the other direction and she was so aggressive it was getting a little on The Donald's nerves. Sure, she was trying to save Surya, something that was pretty obvious, but in the end it's either him or her so she could have toned it down a little.
All in all, it was an okay episode. It could have used more bees though.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired Jan. 28 - Commentary

I'm thinking I should change the name of this blog to "Bravadovision." It's hip, it's happenin', and I should use two people in chicken costumes standing at the Information Superintersection to promote it!
We're back to being able to tell who loses by the editing, but that's okay, it's worth it to here someone keep pressing for chicken suits and Bravado. The Bravado Chicken Bowl, now at an El Pollo Loco near you! Not near me though. I live in stinky ol' Canada and we don't get fine dining like that here. What gastronomic delights are we missing out on without our very own El Pollo Loco franchises nearby? Poop. Oh well, at least we still have poutine.
The break Kinetic enjoyed last week was over, so we were back to both teams competing this week. Unfortunately for Arrow, they lost three people in a row so The Donald decided to even things up a smidge by asking someone in Kinetic to volunteer to switch sides.
Last week when only Aaron stepped forward to be a project manager, I was flabbergasted that nobody else was willing to take the opportunity. You can't win The Apprentice if you're not willing to be PM. This week was different though. This was asking someone to move to a losing team, away from the people they've been building a relationship. In the end, three people volunteered, and of those three Arrow picked Surya. This now leaves one man with Kinetic, and one woman with Arrow. Even when the producers aren't arbitrarily making it men vs. women, the candidates manage quite well to do it themselves.
I'm really liking the name "Bravadovision"! Don't shut me out! And chickens! We need two giant chickens!
Poor Marisa. It was so amazingly obvious she was going to be going to the boardroom. Was she going to be the one to cause Trump to have the meltdown we were promised in the promos? Well, not really. He got a little gruff, but damn, those promos were misleading. "And be there for the start of an Apprentice romance!" I was, and where were the two people snogging we were promised? Nobody kissed! All we learned is that Tim can play the piano and Nicole kind of likes him. This is a love story for the ages.
By the way, speaking of the piano, how amazingly awesome was that reward? A private show with Andrea Bocelli on the beach, and a sky full of fireworks over the water. That was a damned fine prize.
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Back to the tasks, where Marisa really felt "Bravado Chicken Bowl" was the way to go, and they really needed two people in chicken costumes at the intersections. I agree! I'm also sure Marisa agrees that we should rename this blog "Bravadovision" and have two chicken mascots!
At least chicken costumes are better than balloons and banners! Or not. Kinetic had next to no marketing, and as a result they lost their first task of the season.
One of the best moments of the episode was when Trump told Arrow that Surya must be a good luck charm for them. You could see faces drop right down to the ground, like Surya was going to get all the credit for the win. Ah, it was great.
Since the premiere, I've been singing the praises of Heidi in the boardroom when she was sitting beside Trump. She was confident, articulate, and spoke up appropriately without trying to interject too much. Now we finally got someone to compare her against, and Aaron was sitting back, quiet, and to me looked a little nervous. Even The Donald asked him if he was going to say anything. Ouch. Don't be surprised if these things play into the final decision.
And speaking of final decisions, what about those chicken suits? I think they're a great idea, as great as "Bravadovision"! I know the decision on the name has been made, but I just want you to think about it, okay?
Marisa never stood a chance. If she had just let the whole "Bravado" and chicken suit thing go, maybe the rest of the team wouldn't have pushed so hard to get rid of her. Marketing was lacking though, and that's really what killed the team in this task. Heidi brought Aimee back with them, but unless she said something really stupid, there was no way Aimee was going. She didn't lose this task for them. It was down to Heidi and Marisa, and Heidi has two wins under her belt as PM.
Not that I was 100% positive about the result. Every time Marisa interrupted or brought up the chicken suits, Heidi started to laugh a little, causing her to make amused little faces. Catch Trump in the wrong mood in the boardroom, and that alone could have got Heidi fired. You really want to be careful about that sort of thing. Marisa was also fighting quite spiritedly, and not quite as desperately as Frank was in the premiere. All it takes is that one little slip, and the person who was about to be fired is saved for yet another week. I like you, Heidi. Please be careful with that stuff.
In the car after she was fired, Marisa was still talking about chicken suits, but she mentioned that El Pollo Loco's mascot is a chicken. If that's true, and they have an official mascot chicken costume, she should have talked it out and made the point that was instead of keep bringing up wanting to do chicken costumes because, you know, they're selling chicken.
I still like "Bravadovision". Sleep on it, we can discuss it more in the morning.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired Jan. 21 - Commentary

Don't worry. We will talk about that ending. For my money, it was one of the best endings of any Apprentice ever. It didn't come close to the greatest of all where four people were fired, but it certain outshines the majority.
As a result of winning last week's challenge, Heidi and the rest of Kinetic Corporation got to rest and relax at a luxury hotel, the name of which I'm not going to give because I've been burned before. Free product placements galore in my lengthy Treasure Hunters recaps, but did I get any swag? No! That, and I can't remember the name of it. It certainly did look luxurious though. Throughout the episode they kept cutting to the team relaxing with refreshing drinks, getting massages, and lounging by the pool.
Bastards. Rubbing it in my poverty-stricken face. Just for that, I'm not going to talk about the luxury day for the rest of this commentary.
Instead, let's get right to those daring go-getters at Arrow Corp! Because they were the only team competing, they had to split into two sub-teams. Trump asked who would like to be the captains, and Aaron jumped in without giving a second thought! And the other captain?
Being project manager can be a scary thing. A losing PM is the most likely to be fired unless an underling screws up significantly, and nobody wants to be fired. However, you can't win at the end unless you've actually stepped up to be PM a few times. That's why I was shocked that, after Aaron, nobody wanted to volunteer. So the Donald had to offer it to someone, and he asked Michelle. In the hot seat, she had no choice but to say yes, not that she had any choice anyway! After last week, she should have been looking to prove herself, so she should have been itching to be PM this week.
Unfortunately for her, it looked like the last boardroom really shook her. Most people don't want to hear that others don't like them, and think they're a drain on the team. But instead of using this to give herself strength, I don't think I've seen a PM this wishy washy in a long time. "So what do you think of this idea? I won't go ahead with this unless everyones behind it one hundred percent! I feel I need to go to the bathroom, but I want your input on that." It was horrifying cross between wanting to have her teammates like her and wanting to cover her ass in case they lost. Sad, so very sad. Michelle, you looked just like My Name is Earl's Jaime Pressly, but now you look like her empty, lifeless doppelganger. If only there was a way you could get our respect back, even just a little.
One of the things you can count on with The Apprentice is that the team that gets the most airtime is inevitably the one that loses. So trust those scamps to throw us for a loop by giving both teams pretty much equal time! Both had their bumps, and even though it looked like Michelle's team was doing worse, you never can tell when it's all based on customer satisfaction. Maybe they lucked into a tour group who was enjoying the experience and gave them high points!
An argument I often make on The Apprentice, Survivor, and Big Brother (it's not as important on The Amazing Race, but it still helps) is WATCH THE DAMNED SHOW! When several seasons have come and gone, there is no excuse for not having done some homework and seeing what has worked in the past and what has failed miserably. What's worked before? Getting out there and asking the customers themselves what they want (point in favour: Aaron's team). What has failed miserably? Wandering aimlessly with no plan at all (point against: Michelle's team). You can't fault Michelle for a malfunctioning microphone, but you can SQUEEEEEEE blame her for SQUEEEEEE having no SQUEEEEE plan and having the whole SQUEEEEE tour look like she was SQUEEEEEE winging it.
Aaron's team definitely earned their win this week. Michelle earned a lot of my respect back in the boardroom.
In the history of The Apprentice, only one other person has ever quit. But Michelle was the first who was a project manager and the first to do it in the boardroom.
Trump did not like this one bit, and he let her know it again and again. He did his best to belittle her choice and call her a quitter, but I thought she made a great choice.
Does Donald Trump have more money under the cushions in his sofa than I will ever have my whole life? Yes. But that doesn't mean he can't be full of crap. Very often in life, resigning is the best option, and more often than not it's a better option than being fired. Seriously, who are you going to hire, someone who resigned from their last job or someone who was given the sack?
If Michelle went back into the boardroom with the rest of her team, they were going to spend the whole time tearing her apart. There was also no chance that she wasn't going to be the one fired. Why spend needless time being attacked by people who already didn't like you anyway? And even if she pulled out a miracle and made it through, they were going to keep bringing her back again and again until the axe is finally lowered.
I don't know how much was editing, but she also looked like she was pretty much ostracized in camp. In cold, wet, miserable camp. Even if she wasn't ostracized completely, it was very clear that the others didn't like her. So why put herself through that?
She made the right choice, and I applaud her for it. And if it meant another teammate would be fired, all the more power to her! Watching their reactions to this possibility was priceless. The fear and hypocrisy made for a frothy brew indeed. How dare she don't allow them to attack her and ensure her ouster, and now in her place one of them might go instead? The injustice! Can't she think of them instead of doing what's best for her?
Hee hee! But sadly it wasn't to be. Trump decided that nobody was going to be fired that night.
Whatever else happens in your life, Michelle, despite going out early, you went out memorably and with your head held high.
Good for you. Seriously.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired Jan. 14 - Commentary

So I'm thinking these dainty little flowers should get over being forced to live in tents and be grateful for the fact that they're in Los Angeles. If there's an earthquake, having collapse on you won't be nearly as painful as having an entire mansion fall down on your head.
But before I go on any further, there is a question that's nagging me. If I were to base everything I know on reality television, I would be under the impression that all gay African-American men shave their heads. First there was the original, the most memorable, and friend to Realivision - Marcellas Reynolds from Big Brother 3. Following him on Big Brother 6 was Marcellas wannabe, Beau Beasley. Now we have Carey on The Apprentice. All I'm asking for is a little hair.
Okay, is that everything off my chest? Good.
This was a fine episode. It certainly gave us some fine lines and some very memorable images. Like Carey squeezing into swimwear he obviously sized for a child. Damn, that suite was small and tight! What was even better about it is that it gave Trump a chance to brag about his own body (I swoon just thinking about it, including the potential for combed-over back hair).
The thing is, if Carey's team reigned him in and they designed better suits for men, they would have won that challenge. Arrow Corporation certain had the better women's line, and they had a lot more in the way of patterned material and colour. If you look at the amount Kinetic won by (I believe it was only by about $1000, give or take), a better mens line would have had Arrow winning handily. Considering that their mens line only got just over $300 in orders, their women's suits must have slaughtered Kinetic's by a landslide.
Now note that I'm using the names "Arrow" and "Kinetic". We've been denied the classic "name your corporation" scenes and seeing them explain the names to The Donald! I know they're trying to shake things up a little this season, but some things need to stay the same.
Even worse than this, not only are they shaking things up from previous seasons, they're doing it from previous episodes this season! The snooty European butler from the premiere is gone, only to be replaced by some blonde executive assistant and possible Trump's fourth wife once Melania starts showing a line or two in her face.
To help you out with the corporations, Arrow is the team that keeps losing, Kinetic keeps winning. Thanks to this latest win, Kinetic doesn't have to compete in the next challenge. That means we won't see them possibly lose until the week after next. That's actually a bit of a shame, because the losing team always gets the most screen time in an episode, and that gives you more of a look into how the team works and who is really deserving to stay or go. I'm liking Heidi so far, but we really haven't seen much of her and her team so that like could well go away by the next episode. At least she's still doing well in the boardroom. Some people don't like the way she's handling herself there, but oh well. She's asking the right questions, making the right statements, not overplaying or underplaying her role, and sucking up just enough to the boss that it makes him happy without making her look like a toady in his eyes.
It looks like there is some discontent stirring in Kinetic Corporation though. We've already heard from one member who isn't happy that Heidi's been project manager two tasks in a row. Aaaaah, this is what I've been waiting for with this particular twist! What do you do? If you keep winning, she stays as project manager and the further that goes on, the harder she will be to beat at the end. But if you deliberately lose, that means you have to throw a task, and if you do that, fingers will be pointing at you in the boardroom and your butt may just be on its way out the door. What do you do? I really hope someone is stupid enough to try and throw the task, or is smart enough to throw it without looking like they did. Either way would be fun to watch.
Finally, should Carey have been fired? No. Nicole should be gone. She was the project manager, and even if Carey was forcing his ideas on everyone, as the leader she should have been able to say no to the itsy bitsy teeny weeny pink paisley banana hammock. This wasn't one of those tasks that required different team members to be doing different things. All they had to do was design swimwear, so she can't reasonably make the argument that this function was assigned to Carey and he screwed it up. She let him take over the design and she should have signed off on the final product. Michelle (you know, the one who looks like My Name Is Earl's Jaime Pressly) shouldn't have really been there either, but what are you going to do? The PM is allowed to take two people in with them, and Michelle rubbed enough people the wrong way that she was the best chance for Carey and Nicole to make it safely through the boardroom.
I don't know if Heidi honestly thought that Michelle shouldn't have been there, or if she saw that the argument to fire her was just weak enough to give her room to talk Trump into keeping Michelle around and did so in hopes that Michelle returning will keep Arrow's morale down and losing streak continuing. Either way, good job keeping the focus on Nicole and Carey, Heidi.
After the losers were sent back to their tents, I got to see my favourite visual so far, and if you weren't looking, it was brief enough that it would have been very easy to miss. Nicole and Michelle were wheeling their luggage back to the tents when we saw Nicole just running with hers. I hope we see more of that next week, and I'd love to see the reason why, even if it's just something so boring as "I was cold."


A note concerning something new to Realivision: This is my first post using the new version of Blogger, and as you can see below this there are labels. It's pointless clicking on them now because this is the first post that has labels. I've no idea how I'm going to incorporate them yet, so for now I'm going to keep them pretty simple. As the number of posts that have them grows, I may expand the labels used, and if I find the time, I may even go back and edit older posts so they'll have labels too.

The Apprentice L.A. - Aired Jan. 7 - Commentary

We're back, baby! I hope you all had a great holiday season, spending quality time with friends and family... Oh, screw it. Competitive reality shows with The Apprentice and Grease: You're The One That I Want have returned! We'll get to Grease in a post later today or tomorrow, even though it aired first. I want to start the New Year off with the bigger show. The 'UGE show! The 30 billion dollar industry!
Now there's no question about it, Donald Trump is an asshole. He's demonstrated this in the past, and the whole feud with Rosie O'Donnell is beyond ridiculous, though there's no doubt he's milking the whole thing for publicity. Despite all of this though, he's a highly entertaining host for a show such as The Apprentice. His bombastic, over-the-top style is exactly what this ode to greed requires. And then there is the gorgeous, gorgeous hair... It's 'UGE!
This season finds us in beautiful Los Angeles, California. It's not quite as beautiful as New York, nor as full of life and character (as a city, as they both certainly have their fair share of characters). And it's too damned sunny. Seriously, I heart NY as a location much more than LA. Besides, both the Crips and the Bloods are out to get me.
That said, it certainly doesn't hurt to mix things up and have a change of location, as long as your not Laverne and Shirley. The candidates got to work a car wash last night, so already the show is making use of it's new backdrop. The living and work arrangements are interesting too, with Trump and the boardroom being right next to the mansion and campground. Oh, the campground. I'm loving that! These contestants may be successful in business, but judging from life around tents, they'd probably die if they ever had to do Survivor. They got tents, latrines, showers, a barbeque... Everything they could possibly need! Look at it as an adventure, oh frail little city folk.
The only real problem with the new setup is the loss of one of the classic Apprentice scenes. There's no hallway for the surviving losers to walk down, no door into the suite opening onto looks of shock or cries of happiness. On the other hand, instead of a receptionist letting the candidates into the boardroom, we now have a butler. How posh is that? Yay, Jeeves!
The other big changes this season are on either side of Trump, and I'm not talking about his Real Doll wife (that link is not safe for work, around children, behind Grandma's back, or anywhere for that matter, so be warned (here, this one is much safer)). No, I'm talking about his daughter, Ivanka Trump, replacing the fired and much missed Carolyn. Luckily however, she's been doing a fine job so far and I can't wait to see further along in the season. On the other side, everyone's favourite curmudgeon, George, is gone! Maybe he's eating some fine cookies somewhere, maybe he's off playing shuffleboard, or maybe he's just too cranky to do it this season. All we know is that his chair is empty, and the latest twist is that the winning project manager will sit there when the losing team is in the boardroom. Oooooh, I like!
Being project manager during a task has always been a dangerous spot, with few benefits other than picking who comes back into the boardroom with you if you lose, and something to point to at the end if you make it to the final two. But now there are definite perks. In addition to the above sitting in on the losing team, the winning project manager now keeps that position until their team loses. If you get a team on a hot winning streak, you could write yourself into the final two unless you do something truly awful to screw yourself royally. Who wants to sit beside someone at the end who can say, "Mr. Trump, look at my record. I was project manager SIX weeks running!" Nobody, that's who!
Because it was the season premiere, we didn't get to know a lot of the cast. Trump really seemed to like that rat who helped screw Team Canada out of the very first Olympic gold medal for women's hockey ever, but that was pretty much all we saw of that triumph-stealing hussy. No, at the start of the season for most of these shows you pretty much only get camera time if you're in a position of power, if you're likely to make an early exit, or if you stand out in what is usually a bad way. James got some face time because he seems to be very, very talkative, but in the end this episode was the Martin, Frank, and Heidi Show. Martin was going to get face time no matter what, and I've got a feeling that Frank would have too, even if he wasn't his team's project manager. I'm just grateful he was, because it gave us one of the best near meltdowns ever following one of the best starts by an insane project manager ever. It was all good!
I won't even bother saying anything about Heidi's team this time around. They were cool, collected, and they won by thinking things through. Not so much with Frank, who didn't so much lead his team but started panicking immediately, which lead to the wonderful shot of him running away to get fliers printed while leaving his team wondering what the hell just happened. It was sooo delicious to see!
Then there was Martin. From the moment he stood there in his suit he bought from a blind tailor offering Trump a hug if it meant he could go to the bathroom we knew he was going to be a disaster, but how big of one? I mean, he's got the mighty big shoes of Brent from season 5, Markus from season 4, and Danny from season 3 to fill!
On the first task, putting together a tent, he excelled at standing on a rock, claiming he was "supervising". So far, so good! Then at the car wash he was a washout at sales. But... He just wasn't good at it. He didn't actually drive any sales away. That was a little disappointing. And for the record, I don't think Brent was ever Apprentice material, but I still think he was unfairly treated by his team based on his looks and personality.
Anyway, Frank's team lost, and Martin stayed surprisingly cool while Frank got more and more freaked out with every passing moment. I kept waiting for him to break down in uncontrollable sobs or to snap and start swearing at people while getting all paranoid. As fun as either of those would have been, the barely contained desperation was a blast to see. It also helped us to learn that in the boardroom, whining and begging means you "have the fire to succeed". In fact, maybe if Martin didn't stay so cool and did a little whining and begging himself, things would have been different. As it was, he was the one who took a ride home in a luxury car (no New York taxis this season).
I haven't said much about Heidi yet. Well, she was a competent project manager. It was a fairly straightforward task, so we'll have to wait to see how she does on something a little trickier. However, where she really shined was sitting beside The Donald in the boardroom. She had gone in with a plan to try and keep the weakest player on the other team around, but obviously she didn't have any control over that. What she did do well was sit there with confidence, asked good questions, and was honest with Trump. She looked like she belonged there, and that certainly can't hurt. If she wins again next week, she can build on all of that and help lay the foundation for keeping herself safe after her teams inevitable first loss (I say thinking of the odds of winning several in a row, but you never really know).
It's too early in the game to pick a favourite. There are just too many people we don't know well enough yet to make that call. For the moment though, Heidi is sitting in that coveted spot.