Survivor: Fiji - Aired February 8

For the first two seasons of Survivor, I missed the first several episodes. Season one was a cultural phenomenon, but it didn't sound interesting enough at first to get me watching. One day there was nothing else to do and everyone was talking about the show. I was hooked right through to swearing loudly several times after Richard Hatch won. For the record, in hindsight I'm glad he did. My appreciation for how these games are played has long since changed, and he played brilliantly. I've also come to appreciate drama and friction on the shows, and I do regret my vote to get rid of Will Mega in season one of Big Brother. But here we are in the first paragraph, and already I'm rambling.
Season two of Survivor came around, yet in spite of getting drawn into the previous season, again I didn't feel like watching at first. It was the same story, one day came around where I had nothing else to do and once more I was sucked right in.
I learned my lesson and I've watched every season since from the premiere on. I bring this up, because one of my favourite parts of any season is the first several minutes. From Jeff Probst giving his usual countdown from 39 days to only one survivor, to the mad chaos we are often greeted with when contestants are made to jump from their ship (I know this isn't always the case, but it's always the best). Last season we had players madly grabbing for supplies before they ran out of the time. Nothing has ever topped the season (Vanuatu possibly?) where the camera pulled out from Probst's face and he was standing at the mouth of a volcano.
Unless I missed it, not only did we not get the countdown that should lead into the credits (the theme music starting after he says "one survivor" always gives it an extra punch), but the castaways were shown all together rowing on a boat. Where were the dives? The splashes? The mad swimming for safety?
Nothing. Nineteen people confused as to why they were not split into tribes yet. Congratulations, Mark Burnett, creator of Survivor. This was the most boring entry into a season yet. Luckily it's still Survivor and it's still enjoyable. But next season I want to see Probst being lowered into a shark cage as he gives his countdown and I want to see the contestants jumping from a luxury liner. Those first minutes need to GRAB us! You need to try and top Pearl Islands where Rupert won us over by engaging in a delightful act of piracy.
Okay, now that I've got that off my chest, let's get to the show and it wasn't all bad. Some of it was quite good in fact, and some of it was quite annoying. This season we have 19 contestants, though there were supposed to be 20, but one dropped out at the very last minute. That had to have pissed a lot of people off, especially the person who just missed the cut in favour of that woman (9 women, 10 men, it's easy math). Nice going, Quitty McQuitterpants.
There was a lot of consternation. Where was Probst? Where are their buffs? This was all so confusing, but it can't be good. The producers had to have something evil in store for them!
As it turns out, they did. Building. Probst threw a crate down at them as he flew by in a small plane, and I hope they tethered him before opening the door. Some of the stronger men had trouble breaking the crate open with brute strength. It took one of the oldest and physically frail men to get it open by using his brain and physic. Way to go, Yau-Man! Not only was he able to succeed where stronger men failed, but he proved himself useful around camp in many other ways right from the start, what with originally being from one of the Malaysian provinces on the island of Borneo. True fact: I lived for two years in the town of Miri, which just so happens to be in one of those provinces, Sarawak. That fact alone makes Yau-Man my early favourite, and from what I've been reading, he's an early favourite out there in Viewerland too.
The crate contained a map and instructions. The castaways were to use the map to find where a whole crapload of supplies were waiting. Once they found the supplies, they had to work together to build not just any shelter, but one of the best shelters ever on the show consisting of a sleeping area, a kitchen area, and an outhouse with a real toilet seat.
I don't know if it was coincidence, or her vocation helped get her picked for the show because of this task, but it so happens that one of the contestants is an architect. Perfect! Sylvia is an expert at this stuff, so just listen to her and you'll have it all up in no time!
Of course, this is Survivor. It's not Survivor if you don't have people bitching about being given orders. I honestly don't know how some of these people survive the real world, let alone a distant island jungle. "I don't like people ordering me around!" Suck it up! Do you even have a job with a boss at home?
Then there are those that don't want to work hard. They're on a beautiful island, can't they just relax and enjoy it? This is season 14 of Survivor. FOURTEEN! If you don't know by now that you're going to have to work, don't go! But there are still people who don't bother watching the show and learning from past seasons before they apply or are recruited. Yeah, Survivor recruits contestants. All those shows do. Something to do with not enough pretty people applying, I think. Even if a Canadian could apply, I know I'd never make it on the show, what with being a hideous troll. That's show business. The non-telegenic need not apply.
So despite having someone who knows what the hell she's doing, the shelter wasn't built in time the first day, and the castaways were greeted by a storm their first night. Ooooooh, that's why the shelter should be built quickly! Suffice it to say, the shelter was finished fairly quickly the next day. Good for them.
With 19 contestants vying for camera time, we're not going to meet everyone in the premiere, but we did get to meet three people with annoying nicknames. First was "Boo", but that's really all we got to see of him. We also met "Rocky" and "Dreamz", both of whom ended up arguing the second night, so we saw a lot more of them. "Dreamz" told us in an camera confessional that his plan was to be noticed by everyone. Okay, so he doesn't want to fly under the radar. That's alright. I'd try to stay a little more in the background the first few days, be a hard worker and a strong competitor, but there are several valid strategies. Except the way he decided to be noticed by everyone was by being loud, obnoxious, and not letting anyone get any sleep. "Dreamz" needs to go, and I'm not just talking about his horrible nickname.
Finally we got to the first challenge, and that's where Jeff Probst dropped the bombshell. First, he asked everyone if a leader had emerged yet, and they all agreed on Sylvia. He asked her to come join him. I suspected she would be the first of two captains, and they'd each get to alternate choosing tribemates. But oh no, it was not to be. Instead Sylvia was given the task of separating everyone into the two tribes! Oy vey!
This is one of the reasons it's good to keep a relatively low profile at the start. I'd hate to have been in that position. You never know what's going to piss someone off early on, and unless you know where you're going to end up, you're going to have some very tough decisions.
There were times I suspected she was trying to load one tribe with strength, maybe thinking she'd get to choose which one she gets to join. That's a huge mistake. Never assume on this show. The best option here is to try to match the teams up evenly so that it doesn't matter where you end up.
Sure enough, she had no choice in the matter. After the two tribes were chosen, Sylvia was sent to Exile Island (this time around a place filled with dangerous snakes and somewhat of a shelter up high on stilts). She would then have to join the losing tribe after Tribal Council. She may not have a lot of physical strength, but I think that is very overrated in this game (by both contestants and viewers, sorry, but there is a strong mental component in a lot of the challenges too and let's not forget the very important social aspect of the game), and this means that the first losing tribe won't immediately be shorthanded.
Oh, and the losing tribe would have to leave the camp they helped build and go to another island where they'll have nothing but a pot and a machete. Jaws dropped.
There was a level of strength required for the first challenge, but it all game down to knots and puzzle-solving ability. Huh? HUH? See! Brains! There's a reason zombies don't shuffle around trying to eat muscles!
And so Moto won the first immunity challenge, getting not only one of the most evil looking immunity idols to date, but a couch for their shelter, a jungle shower, hammocks, cutlery, and other assorted items. Sweet.
Ravu, on the other hand, had to go to their new home. In addition to their pot and machete, they got a bit of a cave. Most of the tribe looked on the bright side of this development, but Erica wasn't happy at all and she couldn't understand how the others could be. It's called "not bitching and trying the make the best of a situation", Erica! Yes, use it to build a fire under yourself and try to win from here on out, but don't dwell on it! Oh, I shouldn't have said "build a fire". It turns out they weren't given flint, so they have no fire. At least they have Yau-Man. If he can't keep them alive, nobody can. They should at least be able to drink enough coconut milk to keep from getting too dehydrated.
However, before such silliness like shelter, food, fire, or water, there's something more important to take care of. Scheming! We've only been able to see one alliance form so far. Erica, Jessica, and "Rocky" (because, when Erica and Jessica talked before the tribes were split, they said they needed a man (picture my eyes rolling here, even if it's not a horrible idea)).
They felt strong enough as an alliance that they felt safe. But who do they influence the others to vote out? It should be a woman, of course, according to "Rocky". Of course. Because all women are weak competitors and all men are strong competitors. Who would you rather have on your tribe, Stephanie from Survivors Palau and Guatemala , one of the toughest competitors ever (I don't care what people say about her after Guatemala, she ran that show), or Osten from Survivor: Pearl Islands, the first ever castaway to quit the show. I really hate the sexism and ageism that dominates the pre-merger game.
Anyway, this alliance decided that Rita should be the one to go, and they figured the matter was settled. Jessica and "Rocky" also agreed that if either of them were the ones on the block, they'd tell each other.
You'd think that he would have held up his end of the bargain, but it turns out a three person alliance carries little weight in a tribe of nine people, and pretty much everyone else decided that Jessica should be the one to go. When her name was read at Tribal Council, it was very obvious that "Rocky" never told her, and she was completely blindsided when she was the first person voted off.
Jessica, you were in an alliance of three. Unless you know who most people are voting for, never assume you're safe.
Interestingly enough, even though "Rocky" and Erica didn't tell Jessica she was leaving, they told each other they couldn't bring themselves to write down her name. After three days. In a game where you need to make it all the way to the end to win a million dollars. Write down her friggin' name! If she doesn't understand by the time the episode airs, she wasn't much of a friend after three days!
But they didn't all vote for Rita either. Jessica was the only one who wrote her name down. The other two voted for Yau-Man and Mookie. Mookie. That's gotta be a nickname too. Interesting strategy, if you're going to suck enough not to write down Jessica's name. I hate that they refused to vote for her when it was obvious she was the one leaving, but if you're going to do something stupid like that, I like the way they went about it. The only thing they could have done better was be more strategic about the names they picked to write down. Spread a little paranoia in the right people. But if they weren't smart enough to write Jessica's name, they weren't going to be smart enough to do that. Yau-Man's not a threat to anyone right now, and Mookie's name is Mookie, even if he is one of the strong, young men. I would have maybe picked Earl, and possibly Michelle, though I am fine with Mookie.
So that was it. Far from the best Survivor premiere yet, but with enough good elements to make it not horrible. I can't wait to see how this season shapes up. One thing I haven't mentioned is that instead of one hidden immunity idol, this time around there are two. Sylvia's clue points to one of them being hidden somewhere back at her camp. That should make for an interesting search.


Realivision Update - You may have noticed the title already, but I've shortened it to just the name of the show and the air date. With the new labels system Blogger allows, I see no reason to have it at the beginning and the end now and so "commentary", "recap" and "partial recap" will now be relegated to the labels at the bottom of the posts.